562 episodes
- As moms, it's so easy to compare our children to everyone else's. We wonder why one child seems to thrive in situations where another struggles. We ask ourselves if we're doing something wrong or if we'd somehow be a better parent if our child were different.
But what if God intentionally gave you the child you have?
In this episode, I'm talking about what it looks like to parent the child God created instead of the child we expected. Everyone has a unique personality, unique strengths, unique struggles, and a unique purpose. Our job isn't to force them into a mold, it’s to become students of who God made them to be.
I share an episode with Sally Clarkson and her son Nathan about how our parenting often changes when we begin looking beyond behavior and start asking what our children truly need. Sometimes what looks like defiance is anxiety. Sometimes what looks like impulsiveness may be part of how God uniquely wired them. As parents, we have the opportunity to respond with curiosity, compassion, and wisdom instead of frustration.
We'll also discuss the reality of raising children with ADHD, OCD, sensory challenges, autism, or other forms of neurodivergence. Receiving a diagnosis can feel overwhelming, but it doesn't define your child. It simply gives you a better map for understanding how they experience the world. God isn't surprised by your child's wiring, and He certainly isn't limited by it.
Remember, God didn't make a mistake when He gave your child to you. He chose you to be their mom for a reason, and He promises to give you the wisdom and grace you need for every step of the journey.
Connect with Sally Clarkson:
Website: SallyClarkson.com
Instagram: Sally Clarkson (@sally.clarkson)
Facebook: Sally Clarkson
Links Mentioned:
Don't Mom Alone: By Heather MacFadyen
Different: By Sally and Nathan Clarkson
Related Episodes:
Loving Your “Different” Child :: Sally and Nathan Clarkson [Ep 149]
Mothering Autism: Navigating Grief, Marriage, and Community :: Carrie Cariello, Kate Swenson, and Adrian Wood [Ep 515]
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Maybe it was the question, "What's for dinner?" that pushed you over the edge. Maybe it was another toddler tantrum, another sleepless night, a teenager's attitude, caring for aging parents, or simply feeling touched out after pouring into everyone else all day.
If that's you, I want you to hear this: There is nothing wrong with you. God is not surprised that you feel overwhelmed.
One of the biggest lies we believe as moms is that good moms don't get overwhelmed. Somewhere along the way, we begin acting as though we're supposed to be limitless. But only God is limitless.
I share an episode from Kat Lee that has stayed with me. As a young mom, she found herself sitting in her van in the garage, overwhelmed and in tears. She cried out to God, expecting Him to change her circumstances, but instead He gently invited her to begin preparing her heart before the day ever began. His invitation wasn't about checking off another spiritual discipline or becoming a "better Christian." It was simply an invitation to spend a few quiet moments remembering who He is, reading a few verses, praying for her children, and asking Him to help her become a conduit of His grace throughout the day.
Jesus invites us to return to Him again and again throughout the day. He is the source of Living Water that never runs dry. Whether you're feeling emptied by toddlers, teenagers, aging parents, anxiety, work, or simply the weight of everyday motherhood, His grace is still available. The goal isn't to become a mom who never runs out of energy or patience. The goal is to become a mom who knows where to go when she does.
Connect with Kat Lee:
Website: InspiredToAction.com - Inspiration for Motherhood
Instagram: Hello Mornings with Kat Lee (@hellomornings)
Links Mentioned:
Don't Mom Alone: By Heather MacFadyen
Hello Mornings - We help you build a consistent morning routine.
Related Episodes:
The Mom Game Changer :: Kat Lee {Ep 41}
Don’t Mom Alone (#GCMLive Event) :: Kat Lee and Wynter Pitts [Ep 185]
Healthy Habit Building :: Kat Lee [Ep 300]
Featured Sponsors:
Hiya Health: We've worked out a special deal with Hiya. Receive 50% off your first order on any of their products. To claim this deal you must go to hiyahealth.com/DMA. This deal is not available on their regular website. Get your kids the full-body support they deserve.
Thrive Causemetics: Amplify your look with Thrive Causemetics. Go to thrivecausemetics.com/DMA to get 20% off your first order. - Have you ever felt lonely in a season where you actually had people around you?
I know I have.
