You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for the Adult Children of Parents with Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorders

Too many cycle breakers know that moment when your phone lights up with the latest family emergency and you drop everything to try to calm the storm.
When you grow up with a narcissistic parent or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, you learn early on that keeping the peace is what keeps you safe. So, when there's a crisis, of course you spring into action.
In this episode we dive into:
The difference between what you're capable of and what you actually have the capacity for
The cost of being designated the family fixer
The "I should be able to handle this" story, and how it keeps you stuck in burnout and self-blame
One honest question to ask yourself this week that brings real clarity to how you spend your time, energy, and resources
Ready to go deeper?
The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself.
Learn more and get started: confidentboundaries.com/vault
Want the more episodes of You're Not Crazy? Join The Private Feed for access to bonus and ad-free episodes plus the full archive: confidentboundaries.com/private
Follow Torie on Instagram: @cyclebreakertherapist
Follow Torie on TikTok: @cyclebreakertherapist
Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck
Learn what actually gets in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: confidentboundaries.com/opt-in
Support the show
A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors!
Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline.
You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

When grow up with a toxic parent, Father's Day isn't an exciting celebration. It's a loaded weekend that sits heavy on your nervous system.
And it's why the week leading up to it can leave you feeling completely drained before you even get to the main event.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why the week before and after Father's Day can feel just as heavy as the day itself
How to make an intentional choice about your scrolling instead of letting it quietly wreck your week
A self-compassion practice that's as simple as checking in with how you're actually doing
A tip for sorting through your real options when there's no perfect choice about calling, visiting, or gifting
The difference between a decision that protects your well-being and one that's only about keeping other people from being upset with you
If you've spent your whole life deciding it's easier to sacrifice yourself than to risk disappointing your family, this episode is for you.
Ready to go deeper?
The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself.
Learn more and get started: confidentboundaries.com/vault
Follow Torie on Instagram: @cyclebreakertherapist
Follow Torie on TikTok: @cyclebreakertherapist
Get access to bonus content and the entire archive of episodes when you subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed: confidentboundaries.com/private 
Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck
If your boundaries keep blowing up or leaving you drowning in guilt, it's usually not you. Learn what problems actually get in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: confidentboundaries.com/opt-in
Support the show
A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors!
Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline.
You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

When you set a boundary with a narcissistic parent, or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, they tend to push back by acting like they don't get it. They argue, they question whether your boundary is even reasonable, they pull you into a debate about whether you should have it at all. 
It's why these conversations so often end with you backing down, second-guessing yourself, and wondering if you were the unreasonable one all along.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why a parent like this pretends not to understand your boundary, and what they're actually doing when they pull you into the back and forth
The difference between setting a boundary and asking for permission, and why only one of those is your job
The "side quest" trap, where the whole conversation quietly shifts from your boundary to getting them to approve of it
What a healthy parent is able to do that yours likely can't, and why that gap isn't something you can close by trying harder
How to get clear on your boundary before you ever bring it to them, so you're not improvising under pressure
Ready to go deeper?
The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself.
Learn more and get started: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/vault
Follow Torie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist
Follow Torie on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist
Free guide: 10 Boundary Mistakes That Keep You Stuck
If your boundaries keep blowing up or leaving you drowning in guilt, it's usually not you. Learn what problems actually get in the way of setting successful boundaries with toxic parents by downloading my free guide: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/opt-in
Support the show
A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors!
Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline.
You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

You finally set the boundary and for about five seconds you felt proud of yourself. Then your parent pushed back and wished you could take it all back.
When you have a parent with narcissistic or unmanaged borderline personality disorder, boundaries don't land the way you were taught they would. 
These types of parents are emotionally dysregulated, rely on you to manage their feelings, and read your boundary as a threat. 
It's why so many cycle breakers quietly decide boundaries just don't work for them, when the truth is nobody ever taught them the second half of the process.
In this episode you'll learn:
What a boundary actually is
Why the same boundary lands fine with an emotionally mature person and is a complete disaster with a parent who has BPD or narcissistic traits
Why setting the boundary is only half the work
The piece that finally makes your boundaries stick
Ready to go deeper?
The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself. 
Learn more and get started at confidentboundaries.com/vault
Get access to bonus content and the entire archive of episodes when you subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private
Follow Torie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist
Follow Torie on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist
Support the show
A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors!
Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline.
You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.

That moment where your brain short circuits because your parent just looked you dead in the eye and insisted the situation you’re describing never happened at all. 
When you grow up with a narcissistic parent or a parent with unmanaged borderline personality disorder, gaslighting isn't just a buzzword you read about on Reddit. It's the ever present way your parent avoids taking responsibility for their actions. 
And it's why, as an adult, you can sit across from someone you love, know exactly what they did, and still walk away wondering if you're the one who got it wrong.
In this episode you'll learn:
What gaslighting actually is
The difference between an emotionally immature parent, a narcissistic parent, and a parent with BPD when it comes to gaslighting
Why your brain literally cannot make sense of someone calmly insisting a shared event didn't happen, and what it does to cope
How chronic gaslighting turns into long-term self-doubt that gets in your way of breaking the cycle
If you've spent your whole life worried you might be the dramatic one, the sensitive one, the one who remembers things wrong, this episode is for you.
The Cycle Breaker's Vault is Torie's self-guided course for the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic traits. It covers dysfunctional family dynamics, boundaries, manipulation, grief, and reconnecting with yourself.
Learn more and get started at confidentboundaries.com/vault.
Get access to bonus content and the entire archive of episodes when you subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed: https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private 
Follow Torie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist 
Follow Torie on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist
Support the show
A huge thank you to our podcast sponsors!
Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in crisis, please call the 988 Crisis Lifeline.
You're Not Crazy is owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.