The Terri Cole Show

A lot of what gets called "setting a boundary" out on the internet and in real life isn't a boundary at all. 
Boundaries are not punishment. 
They are not a lever for controlling other people. 
They are not what you do when someone makes you mad. 
I wrote a whole book about this called Boundary Boss, and the definition is simple. Your boundaries are your preferences, your desires, your limits, and your deal breakers, plus your ability to communicate them. That is the whole thing.
Misnaming a boundary does not just sound wrong; it makes the work harder. When you call a threat a boundary, communication has become confusing, and you may keep fighting about the same things on a loop. 
Here are the five most common boundary impostors.
Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/837

In this episode, I sit down with bestselling author Jane Green to talk about her rewilding memoir and her powerful journey of midlife reinvention.
We explore what happens when a woman reclaims her identity after success, marriage, and emotional breakdown — and what it really means to rebuild a life rooted in authenticity, boundaries, and self-worth.
We also dive into themes like the empty nester identity crisis, people pleasing recovery, and how somatic healing can help us process deep emotional trauma stored in the body.
If you've ever asked yourself how to rebuild your life after divorce, or how to stop people-pleasing and finally set healthy boundaries, this conversation will resonate deeply with you.
This is not just an interview — it's a conversation about coming home to yourself.
Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/836

"It's fine." "I got it." "Don't worry about me." "I'll figure it out."
If you say one of these without thinking, several times a day, this episode is for you. These are the phrases that keep us stuck in high-functioning codependent behavior, and they sound generous. But there is an invisibility to what we are doing, and a cost.
These automatic behaviors are a nervous system response, habituated over years. As high-functioning codependents (HFCs), we react before we think, the moment a problem comes up. Learning to pause is the intervention. That moment before you say I got it is where the work happens, because on autopilot it is hard to change what comes out of your mouth.
Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/835

Ever felt ignored, dismissed, or completely rushed by your doctor? In this episode, OB-GYN physician assistant and medical advocate Nikki Sapiro Vincier exposes the systemic flaws inside reproductive healthcare—and shares exactly how you can take control of your medical care today.
I sat down with Nikki to unpack the disturbing reality of medical gaslighting, why it takes an average of 7 to 10 years to get an endometriosis diagnosis, and why "breaking up with your doctor" might actually save your life. Whether you are navigating the gaps in postpartum care, trying to survive perimenopause, or just trying to get a straight answer from your clinician, Nikki provides the ultimate step-by-step guide to triaging your own symptoms, gathering your "receipts," and demanding the care you deserve.
It's time to stop passively existing in a system that wasn't built to serve you.
Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/834

Do you know what you need? Not what your kids need, or what your partner needs, or what your team at work needs. What you need.
In my therapy practice, when I ask high-functioning women what they need for the coming week, many of them either freeze or hand me a list of responsibilities. Things they have to get done. These things are not the same thing.
Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/833