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Shrink For The Shy Guy

Dr. Aziz: Social Anxiety And Confidence Expert, Author and Coach
Shrink For The Shy Guy
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  • This One Tool Will Transform Your Confidence Fast
    🌟 In this powerful episode of "Shrink for the Shy Guy," Dr. Aziz reveals one of the most effective—yet underused—tools for radically boosting confidence: massive action. Unlike cautious baby steps, massive action invites you to shift into a new gear, override hesitation, and start living instead of waiting. Whether it’s in relationships, career, or everyday interactions, the avoidance cycle keeps you stuck. But when you break that pattern and flood your nervous system with bold, repeated action, transformation happens fast. Through vivid stories, including a client who skyrocketed her confidence by shifting from one public talk a month to several a week, you’ll learn that confidence isn’t built by hoping or waiting—it’s built by doing. Dr. Aziz walks you through why this works, what resistance might show up, and how to overcome it. You don’t need to be fearless. You just need to take the leap. 🚀 Ready to finally stop avoiding and start becoming the confident, bold version of you? Tune in to this episode now and discover how to unlock the key you've already been holding. Your freedom starts here.---------------------------------------------- Do you ever feel like you’re stuck in a cage of social anxiety, self-doubt, or people-pleasing? It’s an all-too-common experience. But what if I told you that the key to breaking free and radically transforming your confidence is already in your hands? In this post, we’re diving into one of the most powerful tools you can use to break free from these limitations—and why many people aren’t using it. The Secret to Confidence: Massive Action When it comes to building confidence, the tool I’m about to share might sound simple, but it’s one of the most effective principles I’ve come across in my 20+ years of personal growth and helping others. It’s based on both real-life experience and research, and it’s been proven to work. So, what’s the tool? Massive action. Sounds pretty intense, right? But here’s the thing: the key to getting out of your comfort zone and into a place of true self-assurance is by moving towards what scares you with intensity and urgency. The more we avoid the things that scare us, the stronger our anxiety and self-doubt become. The more we step into those fears, the more our confidence grows. Why We Avoid: The Cycle of Self-Doubt We all know the feeling of wanting to avoid situations that make us anxious—whether it’s speaking up in a meeting, confronting someone in a relationship, or going after a big career opportunity. When we avoid, the anxiety increases, and we lose a little bit of our sense of power. This creates a negative cycle that only deepens the fear and self-doubt. We’re trapped. The other side of the equation is approach: moving towards the things that scare us. When we push through the fear and face it, we start to see that our negative predictions about the situation—“It’s going to go horribly”—are often not true. And with each small victory, we start building a new identity for ourselves: I can do this. I am capable. Why Massive Action Is the Answer Here’s where massive action comes in. You see, sometimes gradual steps just aren’t enough to create the breakthrough you need. If you’ve been tiptoeing around your fears for months, you might need to flip the script entirely. Massive action—doing things in larger, bolder doses—is what creates momentum. For example, let’s say you’re trying to overcome public speaking anxiety. Instead of signing up for one Toastmasters event every few weeks, what if you committed to speaking in front of an audience three times a week? I know, it sounds crazy, but the intensity of this action creates a level of momentum that gradual exposure just can’t match. You’ll short-circuit your fear and push yourself to the edge of what you thought was possible. The Energy Shift: Going from Defense to Offense When you move towards your fears with massive action, you shift from defense mode—where you’re guarding yourself against discomfort and uncertainty—to offense mode, where you’re actively creating the life you want. This energetic shift is what fuels confidence, and it’s what makes you attractive to others. It’s not about pretending you’re perfect or that you’ve got it all together. It’s about owning your value, showing up fully, and knowing that you’ve got what it takes to handle whatever comes your way. The Results of Massive Action Imagine the person who walks into a room with self-assurance—not because they’re the most polished or the most put-together, but because they’ve faced their fears, taken bold action, and no longer let the “I’m not enough” feeling control their life. Here’s the thing: The key to building confidence is taking action even when you don’t feel ready. That’s when the magic happens. You begin to see that the world doesn’t revolve around your fear of being “not enough”—it revolves around the action you’re willing to take, regardless of how you feel. Your Action Step: Choose Massive Action So, what’s next? It’s time to decide how you’re going to move forward. You have two options: Prepare for massive action: Take a few more small steps, build your momentum, and get ready to make a bigger leap. Take massive action now: If you feel ready, dive in headfirst and face your fears with urgency and intensity. The choice is yours, but know this: If you want to create the life you deserve, massive action is required. This isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up and taking bold steps toward your future. Final Thoughts: You Are Enough The biggest lie that holds people back is that they’re not enough. But the truth is, you are enough right now. What’s holding you back is the fear and the stories you’ve been telling yourself. Let’s break those stories and start taking massive action to create the life you’ve always wanted. Remember, you’re not alone on this journey. You have the tools, the support, and the power to shift your life. It’s time to claim it.
