209 episodes
- Explore the Unhooked app: https://unhookedapp.co
In this episode of Unhooked, I sit down with Ben Brown, host of The Shift podcast, to talk about his journey from years of compulsive sex, porn, validation-seeking, alcohol, and drugs into a life of recovery, purpose, and transformation.
Ben shares what his life looked like before recovery, including the constant pursuit of women, escalating porn use, partying, and the feeling that he was becoming someone he thought he needed to be.
We talk about the moments that finally made him realize something wasn't right, including a chance encounter with a stranger who told him how sex addiction had destroyed his life, and the experience that finally pushed Ben to walk into a recovery room.
We also get into what actually helped him change: community, mentors, faith, willpower, small daily habits, and finding something meaningful to put his energy into.
And Ben shares one of the biggest lessons from his recovery: you are not exempt. No matter how much shame you carry or how far gone you think you are, you can still change your life.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- Why addiction can become a way of escaping discomfort and seeking validation
- What finally pushed Ben to seek recovery after years of compulsive behavior
- Why willpower can help in the early stages but isn't enough for long-term recovery
- How small daily wins can build momentum and create lasting change
- Why finding a “mountain to climb” can help redirect sexual and creative energy into something meaningful
Recovery doesn't happen all at once. Sometimes it starts with one small decision, one mentor, one meeting, or simply taking the first step.
🔵 Want to break free? Join Unhooked Academy now: https://www.unhookedacademy.com/
Explore the Unhooked app: https://unhookedapp.co
Connect with Ben
Ben Brown / The Shift Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-shift-a-podcast-with-ben-brown/id1887649490
Instagram: @benbrown3000 https://www.instagram.com/benbrown3000/
YouTube: The Shift Podcast with Ben Brown https://www.youtube.com/@theshiftpodcastwithbenbrown
Website: The Shift with Ben Brown https://www.theshiftwithbenbrown.com/ Why Quitting Porn Doesn’t Fix the Real Problem | Jeremy Lipkowitz Interviewed on Sam's Healing Podcast
2026/09/28 | 38 mins.🔵 Want to break free? Join Unhooked Academy now: https://www.unhookedacademy.com/
Explore the Unhooked app: https://unhookedapp.co
What if stopping porn isn't actually the thing that creates lasting recovery?
In this episode of Unhooked, I’m resharing a conversation I had on Sam’s Healing Podcast about porn addiction, recovery, and what it really takes to build lasting freedom.
We talk about why porn itself is often not the underlying problem, but instead a way of escaping uncomfortable emotions, stress, loneliness, boredom, insecurity, or other difficult experiences. I also explain why simply chasing a streak or practicing sobriety without doing the deeper inner work can leave the underlying issues untouched.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- Why sobriety alone isn't the same as recovery and why the underlying reasons behind the behavior matter
- How porn can become a coping mechanism for stress, loneliness, boredom, insecurity, and other uncomfortable emotions
- Why I describe meditation as strength training for the mind and how it can help build greater awareness and self-control
- How the Reset → Rewire → Rebuild → Restore framework supports lasting transformation
- Why learning to sit with discomfort instead of escaping it is an essential part of creating real freedom
If you're early in recovery and looking for a clear, grounded overview of what this work actually involves, this is a good place to start.
Ready to start your recovery?
Explore the Unhooked app: https://unhookedapp.co
Timestamps:
00:00 Why Sobriety Isn’t Recovery
02:59 Welcome to Unhooked
03:37 Introducing Jeremy and Unhooked
04:47 Why I Created Unhooked
06:02 Why Do We Get Hooked on Porn?
09:05 Why Sobriety Alone Isn’t Enough
11:09 Cross-Addictions and Replacing Unhealthy Habits
12:29 Meditation as Strength Training for the Mind
15:23 Different Types of Meditation
17:01 How to Let Go of the Performance Mindset
18:22 Why a Structured Meditation Practice Matters
20:04 The Four Phases of Recovery
21:28 Reset: Getting Clear on Where You’re Going
23:32 Rewire: Using Neuroplasticity for Change
25:04 Rebuild: Changing Your Environment and Habits
26:59 Restore: Building a Life of Fulfillment
28:42 Solitude vs. Isolation
30:14 Why We Run From Unpleasant Experiences
31:56 Learning to Sit With Discomfort
32:56 Why You Have to Take Ownership of Your Recovery
34:21 Can You Really Break Free?
36:27 Where to Learn More About Unhooked
37:21 Sam’s Closing Thoughts
37:56 Final ThoughtsHow to Heal After Infidelity: Honesty, Shame & Rebuilding Trust | Sam from Sam’s Healing Podcast
2026/09/21 | 57 mins.🔵 Want to break free? Join Unhooked Academy now: https://www.unhookedacademy.com/
Explore the Unhooked app: https://unhookedapp.co
What does it actually take to heal after infidelity, and why does defensiveness make rebuilding trust so difficult?
In this episode of Unhooked, I sit down with Sam from Sam's Healing Podcast to talk about infidelity, addiction, and what real recovery looks like after betrayal.
Sam shares his own journey after an affair that turned his life upside down. We talk about why radical honesty is the first step toward healing, how defensiveness gets in the way of rebuilding trust, and why taking ownership of your actions matters so much.
We also explore how childhood wounds can shape destructive coping patterns, the role of community and mentorship in recovery, and why healing looks different for every person and relationship.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- Why radical honesty is the first step in recovery
- How defensiveness and blame-shifting get in the way of healing
- The difference between guilt and shame
- Why self-acceptance and accountability go hand in hand
- What recovery looks like for both the unfaithful and betrayed partner
- Why healing takes time and what makes rebuilding trust possible
If you're navigating addiction, infidelity, or the difficult process of rebuilding trust after betrayal, this conversation is for you.
