From suicidal throttle to strategic luck: Why depression became the greatest teacher and loneliness transformed into chosen solitude - and the brutal truth about the moment before ending it all, the difference between being lonely versus choosing to be alone, the press opportunity that changed everything without a strategy, and why conformity kills the human spirit while Africa's poverty-induced fear keeps people trapped in paths they never chose, missing out on the joy that only comes when you affirm your own spirit and say damn what everybody thinks.
In this raw segment of Konnected Minds, host Derrick Abaitey sits down with a guest who dismantles the dangerous "just push through depression" mentality keeping people ashamed of their darkest moments, revealing the exact instant when pressing the throttle instead of ending it all came down to pure luck - not strategy, not God necessarily, just luck that maybe had something to do with being an only child who didn't want to break his mother's heart. This isn't motivational mental health talk from Instagram therapists - it's a systematic breakdown of why the same physical experience of being alone can either destroy you or become your greatest source of peace depending on whether you're at peace with yourself, why getting the press without a strategy led to starting a show, leaving an entire industry, and becoming the happiest, wealthiest, and most comfortable ever, why true friends exist even when loneliness feels overwhelming - friends who would take care of your mother if anything happened, friends who keep your secrets even after a fight - and why understanding the difference between luck and strategic outcomes determines whether you sustain progress or lose everything when the next wave hits.
Critical revelations include:
The moment before ending it all: pressing the throttle and driving off instead of stopping - no conscious process, no clear reason, just luck (or God if you call it that) and maybe not wanting to break his mother's heart as an only child
Why depression saved his life: realizing the problem wasn't being alone, it was being unhappy inside - once that got sorted out, the same loneliness that made him sad became something he looked forward to
The transformation from loneliness to chosen solitude: when you're at peace with yourself, loneliness becomes aloneness - choosing your retreat, choosing to be by yourself, enjoying the joy of missing out
Why the same experience can be sad or happy: the same physical experience of being alone - whether it destroys you or brings peace depends entirely on whether you're happy inside
The acute awareness that changes everything: being acutely aware of what is luck and what is outcome in your life - and once it's luck, taking advantage immediately, never letting luck go without a return on it
The best advice ever received: "Today is not tomorrow" - given by a World Bank Vice President during a financial crisis, meaning what actions you take today can change the outcome for tomorrow
The beauty of choosing your own path: somebody created a path, somebody started a podcast, somebody sent their hair, somebody lost an election and came back and contested again - the beauty of being human is our constant ability to choose the path we want to take
Why poverty creates fear that kills risk-taking: abundance allows people to take more risks - if you know you can declare bankruptcy and still get back up, you're allowed to take risks, but in Africa if you fall down you may never get up, so it takes more effort to take risks
The joy people miss out on: when you can't affirm your own spirit because of fear and conformity, you miss out on a level of joy that you can only experience when you say damn what everybody thinks and choose how you will exist in this world
Host: Derrick Abaitey