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  • Fear To Freedom with Amy Joy
    Own Your Confidence: Be Unapologetically You!A glimpse from the latest episode of Get Your Sh*t Together Show with the special guest Dr. Aziz hosted by Amy Joy.Watch the full episode here.
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  • But I Still Feel Like I'm Not Enough!
    Welcome to today’s episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy with Dr. Aziz — and today we’re going straight into one of the most common, painful, and persistent feelings that quietly runs so many lives: 👉 “I’m not enough.” This episode is for you if you’ve ever: Felt like no matter how much you do, it’s never quite enough Believed you had to prove your worth through achievement or perfection Avoided risks, opportunities, or putting yourself out there because of self-doubt Collapsed into hopelessness or excuses just to protect yourself from trying 🎯 Dr. Aziz breaks down: Why this feeling of “not enough” is a universal part of being human Why trying to fix it through more doing never works (just ask Tony Robbins!) How to stop confusing this feeling with reality The truth about your self-worth that no accomplishment (or failure) can touch A simple mindset shift to help you show up fully — even when that insecure voice gets loud If you're ready to stop being controlled by this invisible wall of “not enough,” tune in now and take back your freedom.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ever catch yourself thinking, "I'm not good enough"? It's a common thought that can keep us stuck, whether we're pursuing relationships, career opportunities, or even personal growth. This persistent feeling of inadequacy can impact your confidence and stop you from taking bold actions. In this post, I'll share how to recognize this feeling, understand it, and break free from its grip, allowing you to create a life where you feel truly empowered and worthy. Understanding the "Not Enough" Feeling First things first: you are not alone. The feeling of “not enough” is a deeply human experience, and almost everyone grapples with it at some point in their lives. Whether it’s in relationships, career, or personal achievements, the fear of not being “enough” leads to a variety of behaviors and mindsets. So, what makes this feeling so powerful? It's rooted in the fear of loss—loss of love, connection, respect, or even survival. If I’m not enough, then I’ll lose something important, like love or worthiness. The key here is recognizing that this fear is not reality. It’s simply an emotional response to uncertainty, and once we understand that, we can begin to take control. Why "Proving Enough" Doesn't Work Most of us try to fix the “not enough” feeling by doing more. We hustle, work harder, or try to accumulate external symbols of success—titles, possessions, or achievements. The goal? To prove that we are worthy. But here’s the catch: doing more doesn’t make you enough. It’s an endless cycle. You can’t hustle your way to self-worth because the feeling of not being enough is never truly satisfied by external validation. Even once you achieve one goal, the sense of inadequacy may still linger. Real confidence doesn’t come from what you do; it comes from who you are. A Powerful Shift: Own Your Value What if you could break the cycle? The real secret to overcoming the “not enough” feeling is to own your value—not based on what you’ve done, but simply because you exist. Here’s the truth: Confidence comes from within. It’s about showing up with a mindset of abundance. When you believe that you are worthy, you stop feeling like you need to prove yourself to others. You begin to approach life with a healthy mindset, knowing that you are enough as you are. “Your energy is what makes you attractive—not your appearance, not your possessions, but the way you show up in the world.” — Dr. Aziz When you stop operating from a place of scarcity (like "I’m not good enough"), you become magnetic. You attract people, opportunities, and experiences because your energy exudes self-assurance and worth. The Power of Feeling Insecure (And Letting It Pass) One of the most powerful lessons you can learn is to feel your feelings instead of trying to avoid or suppress them. The feeling of “not enough” is simply a temporary emotional experience—it doesn’t define you. When you can create space for that feeling without needing to fix it, you break free from its control. Imagine a scenario where you feel insecure. Instead of getting caught in a loop of negative self-talk or trying to do more to prove yourself, allow yourself to feel the insecurity. Name it: “This is the feeling of insecurity.” Let it pass through you without clinging to it. Over time, this practice will reduce its power over you and make you more resilient. “The more you embrace feelings of insecurity, the more you free yourself from their control.” — Dr. Aziz Final Thoughts: You Are Enough The next time you feel like you’re not enough, remember: it’s just a feeling, not a reflection of your worth. By practicing self-awareness and embracing your emotions, you can overcome this limiting belief and step into your true confidence. Take a moment today to remind yourself: You are enough.
