THE AUTISM ADHD PODCAST

The Small Language Shifts That Protect the Mental Health of Neurodivergent Kids
What if some of the most common words we use with autistic and ADHD children are actually creating confusion, shame, masking and self-doubt?
Words like:
• Respectful
• Responsible
• Pay attention
• Motivated
• Trustworthy
• Nice
• Confident and on and on
Most of us use these words every day without thinking twice. But for many neurodivergent children and teens, these words can feel vague, confusing, and impossible to understand.
When children don't know exactly what is expected of them, they aren't learning the skill we hope to teach. Instead, they may begin to believe they are constantly getting things wrong.
Over time, that misunderstanding can impact mental health, learning, and relationships.
In this episode, I'm covering why and how commonly used words cause damage and how small shifts in communication can create more clarity, connection, safety, and understanding.
In this episode, you'll discover:
✔ Why vague language creates confusion for autistic and ADHD children
✔ How words like "respectful," "responsible," and "motivated" can unintentionally hurt neurodivergent children
✔ The connection between communication, mental health, and emotional safety
✔ What many neurodivergent children are actually trying to communicate
✔ Specific language shifts that improve cooperation and understanding
Whether you're a parent, educator, therapist, psychologist, or someone who supports neurodivergent children and teens, this episode will help you communicate in ways that foster understanding instead of confusion and connection instead of shame.
Because the goal isn't to make neurodivergent kids guess what we mean.
The goal is to help them feel safe, understood, capable, and supported.
If this episode resonates with you, please share it with another parent, educator, therapist, or psychologist who supports autistic and ADHD children and teens:) Thanks for joining me for this episode, Holly Blanc Moses - The Mom/Neurodivergent Therapist
Check out these resources!
The 135 School Accommodations for Autistic & ADHD Students Guide is now available, including three detailed cases with accommodations for ONLY $27.95
What's Inside:
📚 Academic Supports (45 accommodations)
From pre-teaching strategies to assistive technology, the tools students need to access the curriculum without barriers
🎨 Sensory & Environmental Supports (22 accommodations)
Create a learning environment where your child can focus, regulate, and engage—not just survive
🧠 Executive Functioning & Self-Advocacy (24 accommodations)
Build the skills that will serve them for life—organization, time management, and speaking up for their needs
🤝 Social Supports (21 accommodations)
Turn recess and group work from nightmare to opportunity with structured, supportive approaches
💚 Mental Health & Emotional Regulation (23 accommodations)
Because learning can't happen when a child is overwhelmed, anxious, or in crisis
🌟 3 Detailed Student Examples With Individualized Accommodations
Plus:
✅ An example of each accommodation
✅ Tips on how to identify areas of need
✅ Free helpful education resources
Don't miss this opportunity to access 135 neurodiversity-affirming accommodations for only $27.95
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
➡️ Educators click here
Join me in my Facebook Groups!
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
Learn about my private practice - North Carolina Center for Autism and ADHD
🙋🏻‍♀️ Join me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube
Please leave a review! Your 5-star reviews help other families and professionals find The Autism ADHD Podcast. Thank you:)
About Holly Blanc Moses: Holly Blanc Moses is an AuDHD psychologist with 28 years of experience. She is a speaker, consultant, continuing education provider, and host of The Autism ADHD Podcast, Autism ADHD TV, and parent masterclasses.
About The Podcast
The Autism ADHD Podcast is for parents and professionals who want a neurodiversity-affirming approach to supporting autistic and ADHD children and teens — with a focus on emotional regulation, executive functioning, mental health, and connection.

I was in the hospital for seven days recently.
Scared. Exhausted. Completely out of control of what was happening to my body.
In the middle of all of it — a nurse walked in and asked if I wanted a blanket.
It sounds small. It wasn't.
Because in that moment, someone was asking what I needed. And I couldn't stop thinking about how rarely that happens... especially for neurodivergent kids.
We tell them to use their words. We say, "Come to me before it gets to be too much." But when they do — when they say it's too loud, the clothes are itchy, I can't handle the cafeteria — too often what follows is a sigh, an eye roll, a "you'll be fine."
They learn to say they're fine. They mask harder. They stop coming to us.
This episode is about one simple, radical thing we can do differently. Ask. And then really listen.
I'll share what this looks like in real life — real examples — and what to do when your child, student or client says "I'm fine" or "I don't care" (because that's also a sign). 
