The Empowered Divorce Podcast; Navigating Divorce After Betrayal Trauma and Abuse

In this episode, I’m talking about something that gets misunderstood all the time: what safety actually is when your nervous system has lived in chronic relational threat. If you’ve noticed triggers around Valentine’s Day, anniversaries, kid exchanges, family gatherings, Target runs, or even a simple text from your ex, you are not crazy. Your body learned to scan for danger because it had to. And while getting more truth can matter, truth alone does not automatically create safety inside your body. I break down why healing after betrayal is a different kind of divorce, why “just move on” advice does not work, and how self love grows when you learn to become a safe place for you.
I also teach the four parts of “safety within” so you can start practicing it in real life: internal permission, internal protection, internal soothing, and internal choice. We’ll talk about the pendulum swing between retreat and over exposure, why avoidance sometimes gets mislabeled as boundaries, and how to tell the difference between real present day danger and trauma activation. If you feel like you have done all the mindset work, all the books, all the therapy, and you still feel stuck, I also share why that is often a sign it’s time for somatic work. You cannot think your way into safety if your body is still living in the old threat. This episode will help you stop treating triggers like a prophecy and start using them as information, so you can stay connected to yourself even when life is messy, because you are the chooser in your life and you get to create that internal safety one step at a time.
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✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced Course :Want real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.
👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://intimacywithin.amiewoolsey.com/intimacy-within-page⁠
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List
👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://datingfromwithin.amiewoolsey.com/dating-from-within-page⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👉 https://theempowereddivorcecoach.com/live-question-and-answer
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
👉⁠https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/body-love-class/⁠
📍 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Believing In You Group Coaching ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ready to stop letting your brain hijack your healing? Learn how to work with your nervous system, shift your thoughts, and create the life you actually want. Next round begins in January—spots go fast!
👉⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amiewoolsey.com/believing-in-you-coaching-program⁠
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.
🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠https://theempowereddivorcecoach.com/when-youve-exhausted-all-of-your-options⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.
👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://shouldistayorgo.amiewoolsey.com/⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://choose.clientsecure.me/request/clinician⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on YouTube: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey
Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

February can feel like love is being shoved in your face. Cards, candy, flowers, couples, social media, and if you’re healing from betrayal trauma and a life saving divorce, it can feel like the world is celebrating something your body doesn’t trust yet. In this episode, I’m talking about Valentine’s Day triggers, anniversary triggers, and why being activated right now does not mean you’re not healing. I’ll help you look at triggers as information, not a verdict, and walk you through how to tell the difference between past threat and present day threat.
I also talk about the anniversary response or body calendar, why you can feel off before you even realize what date is coming, and why progress often looks like less intensity, less time, and a faster return to center. And if you’re in that place of “how could he” or “why wasn’t my love enough,” I’ll help you reframe it so you can honor the love you gave without abandoning yourself again. We’ll end with practical ways to choose safer love right now, without forcing romance, and without shutting your heart down.
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✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced Course :Want real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.
👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://intimacywithin.amiewoolsey.com/intimacy-within-page
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List
👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://datingfromwithin.amiewoolsey.com/dating-from-within-page⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👉 https://theempowereddivorcecoach.com/live-question-and-answer
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
👉https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/body-love-class/
📍 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Believing In You Group Coaching ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ready to stop letting your brain hijack your healing? Learn how to work with your nervous system, shift your thoughts, and create the life you actually want. Next round begins in January—spots go fast!
👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://amiewoolsey.com/believing-in-you-coaching-program
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.
🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://theempowereddivorcecoach.com/when-youve-exhausted-all-of-your-options
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.
👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://shouldistayorgo.amiewoolsey.com/
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://choose.clientsecure.me/request/clinician⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on YouTube: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey
Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Breathwork can feel intimidating after betrayal trauma, yet it can also be one of the most powerful ways to release what the body has been holding.
In this episode of The Empowered Divorce Podcast, Amie is joined by her friend and colleague Halle for a grounded, trauma informed conversation about somatic breathwork. Together they explore why breathwork can feel intense after trauma, how betrayal lives in the body, and why healing often requires more than talking things through.
They discuss nervous system activation, emotional release, and the importance of safety and co regulation when doing somatic work. Halle shares how breathwork helps quiet the survival brain, clear stored trauma, and allow women to reconnect with their bodies in a way that feels empowering rather than overwhelming.
This episode also introduces the upcoming Costa Rica women’s retreat and offers practical ways to begin reconnecting with your breath today, even if you are not ready for a formal breathwork session.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why breathwork can feel scary or intense after betrayal trauma

