You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic Parents

When you spend your childhood being misunderstood, projected onto, or told who you are instead of being seen for who you actually are, it makes sense that you carry that fear of being misunderstood into adulthood.

In this episode, I talk about:

• Why adult children of narcissistic parents often overexplain themselves

• What it feels like to grow up being constantly misunderstood

• Why this pattern tends to show up more when you’re overwhelmed or depleted

• What real healing actually looks like when these habits still pop up

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In this episode, we explore:

Why guilt feels so overwhelming for adult children of emotionally immature and narcissistic parents

How dysfunctional family systems train you to equate guilt with being a bad person

The difference between healthy guilt and manipulative guilt

Why avoiding guilt keeps you stuck in the toxic cycle

How to approach difficult decisions without avoiding or agreeing to things beyond your capacity

Learning to sit with guilt instead of immediately jumping into avoidance or problem-solving mode is a skill that many of us cycle breakers were never taught. Listen to this episode to learn more about building the healthy skills necessary to confidently navigate guilt as a cycle breaker.
Support the podcast + get bonus episodes:

Join You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed to support the growth of the show and get access to bonus episodes, the entire archive, and ad-free new episodes each week! Join here:

https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

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If you grew up with a parent who had narcissistic or borderline traits, you may have heard this when you started setting boundaries, going to therapy, or naming the dysfunction in your family.

In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, we unpack:

Why “walking on eggshells” is not the same thing in a parent-child relationship

The lifelong power imbalance that doesn’t magically disappear when you turn 18

Why toxic parents often say this when you stop being compliant

How this narrative twists reality and creates a false “both sides” story

The subtle gaslighting behind “I have to walk on eggshells around you, too”

When a parent says this, it often isn’t about your behavior. It’s about their discomfort with accountability. It’s about losing control of a dynamic where you were expected to stay small, agreeable, and emotionally accommodating.

If you’ve started therapy, begun setting boundaries with a toxic parent, or noticed pushback when you stop playing your assigned role in the family, this episode will help you understand what’s actually happening.

Support the growth of the show and get access to bonus content by joining You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed. 

Plus, you'll get ad-free versions of all new episodes when you join:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

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In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, therapist and boundaries coach Torie Wiksell breaks down common behaviors that toxic families often label as “normal,” but that are actually deeply damaging and abusive. We talk about why these dynamics are so confusing, why they impact you as deeply as they do, and why your reactions are not a personal flaw.

You’ll learn:

Why emotional and psychological abuse in families is often minimized or dismissed

How power and control shape parent-child dynamics, even in adulthood

Why stonewalling, silent treatment, shaming, and gaslighting are not “just family stuff”

How abuse creates confusion, self-doubt, and emotional exhaustion over time

How naming abuse accurately can be a powerful step toward clarity and healing

If you’ve ever questioned whether it was “really that bad,” struggled to trust your own emotional reactions, or felt drawn to content about toxic parents while doubting your experience, this episode offers grounding, validation, and context.
Love the podcast? Support the show (and get access to bonus content)

Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and access to archived episodes by joining You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed.

https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Schedule a Therapy Phone Consultation

If you’re interested in talking about working with Torie in therapy, use the following link to schedule a free phone consultation. Must be located in CA, OR, or WA.

https://toriewikselltherapy.com/schedule

If this episode was helpful, please leave a five-star review to help other cycle breakers find the show.

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In this episode of You're Not Crazy, I walk through the most common reasons boundaries fail with narcissistic, emotionally immature, and toxic parents. Not because you did it wrong, but because most people are taught a version of boundaries that doesn’t account for manipulation, emotional dysregulation, guilt, or the survival responses cycle breakers carry into adulthood.

We talk about:

-Why using the word “boundary” often backfires with toxic parents

-What a boundary actually is (and why it’s about your behavior, not controlling theirs)

-How toxic parents escalate when they feel dysregulated or lose access to you

-Why guilt, panic, and urgency show up after you set limits

-How not enforcing a boundary teaches your parent to push harder

-Why boundaries without an enforcement plan almost always collapse

This episode is especially for adults who intellectually understand boundaries but still find themselves caving when their parent panics, guilt-trips, or emotionally escalates. If you’ve ever thought, “I know what I should do, but I can’t seem to follow through,” this conversation will give you clarity and language for what’s really happening.

This is also why boundary work with toxic parents requires more than scripts or one-off advice. It requires understanding the family system, the manipulation tactics, and your own nervous system responses so you can follow through without self-abandoning.

And if you want access to more episodes of the podcast, sign up for You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed. You'll be supporting the growth of the show while getting access to archived, bonus, and ad-free episodes of You're Not Crazy:
confidentboundaries.com/private 

If this episode helped put words to something you’ve been struggling with, please leave a five-star review to help other cycle breakers find the show and feel less alone.

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