❤️ Holly, The Mom/Neurodivergent Therapist
P.S. I've got more goodness for you! 🥁🥁🥁🥁 
The 135 School Accommodations for Autistic & ADHD Students Guide is now available, including three detailed cases with accommodations for ONLY $27.95
What's Inside:
📚 Academic Supports (45 accommodations)
From pre-teaching strategies to assistive technology, the tools students need to access the curriculum without barriers
🎨 Sensory & Environmental Supports (22 accommodations)
Create a learning environment where your child can focus, regulate, and engage—not just survive
🧠 Executive Functioning & Self-Advocacy (24 accommodations)
Build the skills that will serve them for life—organization, time management, and speaking up for their needs
🤝 Social Supports (21 accommodations)
Turn recess and group work from nightmare to opportunity with structured, supportive approaches
💚 Mental Health & Emotional Regulation (23 accommodations)
Because learning can't happen when a child is overwhelmed, anxious, or in crisis
🌟 3 Detailed Student Examples With Individualized Accommodations
Plus:
✅ An example of each accommodation
✅ Tips on how to identify areas of need
✅ Free helpful education resources
Don't miss this opportunity to access 135 neurodiversity-affirming accommodations for only $27.95
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
➡️ Educators click here
Join me in my Facebook Groups!
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
Learn about my private practice - North Carolina Center for Autism and ADHD
🙋🏻‍♀️ Join me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube
Please leave a review! Your 5-star reviews help other families and professionals find The Autism ADHD Podcast. Thank you:)
About Holly Blanc Moses: Holly Blanc Moses is an AuDHD psychologist with 28 years of experience. She is a speaker, consultant, continuing education provider, and host of The Autism ADHD Podcast, Autism ADHD TV, and parent masterclasses.
About The Podcast
The Autism ADHD Podcast is for parents and professionals who want a neurodiversity-affirming approach to supporting autistic and ADHD children and teens — with a focus on emotional regulation, executive functioning, mental health, and connection.

This episode is deeply personal.
Today, I'm sharing a part of my story that I've hidden for a very long time. 
Elizabeth Le Forest is walking with me through painful topics such as anxiety, perfectionism, chronic illness, masking, people pleasing, burnout, and what happens when a neurodivergent person spends their life trying to prove they are worthy of love, belonging, and support.
For years, I wore a heavy mask.
I learned to push through it all with a smile 
Rejection
Exhaustion
Pain.
Fear.
Overwhelm.
I learned to disconnect from my body and my needs because somewhere along the way, I absorbed the message that who I naturally was wasn't "acceptable."
So I kept trying to prove that I wasn't:
"lazy"
"bad"
"selfish"
"annoying"
"weird"
"stupid"
"a brat"
"dramatic"
I spent years chasing scraps of approval, hoping that if I achieved enough…
helped enough…
worked hard enough…
pushed through enough…
maybe I'd finally be "good enough."
Meanwhile, my body was breaking down.
I pushed myself far beyond my limits and it almost killed me 
This conversation is vulnerable, emotional, and honest.
If you are parenting an autistic or ADHD child…
if you support neurodivergent kids and teens professionally…
or if you are a neurodivergent adult who has spent your life trying to prove you are enough…
I need you to hear this:
Autistic and neurodivergent children need to be deeply loved, supported, protected, and reminded of their value exactly as they are because they are growing up in a world that constantly tells them they are wrong.
Too sensitive.
Too emotional.
Too loud.
Too weird
Too annoying and on and on
Children absorb those messages.
And when they spend years believing they have to earn love and belonging by masking, overachieving, people pleasing, and ignoring their own needs, the cost is dangerous
You do not have to destroy yourself to prove your value.
You were never supposed to spend your life chasing scraps of approval.
And I hope this episode reminds you that your needs matter too.
You are valuable. You always have been and you always will be.
❤️ Holly, The Mom/Neurodivergent Therapist
P.S. I've got more goodness for you! 🥁🥁🥁🥁 
The 135 School Accommodations for Autistic & ADHD Students Guide is now available, including three detailed cases with accommodations for ONLY $27.95
What's Inside:
📚 Academic Supports (45 accommodations)
From pre-teaching strategies to assistive technology, the tools students need to access the curriculum without barriers
🎨 Sensory & Environmental Supports (22 accommodations)
Create a learning environment where your child can focus, regulate, and engage—not just survive
🧠 Executive Functioning & Self-Advocacy (24 accommodations)
Build the skills that will serve them for life—organization, time management, and speaking up for their needs
🤝 Social Supports (21 accommodations)
Turn recess and group work from nightmare to opportunity with structured, supportive approaches
💚 Mental Health & Emotional Regulation (23 accommodations)
Because learning can't happen when a child is overwhelmed, anxious, or in crisis
Plus:
✅ An example of each accommodation
✅ 3 detailed cases along with accommodations
✅ Tips on how to identify areas of need
✅ Free helpful education resources
Don't miss this opportunity to access 135 neurodiversity-affirming accommodations for only $27.95
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
➡️ Educators click here
Join me in my Facebook Groups!
