Black Girl Burnout

What does it look like to pursue ambition without abandoning yourself in the process?
In this powerful conversation, Kelley sits down with Sarah Boyd, founder of The Formation, to discuss how Black women can navigate workplace challenges while protecting their wellbeing. Together, they unpack extraction culture, invisible labor, workplace boundaries, self-advocacy, and the difference between excellence and self-sacrifice. Sarah shares practical tools for making your contributions visible, reclaiming your voice, and building a career that supports the life you actually want to live.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Excellence should never require self-betrayal. When your success consistently comes at the expense of your boundaries, you've likely moved from excellence into extraction.
Visibility isn't about proving your worth. It's about confidently documenting, communicating, and standing on the value you've already created.
Your career should support your life. Sustainable ambition starts with defining the life you want and making career decisions that align with it.
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & TIMESTAMPS
06:42 — Making Invisible Labor Visible
Sarah explains why documenting your contributions is essential and how Black women can advocate for their work without feeling like they're proving their worth.
22:18 — The Difference Between Excellence and Extraction
A powerful discussion about boundaries, overwork, and recognizing when workplace expectations have crossed the line into harmful extraction.
39:55 — Why Your Career Should Fuel Your Life
Sarah shares how shifting from "What can I give my job?" to "What does my job give me?" can transform your relationship with work.
57:40 — Building Joyful Resilience and Reclaiming Ambition
The conversation explores how Black women can pursue success, protect their peace, and create careers rooted in abundance rather than survival.
A GENTLE INVITATION
Before starting your next workweek, take ten minutes to reflect on this question:
Is your current approach to work helping you build the life you want—or simply helping you survive your job?
Write down one boundary you need to strengthen and one contribution you want to make more visible this month. Small shifts in self-advocacy can create more space for both success and wellbeing.
SUPPORT THE SHOW
Like, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout.
Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time.
STAY IN TOUCH
Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.
Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops.
OUR SPONSORS
Super.com: Visit Super.com for more details.
Sista Afya Community Care: www.sistaafya.com
Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Last week, Kelley shared that she had entered a season of thawing—a period of finally feeling safe enough to stop bracing for impact. This week, she returns with an unexpected discovery: healing hasn't brought certainty. Instead, it has brought questions.
Drawing inspiration from Zora Neale Hurston's reminder that "there are years that ask questions and years that answer," Kelley reflects on the deeper inquiries emerging in this season of her life. From reconsidering what she truly needs to thrive to redefining what she wants to be proud of, she explores the difference between performing healing and integrating it. Through personal stories, field notes, and honest observations, this episode offers a glimpse into what happens when you stop chasing answers and start listening to yourself.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Healing isn't always about finding answers—it can be about learning to ask better questions.
Thriving requires honoring what you actually need, not what you've been taught should make you happy or successful.
Integration matters more than performance. Becoming whole is different from appearing healed.
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & TIMESTAMPS
04:56 – The Paris Question That Changed Everything
Kelley shares the moment she realized that authenticity, creativity, and passion mattered more to her than the dream she had spent years pursuing.
12:42 – What Do You Want to Be Proud Of?
A reflection on moving beyond external achievement and redefining success based on the quality of your life, not just what you produce.
20:31 – What People Think of Me Is None of My Business
Kelley unpacks one of her most important field notes from this season and explores the freedom that comes from releasing the burden of others' opinions.
31:47 – Becoming Reachable to Yourself Again
A powerful closing reflection on thawing, healing, and the realization that growth may not be about becoming someone new—but returning to yourself.
A GENTLE INVITATION
This week, choose one question instead of searching for one answer.
Ask yourself: What do I actually need to thrive right now?
Resist the urge to solve everything at once. Write down whatever comes up, even if it's incomplete. Sometimes healing isn't found in certainty. Sometimes it's found in creating enough space to hear yourself tell the truth.
If this episode resonated with you, consider sharing it with someone who may be navigating their own season of questions. You don't have to have everything figured out to keep moving forward. Sometimes curiosity is enough.
SUPPORT THE SHOW
Like, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout.
Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time.
STAY IN TOUCH
Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.
Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops.
OUR SPONSORS
Super.com: Visit Super.com for more details.
Sista Afya Community Care: www.sistaafya.com
Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this Mental Health Month bonus episode, Kelley sits down with Ashlee Edwards, founder and CEO of MindRight, to discuss community-centered mental health support for Black women. Together, they explore why healing shouldn’t begin only in crisis, how community care helps protect our capacity for joy, and what it looks like to build more human-centered systems of support through technology, intention, and connection.
Key Takeaways
Mental health support should begin before burnout or crisis, not only after things fall apart.
Community care is a powerful tool for healing, resilience, and protecting Black women from systems that demand overextension.
Technology can support emotional wellness when it is used to deepen human connection rather than replace it.
Episode Highlights & Timestamps
00:01 – Why Black women deserve support before the “crash-out”
Kelley and Ashlee discuss shifting mental health care from crisis intervention to everyday support and community care.
05:20 – Protecting our capacity for joy
Ashlee shares why conversations about mental health must include intergenerational wisdom, joy, and abundance—not just trauma.
11:17 – Can technology support healing without replacing humanity?
A nuanced conversation about AI, trust, emotional support, and why MindRight prioritizes real humans on the other side of the screen.
23:00 – What joy looks like in practice
Ashlee reflects on spirituality, nature, intentional living, and the decisions she makes to actively protect her wellbeing.