After having my fourth child, I found myself feeling incredibly overwhelmed. I had people in my life, but I realized I wasn't truly letting them in. I wasn't being honest about what was hard, where I was struggling, or what I really needed. After experiencing a panic attack, I found myself in counseling and on a journey toward finding deeper, more meaningful connections.
In this week’s Coffee with Heather mentor series, I want to talk about community in motherhood because I know how hard it can be. As moms, we are constantly pouring out—meeting our kids' needs, managing schedules, and caring for everyone around us. Sometimes friendship gets pushed to the side because we simply don't have the energy left.
But the truth is, we were never meant to do motherhood alone.
In this conversation, I share:
Why making and maintaining friendships can feel so difficult as a mom.
How we can unintentionally keep people at a distance.
The insecurity that can come when we see groups of moms who already seem connected.
How vulnerability helps us move from surface-level relationships into real connection, and how to practically do that.
Practical ways to start building community, even in a busy season.
I also share an interview with Jada Edwards about the importance of remembering that our kids don't need a perfect mom—they need the mom God created us to be. We can trust Him with the gaps and allow Him to bring people into our lives who can speak truth, love, and encouragement into our children.
God often provides a village in ways we don't expect. Sometimes we just have to be willing to ask Him to show us who those people are and take the first step toward connection.
Connect with Melanie Shankle:
Website: Big Mama – the big mama blog
Facebook: Melanie Shankle -The Big Mama Blog
Connect with Jada Edwards:
Website: Jada Edwards
Instagram: Jada A Edwards (@jada_edwards)
Links Mentioned:
Feelings Chart
Needs Chart
Don't Mom Alone: By Heather MacFadyen
Related Episodes:
You are Qualified in Christ :: Jada Edwards [Ep 248]
Generational Healing: Becoming the Mom You Needed :: Melanie Shankle [Ep 508]
Navigating Friendship :: Melanie Shankle [Ep 273]
Featured Sponsors:
Branch Basics: And here’s the good news—Branch Basics is now available everywhere you shop: at Target, Target.com, Amazon, and of course, BranchBasics.com. Tossing the toxins has never been more convenient! For anyone grabbing the Premium Starter Kit, you can still get 15% off at BranchBasics.com with our code [DMA]. The Premium Starter Kit comes with The Concentrate, and refillable bottles for your surface cleaners, including All-Purpose, Bathroom, Streak-Free, Foaming Hand Wash, and Laundry. It also comes with Oxygen Boost for extra stubborn stains on pots and pans, laundry, bathroom tile and more. This kit is a great way to kickstart your human-safe cleaning routine
Hiya Health: We've worked out a special deal with Hiya. Receive 50% off your first order on any of their products. To claim this deal you must go to hiyahealth.com/DMA. This deal is not available on their regular website. Get your kids the full-body support they deserve.
Honeylove: Save 20% off Honeylove by going to honeylove.com/DMA #honeylovepod - Have you ever had one hard parenting moment and immediately thought, "I'm such a bad mom"? I know I have. It's amazing how quickly we can go from, "Today was hard," to believing something is wrong with us instead of recognizing we simply had a difficult moment.
In this week's Coffee with Heather mentor series, we're talking about one of the most important relationships we have—the relationship with ourselves. As moms, we're often so quick to extend grace to our kids, our spouses, and our friends, yet we're incredibly harsh with the woman staring back at us in the mirror. We hold ourselves to impossible standards, compare ourselves to what we see online, and believe the lie that we're supposed to have motherhood figured out.
In this conversation, I want to encourage you to begin recognizing the difference between conviction, condemnation, and shame. We'll talk about why self-compassion isn't self-pity, how to quiet your inner critic, and how to replace the lies we believe with the truth of God's Word. Motherhood was never meant to be lived under the weight of perfection. God isn't asking you to be a perfect mom—He's inviting you to faithfully walk with Him, receive His grace, and extend that same grace to yourself.
If you've been carrying around mom guilt, feeling like you're constantly falling short, or wondering if you're enough, I hope this conversation reminds you that your identity isn't found in one parenting moment. It's found in Christ. There is no perfect formula for raising kids, but there is a faithful God who redeems our mistakes, transforms our hearts, and walks with us through every season of motherhood.
