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Black Girl Burnout

Kelley Bonner
Black Girl Burnout
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  • When Juggling Isn’t Joyful: The Cost of Carrying It All
    In this deeply personal episode of Black Girl Burnout, host Kelley opens up about the exhaustion that comes with trying to hold everything together—career, caregiving, friendships, and self-care. She examines why so many high-achieving Black women feel pressured to “keep all the balls in the air,” and what it means to pause, realign, and choose peace over perfection. Kelley invites listeners to question the story behind their constant juggling and to gently let go of the myth that balance means doing it all.KEY TAKEAWAYSThe belief that we can “have it all” and “do it all” is a system trap that fuels burnout.Silence around struggle keeps us isolated—naming the cost of success is an act of healing.Balance isn’t the goal; alignment is. True peace comes from dropping what doesn’t serve you.Giving yourself permission to pause is not failure—it’s an act of reclaiming your capacity.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & TIMESTAMPS00:00 – Kelley shares her personal experience of juggling multiple roles and feeling stretched thin.03:00 – The myths of “having it all” and “doing it all” as silent traps for high-achieving women.07:50 – Why “balance” keeps us burned out—and how “alignment” offers a softer, truer alternative.15:30 – Practical reflection: What are you juggling right now, and what can you safely put down?GENTLE CALL TO ACTIONTake a quiet moment this week to notice what you’ve been juggling out of fear or obligation. Ask yourself: What can I set down, even for a little while? Share your reflections with us on social media @blackgirlburnout, or leave a review to help another Black woman find this space of rest and relief.Our Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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  • Opt Into Delicious Discipline: Finding Joy in Everyday Habits
    In this episode of Black Girl Burnout, Kelley invites you to rethink what discipline can feel like. Instead of viewing structure as a restriction, she shares how to make discipline delicious by weaving in joy and pleasure through a practice called dopamine anchoring. This gentle, neuroscience-backed approach helps you stay consistent without relying on willpower or burnout cycles—proving that pleasure isn’t a distraction from your goals, it’s the fuel that enables you to reach them.KEY TAKEAWAYSJoy isn’t a reward—it’s the engine that makes meaningful work possible.Discipline becomes sustainable when it’s paired with consistent pleasure and sensory anchors.Small rituals like scent, music, or sunlight can rewire your brain to associate joy with effort.You don’t have to earn rest or play—integrating them into your routines leads to lasting change.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS00:58 — Why “work hard, play later” doesn’t work for your nervous system04:53 — How dopamine anchoring transforms chores and routines into joyful rituals08:29 — Kelley’s personal journey from hustle and burnout to rhythm and ease15:22 — Simple ways to create your own sensory and movement anchors for daily joyA GENTLE INVITATIONStart small: choose one daily task and pair it with a simple pleasure—a favorite scent, a song, or a five-minute stretch. Notice how that shift changes your energy.Then, share your experience with us on Instagram @blackgirlburnout or tag us using #OptIntoJoy.If this episode helped you reimagine what discipline can feel like, follow Black Girl Burnout on your favorite podcast platform and leave a gentle 5-star review to help more women find this community of rest, joy, and abundance.SUPPORT THE SHOWAre you experimenting with new ways to rest? Whether it’s saying no to one more obligation, shutting your laptop at 5 p.m., or taking a slow walk with no agenda, capture that moment of ease. Share it with us:@blackgirlburnoutSubscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.comWatch the episode on YouTubeDrop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.STAY IN TOUCHJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.OUR SPONSORSCheck out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Pharmanutra: pharmanutra-us.comSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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  • Opt Into Doing Your Best
    In this reflective solo episode, host Kelley explores what it means to “do your best” when your best no longer looks the same. Drawing from her experience with grief, aging, and shifting capacity, Kelley redefines productivity and success through softness and self-compassion. She invites listeners to release perfectionism, honor their limits, and embrace a gentler approach to achievement.This episode is a tender reminder that your best self is not about doing more—it’s about doing what’s sustainable and aligned with who you are today.KEY TAKEAWAYSDoing your best changes with your season of life—honor your current capacity.Softness and rest are not weakness; they are essential to long-term fulfillment.Cultural and familial conditioning can disguise perfectionism as ambition.Redefining excellence can help you reclaim balance, visibility, and joy.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS00:00 – Redefining “Your Best”Kelley opens up about end-of-year pressures and how “soft lock-in” challenges the old habit of grinding.04:00 – Listening to the Body’s SignalsShe reflects on grief, aging, and the body’s cues for rest and slowing down.07:00 – Unlearning the Need to OverperformKelley unpacks how cultural narratives about excellence and representation shaped her identity.18:00 – Choosing Ease and VisibilityShe closes by discussing how striving for perfection leads to burnout and invisibility—and how choosing ease brings peace.SUPPORT THE SHOWAre you experimenting with new ways to rest? Whether it’s saying no to one more obligation, shutting your laptop at 5 p.m., or taking a slow walk with no agenda, capture that moment of ease. Share it with us:@blackgirlburnoutSubscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.comWatch the episode on YouTubeDrop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.STAY IN TOUCHJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.OUR SPONSORSCheck out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Pharmanutra: pharmanutra-us.comSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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  • Opt Into Joy-First Productivity: Why Pleasure is the Power You’ve Been Denying Yourself