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
Learn about my private practice - North Carolina Center for Autism and ADHD
🙋🏻‍♀️ Join me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube
Please leave a review! Your 5-star reviews help other families and professionals find The Autism ADHD Podcast. Thank you:)
Thanks to Elizabeth Le Forest for interviewing me for this important episode! Elizabeth only has a few 1:1 spots available for her Sacred Creatrix program. This program is for neurodivergent women who are healers, creatives or moms. Inside this dedicated container, clients get the high-level, customized support to heal and expand their nervous system so they finally feel safe enough to be fully present in their body, show up as their most vibrantly authentic self, and shift into sustainable alignment in every area of their life. Click here to learn about the program!
About Holly Blanc Moses: Holly Blanc Moses is an AuDHD psychologist with 28 years of experience. She is a speaker, consultant, continuing education provider, and host of The Autism ADHD Podcast, Autism ADHD TV, and parent masterclasses.
About The Podcast
The Autism ADHD Podcast is for parents and professionals who want a neurodiversity-affirming approach to supporting autistic and ADHD children and teens — with a focus on emotional regulation, executive functioning, mental health, and connection.

If you've ever felt that gut punch…
The side eye.
The comment.
The subtle (or not so subtle) message that your child is "too much"…
or that you're somehow getting it wrong as a parent…
I get it!
In this episode of The Autism ADHD Podcast, I'm talking about something that so many parents and therapists experience… but we don't talk about enough:
The "good kid / bad kid" narrative
The "they were raised right" comments
And the damage this causes for autistic and ADHD kids — and their families
This episode was inspired by two real-life moments that happened just days apart… and they both reminded me how deeply rooted these beliefs are in our society.
Here's what we dive into:
Why behavior is often misunderstood (and what's actually underneath it)
How neurological differences are mistaken for "bad behavior"
Why shame is NOT a teaching tool (and what it actually does)
The emotional toll on parents of autistic and ADHD children
How masking develops — and why it can be dangerous
Why families begin to withdraw and isolate
The invisible, extraordinary work of neurodivergent parenting
This episode is for you if:
You're parenting an autistic or ADHD child and feel judged or misunderstood
You're a therapist, counselor, or psychologist supporting neurodivergent kids
You've ever wondered why your child's behavior doesn't "match" expectations
You're trying to understand meltdowns, shutdowns, and emotional regulation
You want a neurodiversity-affirming approach
You are going to LOVE this episode:)
Sincerely, Holly Blanc Moses, The Mom/Neurodivergent Therapist
P.S. I've got more goodness for you! 🥁🥁🥁🥁 
The 135 School Accommodations for Autistic & ADHD Students Guide is now available, including three detailed cases with accommodations for ONLY $27.95
What's Inside:
📚 Academic Supports (45 accommodations)
From pre-teaching strategies to assistive technology, the tools students need to access the curriculum without barriers
🎨 Sensory & Environmental Supports (22 accommodations)
Create a learning environment where your child can focus, regulate, and engage—not just survive
🧠 Executive Functioning & Self-Advocacy (24 accommodations)
Build the skills that will serve them for life—organization, time management, and speaking up for their needs
🤝 Social Supports (21 accommodations)
Turn recess and group work from nightmare to opportunity with structured, supportive approaches
💚 Mental Health & Emotional Regulation (23 accommodations)
Because learning can't happen when a child is overwhelmed, anxious, or in crisis
Plus:
✅ An example of each accommodation
✅ 3 detailed cases along with accommodations
✅ Tips on how to identify areas of need
✅ Free helpful education resources
Don't miss this opportunity to access 135 neurodiversity-affirming accommodations for only $27.95
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
➡️ Educators click here
Join me in my Facebook Groups!
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
Learn about my private practice - North Carolina Center for Autism and ADHD
🙋🏻‍♀️ Join me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube
Please leave a review! Your 5-star reviews help other families and professionals find The Autism ADHD Podcast. Thank you:)
About Holly Blanc Moses: Holly Blanc Moses is an AuDHD psychologist with 28 years of experience. She is a speaker, consultant, continuing education provider, and host of The Autism ADHD Podcast, Autism ADHD TV, and parent masterclasses.