Connect with Kim Fredrickson:
Facebook: The Self-Compassion Club
Instagram: Kim Fredrickson (@kimfredrickson)
Connect with Jada Edwards:
Website: Jada Edwards
Instagram: Jada A Edwards (@jada_edwards)
Links Mentioned:
Give Yourself a Break: By Kim Fredrickson
Give Your Kids a Break: By Kim Fredrickson
Don't Mom Alone: By Heather MacFadyen
Related Episodes:
You are Qualified in Christ :: Jada Edwards [Ep 248]
Quiet Your Inner Critic and Practice Self-Compassion :: Kim Fredrickson
Remaining You While Raising Them :: Alli Worthington [Ep 420]
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Our place: Upgrade your kitchen with Our Place today. Visit fromourplace.com/DMA and use code DMA for 10% off sitewide. With a 100-day trial, you can try it completely risk-free.
Lifepro: For a limited time, our listeners can get $20 OFF the Waver Vibration Plate plus Free Shipping with code [DMA] at lifeprofitness.com. - Welcome back to the Coffee with Heather series! This week, we're talking about something that has completely transformed the way I parent: connection before correction.
For a long time, I believed it was my job to control my boys' behavior. I thought that if I could just get them to listen better, behave better, or make fewer mistakes, then I would be doing my job as a mom. But if I'm honest, that mindset left me feeling anxious, overwhelmed, and disconnected from the very people I wanted to love well.
The more parents, mentors, and experts I interviewed over the years, the more I realized something beautiful: God never called me to control my children. He called me to guide them, disciple them, and build a relationship where they know they are deeply loved and safe.
When connection becomes the foundation, correction becomes so much more effective.
In this episode, I share some of the parenting lessons that have given me freedom, including insights from Jim and Lynne Jackson and the biblical reminder that God's kindness leads us to repentance. That verse has changed the way I think about discipline—not as punishment, but as teaching, guiding, and helping my children grow.
When our children know they are loved, enjoyed, and accepted, trust begins to grow. And trust creates partnership. From that place, correction feels less like control and more like discipleship.
In this episode, we'll talk about:
The difference between behavior management and heart transformation.
Why discipline is really about teaching, not punishing.
How to become a safe place for your children.
The importance of staying calm and regulating your own emotions.
Why giving your child—and yourself—a "do-over" can strengthen your relationship.
Practical ways to create meaningful one-on-one connections, even during busy seasons.
Connect with Jim and Lynne Jackson:
Website: Home | Connected Families
Instagram: Connected Families | Parent with Confidence and Grace (@connectedfams)
Facebook: Connected Families
Links Mentioned:
Heartfelt Discipline: By Clay Clarkson
Discipline that Connects by Jim and Lynn Jackson
Don’t Mom Alone book
Related Episodes:
Discipline 101 (LIVE Event–Friday Night) :: Jim and Lynne Jackson [Ep 221]
Parenting a Spicy Child: How to Stay Calm, Set Boundaries, and Keep the Connection :: Mary Van Geffen [Ep 558]
Choosing Connection Over Critique :: Rachel Macy Stafford [Ep 280]
Featured Sponsors:
Hiya health: We've worked out a special deal with Hiya. Receive 50% off your first order on any of their products. To claim this deal you must go to hiyahealth.com/DMA. This deal is not available on their regular website. Get your kids the full-body support they deserve.
Branch Basics: And here’s the good news—Branch Basics is now available everywhere you shop: at Target, Target.com, Amazon, and of course, BranchBasics.com. Tossing the toxins has never been more convenient! For anyone grabbing the Premium Starter Kit, you can still get 15% off at BranchBasics.com with our code [DMA]. The Premium Starter Kit comes with The Concentrate, and refillable bottles for your surface cleaners, including All-Purpose, Bathroom, Streak-Free, Foaming Hand Wash, and Laundry. It also comes with Oxygen Boost for extra stubborn stains on pots and pans, laundry, bathroom tile and more. This kit is a great way to kickstart your human-safe cleaning routine.
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About Don't Mom Alone Podcast
Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, connects you the listener with people and resources to help you feel less alone. Consider it an invitation to "withness".
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