How trauma is stored in the body and why somatic healing matters

The difference between activation and regulation in healing

Why being witnessed is essential for emotional release

How breathwork can help you let go of what you no longer need to carry

Simple ways to start reconnecting with your breath right now
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Connect with Hali - [email protected]
✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List 👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Cli⁠⁠⁠⁠ck here to register⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
📍 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Believing In You Group Coaching ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ready to stop letting your brain hijack your healing? Learn how to work with your nervous system, shift your thoughts, and create the life you actually want. Next round begins in January—spots go fast!👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Reserve your spot⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced CourseWant real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Check it out here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more + enroll⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on YouTube: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey
Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Musicbed -January 8, 2024The Music Bed, LLC ("MB") approves the use of "Today Will Be The Day - Instrumental" (Composition(s) and Master(s)) for intro"intro" (the "Production") pursuant to your request date January 8, 2024 as follows:SECTION IComposition/Master: Today Will Be The Day - InstrumentalArtist(s): Summer Kennedy

January can feel overwhelming after betrayal, separation, or divorce. It is often called “divorce month,” a time when pressure to change, decide, or move forward quickly is everywhere. In this episode of The Empowered Divorce Podcast, Amie shares a powerful portion of her January live Q and A, offering grounded guidance for women who feel emotionally exhausted, dysregulated, or unsure how to care for themselves right now.
Amie walks listeners through four foundational areas of healing that help rebuild safety and trust within the body after betrayal trauma: self compassion, self regulation, self advocacy, and self trust. She explains why these are not things you have to earn or fix, but capacities you already have access to, even when healing feels slow or messy.
You will hear Amie unpack why self compassion never disappears, even when you choose rest over productivity, how to untangle unhealthy co regulation with an ex, and how learning to say no to yourself in small ways can become a powerful form of self advocacy. She also answers a thoughtful question from the group about how to balance self compassion with self discipline without turning healing into another perfectionistic checklist.
This episode is especially supportive if you are navigating January after betrayal, feeling pressure to make big decisions, or wanting to reconnect with yourself without forcing change.
In this episode, Amie explores:
Why January can feel emotionally intense after divorce and betrayal

How self compassion supports nervous system regulation

What unhealthy co regulation with an ex can look like

The difference between self compassion and self advocacy

How small daily choices rebuild self trust over time

Why healing does not require rushing or forcing change

If you are longing to feel steadier, safer, and more connected to yourself, this episode offers a gentle place to begin.

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✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List 👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Cli⁠⁠⁠ck here to register⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
📍 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Believing In You Group Coaching ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ready to stop letting your brain hijack your healing? Learn how to work with your nervous system, shift your thoughts, and create the life you actually want. Next round begins in January—spots go fast!👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Reserve your spot⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced CourseWant real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Check it out here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more + enroll⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on YouTube: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey
Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

In this episode of The Empowered Divorce Podcast, Amie talks about the deeply human question so many betrayed partners ask: “Why me?” When you’ve loved well, worked hard, forgiven, tried, gone to therapy, and betrayal or divorce still happens — your nervous system searches for meaning, justice, and safety.
Amie gently explores why this question shows up, how rumination can keep you stuck, and how self-compassion, nervous system awareness, meaning-making, and agency can slowly help shift the question from “Why did this happen to me?” to “What do I choose now?”
You’ll also hear a powerful story from the life of speaker John O’Leary and how post-traumatic growth does not mean minimizing pain — but learning to live forward with more self-honor and grounding. This episode will validate your pain, normalize your questions, and remind you that your worth and future are not defined by betrayal.
Keywords: betrayal trauma podcast, why me after betrayal, post traumatic growth after divorce, healing betrayal trauma, nervous system healing, meaning making after trauma, empowered divorce podcast
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✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List 👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Cli⁠⁠ck here to register⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
📍 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Believing In You Group Coaching ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ready to stop letting your brain hijack your healing? Learn how to work with your nervous system, shift your thoughts, and create the life you actually want. Next round begins in January—spots go fast!👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Reserve your spot⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced CourseWant real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Check it out here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more + enroll⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on YouTube: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey
Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