A Better Way to Say

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If your conversations keep running on the same script (how are you, what do you do, how was your weekend), you've probably felt the boredom set in on both sides. Everyone is being far too serious lately, and fun is one of the most underrated communication skills you can build. The people we remember are the ones who play with ideas, say the unexpected, and bring a little whimsy into the room.

In this episode of A Better Way to Say, I break down what makes someone fun to talk to, and how to bring more levity, playfulness and wit into your everyday conversations so you become more memorable and more persuasive.

You'll learn the two skills behind every fun conversationalist (play and keen observation), how to spot the areas of your life where your conversations go flat, the reframe that makes networking events, work meetings and dates feel lighter, and how to use the pattern interrupt to wake up a conversation that's running on autopilot.

If you've ever been told you're too serious, freeze up in small talk, turn into a robot in the conference room, or simply want to be more charismatic and fun to be around, start here.

RESOURCES MENTIONED
Episode: Your Desire to Impress is Ruining Your Conversations
Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton (the "golden apples" passage is from the chapter "The Ethics of Elfland")

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Trying to impress people is the fastest way to be forgotten. If you've ever left a conversation replaying what you said, wondering how you came across, this episode is for you. The more you strive to be likable, witty or polished, the less memorable you become. Here's how to stop performing in conversation and start being remembered.In this episode of A Better Way to Say, I share two shifts that free you from people-pleasing and overthinking in conversations, so you can speak with ease, confidence and presence. You'll learn why the way you see conversation shapes everything about how you show up, the simple reframe that replaces the "stage" with a walk side by side, and why self-knowledge (not self-analysis) is what finally lets you stop caring what people think and focus on the person in front of you.Plus: the eye contact fix that transformed a friend's networking events, what the ancient Greek idea of "know thyself" has to do with being a better conversationalist, and what I learned watching Magic Johnson speak at the Economic Club of Chicago.If you struggle with social anxiety, feel invisible in groups, or want to be more confident and authentically yourself in every conversation, start here.

Get the Eloquence Unlocked guide here to improve your speaking skills.
How do you become a confident public speaker without turning into a watered-down version of yourself?
In this episode, I sit down with Bianca Anderson, named one of the 100 most influential SEOs in the country and a keynote speaker at MozCon, Brighton SEO, SEO Week, and Women in Tech SEO. Bianca shares how she reframes imposter syndrome as a tool, what improv taught her about active listening and letting go of perfection, and how she went from saying "I don't know enough" to speaking on international stages.
You'll learn how to overcome public speaking nerves, how to develop a unique point of view in a world of information overload, how to start public speaking when you have no experience, and how to bring your personality into your work without losing credibility.
Connect with Bainca on LinkedIn

Get the Conversation Compass, my guide with a full log of thoughtful questions to try in your own conversations.
There is an art to asking questions in a conversation, and most people are asking the same boring, expected ones. In this episode, I break down exactly how to ask questions that move a conversation from mundane to meaningful.
Learn how to turn small talk into a springboard for something deeper, how to listen for the values and emotions driving what someone says, and the two-part "listen and dig" approach that leads to unforgettable conversations.
RESOURCES MENTIONED:
Aristotle's Metaphysics "All men by nature desire to know"
G.K. Chesterton's Orthodoxy
Cicero's De Oratore

Get the Conversation Compass, a tool for having deeper, more interesting conversations no matter where you are.Learn how to always have something interesting to say. There's a difference between being pleasant to talk to and being genuinely interesting. I break down exactly what made history's greatest conversationalists (Socrates, Voltaire, Cleopatra) so magnetic, and how to apply the same principles to become a more interesting, engaging conversationalist yourself.You'll learn how to nourish your mind so you always have something to draw from in conversation, why listening one level deeper changes everything, and why dropping the mask is what actually makes people want to keep talking to you.RESOURCES MENTIONED:Edifying Environment episode (train yourself to be eloquent)Ben Franklin's Poor Richard's Almanack on the virtue of silenceAristotle's RhetoricEnjoy this episode? Follow A Better Way to Say for more lessons.