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  • The Freedom of Being Disliked
    Welcome to today’s episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy with Dr. Aziz! We’re diving into one of the most universal — and often hidden — fears that drives social anxiety, people-pleasing, and holding back your authentic self: 👉 What if they don’t like me? Whether it shows up in your relationships, your inbox, at work, or stops you from sharing your ideas and creative work with the world — this fear can run your life if left unchecked. In this episode, you’ll discover: How fear of judgment and rejection hides behind stress, email anxiety, and overthinking Why being “thick-skinned” isn’t the answer (and what to do instead) A powerful metaphor to help you release other people’s negativity without taking it on The truth about being sensitive — and why it might actually be your superpower How to stop living in fear of upsetting others and start showing up fully you This one’s loaded with humor, honesty, and deep insights to help you finally break the spell of needing everyone to like you. Let’s get free.----------------------------------------------------- Do you ever find yourself constantly worrying about what others think? Maybe you're hesitant to speak your mind or take action, fearing rejection or judgment. If you're nodding along, you're not alone. Many of us struggle with the desire to please others and avoid conflict, but the good news is, you can break free from this cycle and become the most authentic version of yourself. The People-Pleasing Trap One of the biggest obstacles to living authentically is the fear of being disliked or upsetting others. You may find yourself bending over backward to keep the peace, saying "yes" when you want to say "no," or avoiding difficult conversations altogether. But here's the truth: this constant effort to manage others' perceptions is draining, and it doesn't bring lasting peace or fulfillment. As Dr. Aziz shares, this behavior is often rooted in a fear of being rejected or disliked. Whether it's a colleague, a family member, or a stranger, the thought of someone not approving of us can cause anxiety and paralysis. And while it’s natural to care about what others think, letting this fear control you leads to missed opportunities for growth, connection, and authenticity. "You can’t live authentically if you’re constantly adjusting yourself to fit others' expectations." — Dr. Aziz Step 1: Recognize the Fear The first step to overcoming people-pleasing is to recognize the fear that’s driving your actions. Often, this fear isn’t obvious. It may show up as anxiety about a social interaction or a sense of dread about a potential conflict. You might feel this as tightness in your chest or a racing mind, trying to predict what others will think of you. Ask yourself: What am I afraid of? Are you worried that someone will be upset with you, or that they’ll think poorly of you? Getting clear on the root of your fear is key to dismantling it. Recognize that these fears are often exaggerated and not as harmful as they may seem in your mind. Step 2: Acknowledge Your Sensitivity One powerful insight Dr. Aziz shares is the importance of acknowledging your sensitivity. It’s easy to see sensitivity as a weakness, but the truth is, it’s a superpower. It allows you to connect deeply with others and perceive emotions and nuances that others might miss. For Dr. Aziz, recognizing his own sensitivity was a turning point in his journey toward authenticity. Once he embraced this part of himself, he found it easier to connect with others on a deeper level. By seeing sensitivity as a gift, not a burden, you can stop avoiding difficult situations or suppressing your true self. "Sensitivity is not a weakness. It’s a form of responsiveness to life and a superpower if you let it be." — Dr. Aziz Step 3: Let Go of the Need for Control Here’s the hardest part: you don’t need to control other people's feelings. This realization is freeing. Often, our desire to please comes from a deep need to control how others perceive us or how they feel in any given moment. But the truth is, you cannot control others' emotions or reactions. Dr. Aziz encourages us to imagine ourselves as a vapor—soft, fluid, and not attached to any one thing. When someone gets upset with you, instead of bracing yourself and trying to protect your identity, let the feeling pass through you. "Let it move right through. There’s nothing for it to hold on to." The Action Step: Practice Letting Go Your action step today is to practice letting go of the need to control how others feel. When you encounter a situation where you're worried about someone's reaction or judgment, visualize yourself as vapor, creating space around you. Let that feeling of discomfort move through you without holding on to it. This will help you become more present in the moment and less consumed by fear. Remember, every time you choose authenticity over people-pleasing, you're building confidence. Confidence doesn’t come from pretending to be someone you’re not; it comes from embracing who you truly are. The Key to True Freedom As Dr. Aziz says, confidence is a byproduct of action. When you take action—whether it’s in social situations, your career, or relationships—you’ll find that your confidence grows, naturally. You can stop worrying about pleasing others and start living life authentically. By acknowledging your fears, embracing your sensitivity, and letting go of the need to control how others feel, you’ll free yourself from the shackles of people-pleasing. It’s time to step into your true self and embrace the freedom that comes with being authentically you. You are worthy. You are enough. And you are awesome just as you are. Keep taking bold action and know that every step you take toward authenticity is a step toward true freedom.