    In this powerful episode of Black Girl Burnout, Kelley invites us to radically rethink how we approach productivity. For generations, Black women have been conditioned to believe that joy must be earned—that rest comes only after the grind. But what if that belief is not only outdated, but harmful?Through personal stories, science-backed insights, and cultural truth-telling, Kelley introduces us to dopamine anchoring, a technique that helps you pair joy with effort to create ease, motivation, and emotional safety. This isn’t about tricking yourself—it’s about healing yourself. It’s time to opt out of burnout and into a life where joy leads.Key Takeaways:Willpower is not your problem—depleted dopamine is. Chronic stress disrupts your motivation, making “push through” productivity unsustainable.Black women have been sold a lie: grind now, rest later. That mindset leads to burnout, not breakthroughs.Dopamine anchoring can rewire your brain for joyful productivity. Pairing pleasurable activities with hard tasks helps you create new habits grounded in ease.Pleasure is not a distraction—it’s a resistance tool. Choosing joy is a radical act of self-preservation and cultural healing.Episode Highlights + Timestamps[00:01:00] – Calling Out the Willpower MythKelley breaks down how the brain’s chemistry—not mindset alone—determines our motivation. Willpower doesn’t stand a chance when dopamine is depleted.[00:06:00] – A Personal Story of Burnout and BetrayalKelley shares her journey of grinding in her twenties and thirties, achieving professional “success,” but still feeling depleted, overlooked, and disrespected.[00:14:51] – What is Dopamine Anchoring?A clear, simple explanation of this practice: pairing joyful sensations with difficult tasks to build sustainable motivation and safety in the nervous system.[00:23:00] – Three Practical Anchor RitualsKelley offers a sensory anchor, a connection anchor, and a celebration anchor—three gentle rituals you can try today to reclaim joy and make work feel softer.Support the ShowAre you experimenting with new ways to rest? Whether it’s saying no to one more obligation, shutting your laptop at 5 p.m., or taking a slow walk with no agenda, capture that moment of ease. Share it with us:@blackgirlburnoutSubscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.comWatch the episode on YouTubeDrop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.Stay In TouchJoin our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.Our Sponsors:Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out SideralXL for your Iron needs: https://pharmanutra-us.com/Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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  • Opt Into Getting Your Life Together—Gently
    In this episode of the Black Girl Burnout podcast, Kelley shares an honest check-in she calls The Getting My Life Together Toolkit. Instead of another rigid routine or “glow-up” plan, she offers the small, sustaining habits and mindset shifts that are actually helping her through life’s “life-ing.” From soft structure and nervous system routines to practical self-care rituals, Kelley invites you to build your own toolkit—one rooted in gentleness, intention, and capacity, not perfection.KEY TAKEAWAYSStructure can be soft. Create routines that support you—not drain you—by honoring your real capacity, not your ambition.Habits can soothe your nervous system. Small grounding rituals like making your bed, dressing intentionally, and setting calm boundaries bring steadiness to your days.Dress for the energy you want. Even when working from home, wearing real clothes can signal self-respect and shift your mindset.Protect your peace before bed. Limiting dysregulating content at night helps your nervous system unwind and deepens rest.EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS[00:00–03:00] A Real-Life Check-In: Kelley explains why she’s naming this season her “Getting My Life Together Toolkit” and shares what inspired it.[03:00–07:00] The Type A Recovery Plan: How she’s learning to make to-do lists that honor capacity rather than overachievement.[07:00–11:00] Nervous System Habits That Stick: From making her bed to red-light therapy, Kelley shares small routines that make her mornings calmer.[11:00–17:00] Dressing for Your Day: How shifting from hoodies to cozy two-piece sets has changed her energy and self-respect.[17:00–22:00] Protecting Peace at Night: Why she no longer watches intense or “dysregulating” shows after 7 p.m., and how it’s improving her sleep and calm.[22:00–28:00] Building Your Own Toolkit: Kelley invites listeners to reflect on what’s actually helping them through and share their own soft lock-in routines.YOUR TURNTake a few minutes today to build your own Getting My Life Together Toolkit.Write down 3 small things—habits, tools, or mindset shifts—that help you feel more grounded or capable right now.Then, share one of them with us on social media using #BlackGirlBurnout.Your toolkit doesn’t have to be perfect—just supportive. That’s the real goal.SUPPORT THE SHOWAre you stepping into a “Summer of No”? Whether you’re canceling plans for rest, setting fresh boundaries, or saying no to what drains you, you don’t owe anyone guilt. Take a moment this week to capture what freedom looks like for you. Snap a pic or video of your joy and tag us:📱 @blackgirlburnout📧 Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com📺 Watch the episode on YouTube💌 Show some love—don’t let Kelley’s mama be the only one dropping hearts!STAY IN TOUCHWant more ways to connect with the Black Girl Burnout community?Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.Become a paid Substack subscriber ($8/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources and tools to support your burnout-free life.OUR SPONSORSCheck out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGBCheck out Homeaglow: https://homeaglow.com/BGBSavvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/Advertising Inquiries: RedCirclePrivacy & Opt-Out: RedCircleOur Sponsors:* Check out Green Chef: https://greenchef.com/50BGB* Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
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About Black Girl Burnout

Black Girl Burnout is a podcast uniquely tailored for black women that guides you from burnout to joy and abundance. Tune in three times a week for 20-minute or less episodes brimming with actionable tips, empowering personal stories, and transformative perspectives. Join us on a journey filled with liberation, celebration, community, and joy.
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