Gentle Invitation
This week, consider one small way you can support your emotional wellbeing before you reach exhaustion. Maybe that looks like asking for support, spending time near something that grounds you, or letting yourself receive care instead of always being the one giving it. The goal isn’t perfection—it’s consistency and remembering that staying human is the work.
Connect with Ashlee Edwards
Instagram: @IYA_Ashlee
MindRight Website: MindRight
Text MindRight for support: Text 886-886
Learn more about MindRight’s community-centered emotional support platform for Black communities and Black women.
Support the Show
Like, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout.
Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time.
Stay in Touch
Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.
Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops.
Our Sponsors
Super.com: Visit Super.com for more details.
Savvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/
Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Sometimes grief doesn’t look like falling apart — sometimes it looks like becoming incredibly productive. In this episode, Kelley reflects on the realization that she had been producing healing instead of actually experiencing it, and how years of survival mode, caregiving, medical trauma, and loss shaped her relationship to grief. Through personal storytelling and thoughtful reflection, she explores how Black women are often culturally rewarded for over-functioning while quietly disconnecting from themselves emotionally.
This conversation is an invitation to recognize the difference between narrating healing and truly inhabiting it. Kelley also introduces the idea of “the thaw” — the slow process of returning to yourself after prolonged survival mode — and shares why softness, embodiment, and emotional honesty matter now more than ever.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Grief doesn’t always look emotional — sometimes it looks like productivity, over-functioning, and survival mode.
Many Black women are taught to intellectualize pain and keep moving instead of fully feeling and processing loss.
Healing may begin not with becoming “better,” but with becoming reachable to yourself again.
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS & TIMESTAMPS
00:01:00 — When Productivity Becomes a Mask for Grief
Kelley explores the realization that she had been “producing healing” instead of fully experiencing it and reflects on the pressure to turn pain into purpose too quickly.
00:05:00 — The Three Books That Cracked Everything Open
A conversation about art, grief, emotional release, and the moment Kelley realized how long it had been since she truly allowed herself to feel.
00:11:20 — Survival Mode, Trauma, and the Black Woman Freeze Response
Kelley shares the cascade of events from the last several years — illness, caregiving, business instability, and loss — and how prolonged survival mode can disconnect us from ourselves emotionally.
00:19:00 — What “The Thaw” Looks Like
Kelley introduces the beginning of her thawing process: slowing down, reconnecting to her body, and learning how to return to herself gently after years of bracing for impact.
A GENTLE INVITATION
Take a moment this week to ask yourself:
Where have I been over-functioning instead of truly feeling?
Maybe your nervous system has been protecting you. Maybe the numbness isn’t failure — maybe it’s survival. Give yourself permission to slow down long enough to notice what your body, heart, or spirit might be trying to say.
And if this episode resonated with you, share it with another Black woman who may need the reminder that healing doesn’t have to be optimized to be real.
SUPPORT THE SHOW
Like, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout.
Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time.
STAY IN TOUCH
Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.
Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops.
OUR SPONSORS
Super.com: Visit Super.com for more details.
Savvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/
Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Kelley is joined by political analyst, writer, and speaker Zerlina Maxwell for a powerful conversation about visibility, truth-telling, and navigating the pressure of being a Black woman in public spaces. Together, they explore the emotional toll of constantly having to prove yourself, the importance of boundaries, and what it means to remain grounded while living and working in highly demanding environments.
Zerlina shares reflections on ambition, identity, and protecting your peace while still pursuing meaningful work. This conversation is an honest reminder that you do not have to abandon yourself in order to be impactful, successful, or seen.
Key Takeaways
Visibility comes with emotional weight. Being seen and heard—especially as a Black woman—often carries pressure, scrutiny, and exhaustion that require intentional care.
Boundaries protect your humanity. Rest, limits, and stepping back are necessary practices for sustainability, not signs of weakness.
You can pursue impact without self-abandonment. Success and meaningful work do not have to come at the expense of your well-being.
Episode Highlights
03:08 – Navigating Public Life as a Black Woman
Zerlina reflects on the challenges of visibility, criticism, and existing authentically in high-pressure spaces.
07:42 – The Pressure to Constantly Prove Yourself
A deeper discussion about overperformance, perfectionism, and the emotional labor many Black women carry in professional environments.
14:19 – Protecting Your Peace With Boundaries
Kelley and Zerlina explore the importance of rest, emotional boundaries, and creating sustainable rhythms while doing impactful work.
21:37 – Redefining Success Beyond Exhaustion
A closing reflection on choosing fulfillment, alignment, and self-preservation over constant striving and burnout.
A Gentle Invitation
If this episode resonated, take a moment to reflect on where you may be overextending yourself in order to feel worthy, successful, or accepted. Consider one boundary or act of self-preservation that could support you this week.
Listen to the full episode, share it with someone navigating pressure or visibility fatigue, and leave a review if this conversation supported you. Choosing yourself alongside your ambitions is part of building a life rooted in sustainability, care, and truth.
Connect with Zerlina
Radio Show: Mornings with Zerlina Maxwell
Instagram: @ZerlinaMaxwell
Substack: Inner Work Dispatch (available wherever books are sold)
Support the Show
Like, follow, and subscribe across all platforms. Find us @blackgirlburnout.
Subscribe to our newsletter at blackgirlburnout.com. Watch on YouTube. Drop a review — your words make a real difference, and they warm Kelley's whole heart every single time.
Stay in Touch
Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.
Become a paid subscriber ($8/month) for exclusive resources and monthly workshops.
Our Sponsors
Savvy Ladies Free Financial Helpline: https://www.savvyladies.org/
Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle | Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Super.com and use my code super.com/credit for a great deal: https://super.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy