The Empowered Divorce Podcast; Navigating Divorce After Betrayal Trauma and Abuse

Many women walk away from a marriage knowing deep down they made the right decision, yet still feel overwhelmed by guilt and grief. Especially when children are involved, the emotional weight can feel confusing and heavy.
In this episode, I talk about the kind of guilt that doesn’t make logical sense, the sadness that shows up when anger was expected, and why grief after betrayal and divorce is not a flaw in the system.
I also share practical ways to separate responsibility from guilt, give grief a safe place to move through the body, and show up for your children while still honoring your own healing.
This conversation is for anyone navigating a high conflict divorce, betrayal trauma, or the emotional aftermath of a life-saving divorce.
You are not broken for feeling this way. You are responding to loss.
Guilt after divorce and why it often attaches to the wrong place
Why many women feel sadness instead of anger during mediation or court
The difference between true guilt and false responsibility
How divorce impacts children and what actually helps them heal
What ambiguous loss is and why it feels so disorienting
Why pushing through grief can lead to emotional numbness and exhaustion
Simple, practical ways to give grief space without being overwhelmed
How to show up as a steady parent during chaos
Why feeling relief after divorce is not selfish
How healing begins when emotions are allowed, not avoided
You made decisions with the information you had at the time
You are not responsible for another person’s choices
Children struggle most when they feel alone, not when life is hard
Grief needs movement, not suppression
Sadness and anger can exist at the same time
Feeling relief after leaving a painful situation is a nervous system response
Healing happens when emotions are allowed in manageable doses
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✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
⁠https://amiewoolsey.com/amie-woolsey⁠
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List 👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Cli⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ck here to register⁠
⁠https://datingfromwithin.amiewoolsey.com/dating-from-within-page⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced CourseWant real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Check it out here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more + enroll⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on ⁠YouTube⁠: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey

Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Musicbed -January 8, 2024The Music Bed, LLC ("MB") approves the use of "Today Will Be The Day - Instrumental" (Composition(s) and Master(s)) for intro"intro" (the "Production") pursuant to your request date January 8, 2024 as follows:SECTION IComposition/Master: Today Will Be The Day - InstrumentalArtist(s): Summer Kennedy

If you've ever stood in the middle of your new life after divorce and genuinely not known who you are anymore, this episode is for you. Losing yourself in a marriage built on betrayal is not a character flaw — it's what happens when you spend years trying to be enough for someone who was never fully honest with you.
In this episode, I walk through what it actually looks like to rebuild your identity after divorce, not by performing a new version of yourself, but by slowly coming back to the one that was always there. I share my own experience of losing myself so completely that my own parents didn't recognize me, and how I started finding my way back through small intentional choices that had nothing to do with anyone else's approval.
I also introduce my seven levels of intimacy framework and show you how to flip those inward — because the most important relationship you will ever rebuild after divorce is the one you have with yourself. This is the foundation. Everything else, including dating again, gets built on top of this.
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Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- START TODAY!
https://intimacywithin.amiewoolsey.com/intimacy-within-page

✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
⁠https://amiewoolsey.com/amie-woolsey⁠
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List 👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Cli⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ck here to register⁠
⁠https://datingfromwithin.amiewoolsey.com/dating-from-within-page⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced CourseWant real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Check it out here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more + enroll⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on ⁠YouTube⁠: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey

Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Musicbed -January 8, 2024The Music Bed, LLC ("MB") approves the use of "Today Will Be The Day - Instrumental" (Composition(s) and Master(s)) for intro"intro" (the "Production") pursuant to your request date January 8, 2024 as follows:SECTION IComposition/Master: Today Will Be The Day - InstrumentalArtist(s): Summer Kennedy

Few Spots left for July 20th-25th 2026
https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/rise-renew-restore-retreat/
Alana Gordon & Hali Roderick are two of my most favorite people and I'm lucky enough to also work with.
Alana and I host The Choose To Be podcast for betrayed partners and Hali is one of the coaches with Choose Recovery Services as well.
Head over to the link to find out more!
Rise Renew Restore:
You’ve faced the pain, rebuilt your strength, and carried the weight of healing.
You’ve shown up for therapy, your family, your responsibilities, and you’ve learned how to survive.
But even after all your growth, do you still feel disconnected from joy and life? 
Healing helped you survive, but you deserve more than survival. You deserve to live fully.
This retreat is for the woman who has done significant healing work and is ready to rise into her next phase of wholeness.
You long for joy, rest, and soulful connection. You feel the pull for something more, a high-vibrational space to release what’s heavy, and awaken your energy for the life you are meant to live.
In the lush jungles of Costa Rica, you’ll find the sacred intersection of deep healing, luxury, and adventure, a space where advanced trauma modalities meet soul-level renewal.
Join me for a week of deep healing, fun and connection!
https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/rise-renew-restore-retreat/
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https://amiewoolsey.com/amie-woolsey

Have you ever been the strong one — the one who holds everything together, manages everyone's emotions, and keeps the ship running — but quietly wondered why you're so exhausted? In this episode I'm sitting down with licensed psychotherapist and bestselling author Terri Cole to talk about something she coined called high functioning codependency (HFC). This isn't the codependency you picture. It shows up in capable, successful women who over-function, over-give, and over-manage — and it's exactly the pattern so many of us bring into divorce, co-parenting, and new relationships without even realizing it.
We talk about what HFC looks like when you're parallel parenting after betrayal, how anticipatory anxiety keeps you stuck in overdrive, why strong women are the last to recognize these patterns in themselves, and how awareness is the first step to finally breaking the cycle. If you've ever felt like you can't stop fixing, rescuing, or doing it all — this one is for you.
👉 Take Terri's free boundary style quiz: https://boundaryquiz.com👉 Learn more about Terri and her books Boundary Boss and Too Much: https://www.terricole.com

@terricole
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✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
https://amiewoolsey.com/amie-woolsey
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List 👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Cli⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ck here to register
https://datingfromwithin.amiewoolsey.com/dating-from-within-page⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced CourseWant real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Check it out here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more + enroll⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on YouTube: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey

Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Musicbed -January 8, 2024The Music Bed, LLC ("MB") approves the use of "Today Will Be The Day - Instrumental" (Composition(s) and Master(s)) for intro"intro" (the "Production") pursuant to your request date January 8, 2024 as follows:SECTION IComposition/Master: Today Will Be The Day - InstrumentalArtist(s): Summer Kennedy

If you've ever laughed out loud and immediately braced for something bad to follow, or found yourself scanning for what's wrong the moment something finally feels right, this episode is for you.
Betrayal trauma doesn't just break your heart — it breaks your nervous system's ability to trust that good things are safe to feel. In this episode, I unpack the psychology behind foreboding joy, anticipatory anxiety, and hypervigilance after betrayal, including why your brain actually rewards negative prediction, and why that pattern is not a character flaw.
Drawing on Ronnie Janoff-Bulman's assumptive world theory, Brené Brown's research on foreboding joy, and Frank Corrigan's somatic trauma work, I walk you through my SHORE framework — a body-based practice for moving from chronic hypervigilance toward regulated discernment.
SHORE stands for: Soften the brace, Honor the strategy, Orient to the now, Resource from the inside, and Expand the window for good. Because you don't need to predict the future to be safe.
You only need to trust that you can handle it — and this episode shows you how to start building that from the inside out.
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✨ WORK WITH AMIE + NEXT STEPS IN YOUR HEALING
📍 Dating From Within Workshop- Get on the Interest List 👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Cli⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ck here to register⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💬 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Empowered Divorce Q&A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Free monthly group coaching. First Thursday of each month.
👣 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Body Love Class⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Learn how to reclaim your body after betrayal.
📍 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Believing In You Group Coaching ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Ready to stop letting your brain hijack your healing? Learn how to work with your nervous system, shift your thoughts, and create the life you actually want. Next round begins in January—spots go fast!👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Reserve your spot⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Divorce 101: Self-Paced GuideFeeling stuck in the aftermath of betrayal or unsure where to go next? This guide meets you right where you are and helps you make your next best step.🎯 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Start by taking the quiz⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Intimacy Within: Self-Paced CourseWant real connection in a future relationship? Start by building healthy intimacy within. Learn the 7 levels of intimacy and how to practice them—first, with YOU.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Check it out here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
📍 Should I Stay or Go? CourseThis guide walks you through one of the hardest questions you'll ever face. It's not about finding the right answer—it's about becoming the chooser of it.👉 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Learn more + enroll⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
💻 Want to work with Amie 1:1?Book a consult: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
🎥 Watch on YouTube: Get episodes early + visual tools to support your journey.📲 Follow me on social:Instagram | Facebook | TikTok → @amiewoolsey

Need support ?📩 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Musicbed -January 8, 2024The Music Bed, LLC ("MB") approves the use of "Today Will Be The Day - Instrumental" (Composition(s) and Master(s)) for intro"intro" (the "Production") pursuant to your request date January 8, 2024 as follows:SECTION IComposition/Master: Today Will Be The Day - InstrumentalArtist(s): Summer Kennedy