Ready to start your recovery?
Explore the Unhooked app: https://unhookedapp.co
Connect with Sam:
Sam's Healing Podcast on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@samshealingpodcast and podcast platforms https://www.samshealingpodcast.com/
Timestamps:
00:00 Sam's story of despair and recovery
01:39 Episode introduction
03:32 Welcome to Unhooked
04:24 Sam's journey into recovery
08:44 Why radical honesty is the first step
12:53 Becoming a student of recovery and finding support
19:48 Understanding childhood wounds and the roots of addiction
24:08 The turning point: Feeling worthy of love
30:04 Self-acceptance and doing the next right thing
35:33 Balancing self-acceptance with personal growth
40:27 Why people become defensive in recovery
41:56 Shame, guilt, and taking responsibility
45:46 What healing looks like for the betrayed partner
49:59 How long does healing after infidelity take?
52:38 Can couples truly heal after infidelity?
55:34 Where to find Sam
56:57 Closing thoughts- 🔵 Want to break free? Join Unhooked Academy now: https://www.unhookedacademy.com/
Interested in the Unhooked App? Join the waitlist here:
https://unhookedapp.co/
Jeremy Lipkowitz reshared his appearance on The Therapy Brothers podcast, where Brendan and Tyler Patrick interview him about how meditation and mindfulness can support recovery. Jeremy explains why mindfulness does not have to conflict with religious faith, and why it is better understood as a practical way to train attention, awareness, and intentional choice. He breaks down the space between stimulus and response and how learning to access that space can help interrupt automatic reactions like craving, anger, fear, and judgment. The conversation also explores neuroplasticity and Jeremy’s “meadow” analogy for how repeated thoughts and behaviors strengthen mental pathways over time. They unpack the meaning of equanimity, why groundedness matters when facing both discomfort and temptation, and how even a simple breath-awareness practice can begin strengthening concentration, self-compassion, emotional regulation, and the ability to respond rather than react.
Chapters:
00:00 Why mindfulness matters in recovery
04:10 Welcome to the episode
04:54 Is meditation against religion?
06:40 What mindfulness really is
09:30 The mindset behind mindfulness-based recovery
13:36 How mindfulness helps with urges and reactions
14:14 Neuroplasticity: how the brain changes
17:01 The meadow analogy explained
18:22 What is equanimity?
20:29 How to begin meditating
23:09 Closing thoughts How to Rebuild Trust After Betrayal and Porn Addiction | Brannon & Tyler Patrick (The Therapy Brothers)
2026/09/07 | 1h 4 mins.🔵 Want to break free? Join Unhooked Academy now: https://www.unhookedacademy.com/
Interested in the Unhooked App? Join the waitlist here:
https://unhookedapp.co/
Jeremy Lipkowitz hosts Brannon and Tyler Patrick on Unhooked to discuss why sobriety and recovery are not the same thing. The brothers are licensed clinicians with about forty years of combined experience treating porn addiction and betrayal trauma, and they host The Therapy Brothers podcast. They explain why a heavy emphasis on sobriety is a prelude to relapse, why focusing on inputs beats chasing a streak, and why recovery worked for a spouse always collapses. Tyler breaks down their trust equation for rebuilding trust after betrayal: shame resiliency on both sides plus rigorous honesty, empathy, and consistent action over time. They also cover what real humility is, the hero's journey framework behind their men's program, healthy disclosure versus probation officer check-ins, and what a betrayed partner is really asking underneath the questions about details.
Chapters:
00:00:00 The energy that actually sustains recovery
00:01:01 The cave you fear to enter
00:01:50 Episode intro and the Unhooked app waitlist
00:04:35 Welcome Tyler and Brannon Patrick
00:05:42 Taking men from untrustworthy to trustworthy
00:06:55 What twenty years changed about their approach
00:10:32 How each brother found this work
00:14:08 Sobriety versus recovery
00:17:31 The paradox: does that mean relapse is fine?
00:20:28 Guys who do not know their sobriety date
00:22:17 When sobriety becomes a weapon
00:23:38 Trap one: getting humility backwards
00:24:54 Trap two: recovering for your spouse
00:28:31 Resentment, and turning your partner into your god
00:28:57 Why the instinct to perform makes sense
00:30:39 Corrective experiences and the challenges they run
00:35:30 The hero's journey
00:36:25 Tyler's map of energies, from coercion to love
00:39:05 When a man will not step over the threshold
00:42:26 The parable of the snake and the apples
00:44:53 Where rebuilding trust starts: rigorous honesty
00:46:11 When your partner draws a hard line
00:48:39 Disclosure, lines of defense, and check ins that work
00:49:03 The trust equation
00:51:43 What a betrayed partner is really asking
00:52:58 What actually needs to be disclosed
00:56:35 Harnessing sexuality instead of killing it
00:58:30 What they want couples to hear
01:03:03 Where to find Tyler and Brannon
01:03:45 Closing
The Therapy Brothers, for Unhooked listeners: therapybrothers.org/unhooked
Unhooked Academy: unhookedacademy.com
Unhooked app waitlist: unhookedapp.co
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About Unhooked: Breaking Porn Addiction Podcast
Unhooked is a podcast dedicated to helping people break free from porn addiction and other compulsive behaviors related to the internet, sex, and intimacy. Rooted in Buddhist wisdom, neuroscience, coaching, and mindfulness, the show explores practical strategies for lasting recovery and personal transformation. Each episode features leading experts, scientists, coaches, and individuals in recovery, sharing their insights, experiences, and expertise to guide listeners on their path to healing and freedom.
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