 
About the Podcast
The Autism ADHD Podcast is for parents and professionals who want a neurodiversity-affirming approach to supporting autistic and ADHD children and teens — with a focus on emotional regulation, executive functioning, mental health, and connection.

I want to start with something I say to burned-out moms — and I mean it every single time I say it: Your burnout makes sense. Not the kind of "makes sense" that's just being nice. The kind that means there is a real, biological, neurological explanation for why you feel the way you feel. And it started long before you became a mom. That's a nervous system that was already running on empty — and finally hit its limit.
In this episode, I'm joined by Elizabeth LeForest — AuDHD somatic coach, trauma-informed practitioner, and someone who has lived this from the inside out. We go deep, and parts of this conversation hit very close to home for me personally.
What we talk about in this episode:
Why neurodivergent moms are often already at their nervous system limit before motherhood even begins 
What the burnout cycle actually looks like for neurodivergent women  
The cascade effect: how chronic nervous system activation starts to affect your physical health, and why so many neurodivergent women end up with chronic illness, POTS, GI issues, fatigue, and pain that nobody can fully explain
Why co-regulation with your autistic or ADHD child is nearly impossible when you've never experienced it yourself — and what to do about it
The brain-body disconnect: why so many neurodivergent women stop trusting their bodies from a very young age — and what healing that actually looks like
The intergenerational piece — why we end up saying the same things to our kids that were said to us, even when we desperately don't want to, and how to change the default setting
Why anxiety in neurodivergent women is often a symptom of nervous system dysfunction — not a life sentence — and what Elizabeth sees happen when the nervous system actually heals
What "rest and digest" is supposed to feel like — and why so many of us have never actually experienced it
What happens to unprocessed emotions in your body, and why closing them changes everything — including your memory, your energy, and your mental load
Why this work is in service to your child
This episode is for you if:
You're a mom of autistic or ADHD kids who is burned out, exhausted, and wondering why nothing you try ever feels like enough
You grew up neurodivergent — diagnosed or not — and were taught to push through, minimize your experience, and put everyone else first
You're a therapist or counselor supporting neurodivergent families, and you want to understand what's really happening in the nervous systems of the moms you work with
You've been told you have anxiety, depression, or chronic illness — and something in you has always wondered if there's more to the story  
Sincerely, Holly Blanc Moses, The Mom/Neurodivergent Therapist
P.S. I've got more goodness for you! 🥁🥁🥁🥁 
The 135 School Accommodations for Autistic & ADHD Students Guide is now available, including three detailed cases with accommodations for ONLY $27.95
What's Inside:
📚 Academic Supports (45 accommodations)
From pre-teaching strategies to assistive technology, the tools students need to access the curriculum without barriers
🎨 Sensory & Environmental Supports (22 accommodations)
Create a learning environment where your child can focus, regulate, and engage—not just survive
🧠 Executive Functioning & Self-Advocacy (24 accommodations)
Build the skills that will serve them for life—organization, time management, and speaking up for their needs
🤝 Social Supports (21 accommodations)
Turn recess and group work from nightmare to opportunity with structured, supportive approaches
💚 Mental Health & Emotional Regulation (23 accommodations)
Because learning can't happen when a child is overwhelmed, anxious, or in crisis
Plus:
✅ An example of each accommodation
✅ 3 detailed cases along with accommodations
✅ Tips on how to identify areas of need
✅ Free helpful education resources
Don't miss this opportunity to access 135 neurodiversity-affirming accommodations for only $27.95
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
➡️ Educators click here
Join me in my Facebook Groups!
➡️ Parents click here
➡️ Therapists click here
Learn about my private practice - North Carolina Center for Autism and ADHD
🙋🏻‍♀️ Join me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube
Please leave a review! Your 5-star reviews help other families and professionals find The Autism ADHD Podcast. Thank you:)
About Holly Blanc Moses: Holly Blanc Moses is an AuDHD psychologist with 28 years of experience. She is a speaker, consultant, continuing education provider, and host of The Autism ADHD Podcast, Autism ADHD TV, and parent masterclasses.
About Elizabeth LeForest: Elizabeth LeForest is an AuDHD somatic coach and trauma-informed practitioner who supports neurodivergent women navigating anxiety, burnout, and chronic illness. Her work blends lived experience with a nervous system-centered approach designed specifically for neurodivergent women who are ready to stop surviving and start building lives that actually work for them. If you are interested in working with Elizabeth, you can contact her here.