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  • 3 Secrets To Get Yourself To Take Action Now
    Welcome to today’s episode of Shrink for the Shy Guy with Dr. Aziz! If you’ve ever felt stuck, procrastinated, or told yourself “I should…” but still didn’t follow through — this episode is for you. Dr. Aziz reveals the three powerful secrets to breaking out of avoidance and finally taking the action you know will move your life forward. Whether it’s social confidence, career growth, health habits, or daily routines — it all comes back to one key truth: Confidence is a byproduct of action. In this episode, you’ll discover: Why resistance, groaning, and procrastination are totally normal (and how to break through them) The surprising way your identity story might be keeping you stuck How to use pain as powerful leverage (yes, really!) The missing piece that makes it way easier to follow through Why pleasure in the future is the key to taking action today Dr. Aziz also shares his personal story of emotional pain, transformation, and how one pivotal night in his 20s changed everything. If you're ready to overcome avoidance and create a life that energizes and fulfills you, this episode will give you both the mindset and momentum to start now. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Do you often find yourself stuck in the cycle of procrastination, avoiding tasks that you know could improve your life? Whether it's taking social risks, having difficult conversations, or simply getting things done, we all face moments when it feels impossible to take action. In this post, I’m going to reveal the three secrets to breaking free from inaction and boosting your confidence. Secret #1: Recognize the Pattern The first step in overcoming procrastination and avoidance is to recognize the cycle you’re in. It often starts with the feeling of fear—fear of failure, fear of judgment, or fear of discomfort. You know you should act, but instead, you avoid the task. You tell yourself “I should,” but you don’t follow through. This internal tension leads to resistance, and eventually, you may find yourself stuck in a negative identity—thinking of yourself as someone who just can’t follow through or is too scared to act. The first secret is to notice this pattern. Acknowledge that you’re caught in it and make the decision to do something different. The more you notice it, the more you can break free from it and start acting from a place of empowerment, not fear. "Confidence is a byproduct of action. You won’t feel confident until you take action." — Dr. Aziz Secret #2: Use Pain as Leverage Pain is one of the most powerful motivators for action. In fact, research shows that we are twice as motivated by pain as we are by pleasure. The key is to leverage pain in a constructive way. Ask yourself: What is the cost of inaction? If you keep avoiding something, where will it take you? In the case of social anxiety, it might be loneliness or missed career opportunities. By focusing on the pain of staying stuck, you can create a sense of urgency and motivate yourself to act. However, it's essential to not get lost in despair when reflecting on this pain. Instead, take ownership of the situation and realize that you can change things. When the pain of staying where you are exceeds the fear of the unknown, you’ll finally take the leap. Secret #3: Focus on the Pleasure of Action While pain can push you to act, pleasure is what will keep you going. We often resist action because we focus on the discomfort of getting started, but if you shift your focus to the benefits of taking action, you’ll find yourself motivated. For example, if you’re avoiding a workout because it feels hard to start, remind yourself of how good you’ll feel afterward—the energy, the sense of accomplishment, the pride in doing something for yourself. By training your mind to see the pleasure on the other side, you’ll feel more compelled to take action. "Are you willing to be uncomfortable now to experience the extraordinary in your life?" — Dr. Aziz Taking Action: Your Next Step Now that you know the three secrets to taking action, it’s time to put them into practice. Start by recognizing the patterns that hold you back, use pain and pleasure to motivate yourself, and take action even when it feels uncomfortable. If you want to make real progress in your life, the key is consistent action. The more you act, the more confidence you’ll build. It’s time to break free from the cycle of procrastination and start living boldly. Remember, confidence comes from doing—not waiting for the perfect moment or feeling ready. Take action today, and watch your confidence grow! You are capable of so much more than you realize. Keep going, and you'll soon be amazed at how far you can go.
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About Shrink For The Shy Guy

Everyone has some level of fear in social situations. For you it might be meeting someone new, networking, dating, sales conversations, presenting, public speaking, or business meetings. In order to get to the next level in your life, create better relationships, find love, earn more money, or advance in your career, you must overcome fear, social anxiety, and self-doubt. In order to be outstanding, you must have confidence. That's where Dr. Aziz comes in. After struggling with shyness and social anxiety for 9 years, he decided to take life into his own hands and master confidence. A decade later, he is the world's leading expert on social anxiety and social confidence. He received a doctorate in clinical psychology from Stanford and Palo Alto Universities and now works as a confidence and success coach with people from all over the world. This show contains the profound and immediately life-changing information he teaches high-paying clients every day. Learn from the best about how to overcome social fear, gain confidence in dating, public speaking, sales presentations, business meetings, and all of life.
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