Floor 27

What if the very thing you’ve been taught to avoid… is actually the key to your freedom?

In this episode, So Selfish, we unpack the idea of choosing yourself—fully, boldly, and without guilt. I explore how many women have been conditioned to prioritize others at their own expense, constantly negotiating their dreams through the lens of how it will affect the next person.

But what if “selfishness” isn’t a flaw… but a form of liberation?

This conversation dives into how reclaiming your desires, your time, and your vision can become an act of deconstruction—breaking down the societal expectations and limiting identities placed on women. It’s about unlearning the need to shrink, overextend, and self-abandon just to be seen as “good.”

If you’ve ever felt torn between who you are and who you’ve been told to be, this episode is your permission slip to choose yourself—unapologetically.

Because maybe… being “selfish” is exactly what your purpose requires.

In this episode, we’re talking about the quiet but powerful discipline of establishing order in our lives. Everything we have — our time, our platforms, our relationships, our opportunities — is something we’ve been entrusted with. And how we steward those things matters.

Sometimes we pray for more: more influence, more resources, more opportunities. But before increase comes stewardship. Before overflow comes order.

This conversation is an invitation to step into authority over your own life. To take responsibility for what’s already in your hands and to treat every assignment, every room, and every resource with intention and care.

Because when we show God that we can be trusted with what we have now, we position ourselves for greater things.

If you’ve been feeling called to grow, to lead yourself better, and to prepare for the next level of your life, this episode is for you.

This is one of the most vulnerable episodes I’ve ever recorded.

In this conversation, I unpack something we don’t speak about enough — the quiet, sacred coming of age from girlhood into womanhood. Not just the milestones. Not just the age. But the internal shift. The moment you realize something in you has settled, deepened, anchored.

I explore what girlhood really is: free-spirited, curious, imaginative, bold enough to believe it can change the world. And I honor womanhood for what it becomes: grounded, secure, discerning, powerful in a quieter but more sustained way.

This episode is not about one being better than the other. Girlhood is not inferior because it comes first. Womanhood is not superior because it comes later. They are both powerful. Both necessary. Both sacred.

In our girlhood, we carry the raw potential of the women we will become. We gather the wisdom, the questions, the wounds, the dreams — all the tools that later form our foundation. Girls have the curiosity to impact a generation. Women have the steadiness to sustain one.

And sometimes, no one can predict when the shift happens. It doesn’t arrive because the world says you’re ready. It comes when you are.

If you’ve ever felt yourself changing… if you’ve ever grieved the girl you used to be while stepping into the woman you’re becoming… this conversation is for you.

I unpack how my understanding of love and relationships was first shaped by the family structure I grew up in, by watching the dynamics between my parents, and by how those early experiences influenced my perception of Black love, marriage, and partnership. Carrying those unexamined beliefs into early adulthood, I entered relationships defensively, with broken ideologies, and repeatedly found myself attracting the wrong partners.

At some point, a hard truth surfaced: I had never chosen to be single. Singlehood had chosen me. And for the first time, I decided to take ownership of it.

This episode explores what it means to define your singlehood—to ask intentional questions like: Who do I want to become in this season? How do I want to show up for myself? What do I want to heal, unlearn, and rebuild before I invite romantic partnership into my life again?

I also challenge the idea that being single means being without relationship. Singlehood doesn’t remove us from connection—it often calls us deeper into other relationships that require our full presence: friendships, family, siblinghood, and our role as children to our parents. Sometimes this season is an invitation to show up more fully in those spaces.

Through the story of Ruth and Naomi from the Bible, I reflect on how faithfulness, service, and deep friendship can become places of healing, restoration, and unexpected favor. Ruth’s devotion to Naomi wasn’t romantic—but it was transformational for both of them. It reminds us that purpose, discovery, and growth don’t only live in romantic love.

This episode is for anyone who is single and tired of seeing it as a waiting room. It’s an invitation to view singlehood as sacred ground—a season of becoming, of service, of self-discovery, and of learning how to love well, starting with yourself.

People-pleasing feels noble. It feels kind. It feels selfless.
But what if it’s actually self-abandonment?

In this episode, I unpack how people-pleasing leaves you empty — pouring and pouring from a cup that hasn’t been filled in a long time. I explore how constantly performing for others can be a sign of deep disconnection from yourself, and even a quiet rejection of who you truly are.

When you live to meet everyone’s expectations, you slowly lose access to your own voice. You show up as the performer, not the person. And eventually? You get tired. The performance becomes unsustainable. The overcommitting, the overpromising, the endless “yes” — it catches up with you. And suddenly, labels like inconsistent, unreliable, or dishonest start to attach themselves to your name.

But what if those labels were never truly you?

What if the real you — the grounded, honest, present version — has just never been given the space to exist?

I also speak about the difficult but necessary crossing over: leaving people-pleasing behind. The grief, the discomfort, and the shame that can follow when you realize you’ve been operating from your most broken state. And how giving yourself grace is not optional — it’s essential.

This episode is an invitation to come back to yourself.
To stop performing.
And to finally meet who you really are.