Help Me Be Me

This is an episode aimed at being connected to yourself in a loving way and coming from compassion with others in your life. It’s an invitation to connect to yourself and others more deeply. Grace is defined as courteous goodwill or (in religious terms) the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God. I am using this term “grace” to refer to a resting state of love and receptivity. This is how we can be of service to others and also how we expand our quality of life. The greatest path to a feeling of self-satisfaction is to do something that you are proud of, which comes about pretty often when you live from a state of grace as you move through the world. To be honest, I am very embarrassed by this episode but I 100% mean it. It’s SUPER gooey and touchy-feely, but it’s something I need to hear and therefore, I am posting it! Why? I feel we are all managing the imbalances created by a fast-paced, adult, functioning life, and many of us are medicating to have access to our humanity. We get these fleeting windows where we have a full awareness of life’s meaning, our boundless love, and creativity. So this is a reflective episode aimed at being able to access these parts of ourselves and live through them. Tapping into the vein that was so primary in our childhood. I think part of that equation is to live in a state of grace: giving it to yourself and to others.   Support this week’s sponsors: Greenlight Greenlight is a debit card and money app made for families. Sign up for Greenlight today at Greenlight.com/helpmebeme   LMNT Get your free LMNT Sample Pack with any purchase at DrinkLMNT.com/HelpMeBeMe Also try the new LMNT Sparkling — a bold, 16-ounce can of sparkling electrolyte water.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for relationships that can be best described as dry kindling: dealing, politely, but no warmth or closeness. Maybe you feel your partner is critical, that you are invisible, and when fights occur, they go to DEFCON level 1 instantly, and nothing gets resolved, the loop only resets. So in the day to day, there’s little connection between you. If this sounds familiar, I want you to imagine you and your partner are in a glass display. Like a window at a store. Close to 90% of all communication is non-verbal, so if you are noticing there is no love and affection being expressed on a non-verbal level, this is one place to start. More on this in the episode plus tools for stepping back from the hurt. A little change can go a long way in allowing the love that still lives to come forth. Big caveat: this episode is for those in “safe” relationships, not abusive ones. If you are in an abusive relationship here is one resource to get help: National Domestic Violence Hotline.   Support this week’s sponsors: MeUndies Check out the brand new MeUndies Kids line today! To get 20% off your first order, plus free shipping, go to MeUndies.com/helpmebeme and enter promo code helpmebeme   Chewy Chewy is helping take the stress out of the holidays. Take advantage of amazing holiday savings and shop my personal favorites at Chewy.com/podhelpmebeme   BetterHelp Let the gratitude flow, with BetterHelp. Visit Betterhelp.com/helpmebeme today to get 10% off your first month. LMNT  Get your free LMNT Sample Pack with any purchase at DrinkLMNT.com/HelpMeBeMe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who has done self-work and is reentering a family situation where you know you have triggers. It’s so you can stay above the loops that tend to get us feeling angry, hurt or defensive – feeling like a child once again. If you’ve been healthier outside of a particular family dynamic, it can feel like you are getting pulled back into a stew of old feelings– even when everyone in the group has the best intentions and is doing their best to be loving. Projection is a massive piece of what triggers really upsetting family dynamics. We try and validate what’s inside by engaging those outside of us to affirm it.   The end of the year is also when a lot of “stuff” comes up: it’s a milestone because of the seasonal change, the holidays, revisiting old places and relationships. It can mean there’s a bit of taking stock: looking backward, looking forward. But also – a flooding of old feelings. This episode has tools for staying loving and neutral –doing no harm to yourself and others. My hope is that when you listen to this you will be able to come from love and also not take another person’s pain personally. When you know this ahead of time you can stay outside a trigger loop and come from love.   Support our sponsors! Nature’s Blend Go to drmartypets.com/helpmebeme for up to 54% OFF Nature’s Blend and get a free bag of Cod Crispies, their bestselling wild-caught cod skin treats. Greenlight Millions of parents and kids are learning about money on the Greenlight app! Sign up for Greenlight today at Greenlight.com/helpmebeme Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“I’m ugly” “I should be better by now” “I’m a terrible mother” “My relevance is over” “I’m old”… Everybody has these thoughts. They are average. What matters is whether or not you engage with the thoughts and follow their tangent. You can quite literally start thinking ANYTHING repeatedly and you will start to see it as true. There is no such thing as true or not true, only what you experience through your own lens. The way the brain works is via comparison. It’s a threat-calculator – a unique and special one trained on our experiences. But it is not “us” in the bigger sense. “We” are the silent watcher, the presence within that witnesses these thoughts. The moment they occur there’s a choice to be made – you can follow the feeling and invest in the script, like you’re an actor in a play, or you can look at them – step back, and resume a state of non-attachment. This is an episode all about escaping from thought prison. Have you seen around thoughts yet? This is the goal in this episode. Find this podcast on YouTube here. Support this week’s sponsors! Nature’s Blend For a limited time, enjoy up to 54% OFF Nature’s Blend and get a free bag of Cod Crispies, their bestselling wild-caught cod skin treats. Go to drmartypets.com/HELPMEBEME. Every order is backed by a 90-day money-back promise. BetterHelp Overcome your fears, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/helpmebeme today to get 10% off your first month. LMNT Get your free LMNT Sample Pack with any purchase at DrinkLMNT.com/HelpMeBeMe Also try the new LMNT Sparkling — a bold, 16-ounce can of sparkling electrolyte water. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices