Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo - Christian Motherhood, Biblical Parenting, Raising Christian Kids

In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace. (Ephesians 1:7)
Hosea was a minor prophet with a major message about God’s unwavering love and faithfulness. The Israelites had turned against God over and over again, and he called Hosea to not just preach about turning back to God but to actively live out forgiveness. Hosea married a woman named Gomer who was continually unfaithful to him. But Hosea pursued her, forgave her, and brought her back to him every time—just like God did and does for his people.
God’s love is not based on our actions. It’s good and right to live a faithful life and continually deepen our relationship with God. But even when we turn away, God wants to restore us to him. His love is not based on our faithfulness or our efforts; it is based on his character.
Our human character says to “forgive and forget,” but oftentimes we don’t let things go. In contrast, God’s perfect character means he never holds our sin against us. He forgives sinners completely, willingly, and perfectly because of what Jesus did on the cross for us.
Our kids will make mistakes and hurt us, but we can extend the gift of forgiveness to them and model the kind of love that pursues, forgives, and brings back. That way, when someone hurts them they know how to extend forgiveness as well.
This week, let’s pray that our kids know they are forgiven for all their sins because of God’s gift of grace. Let’s pray that they will be quick to forgive others because they have been forgiven by Christ.
Jesus, thank you for your perfect love and perfect forgiveness. Help __________ to be a person of grace, knowing that they can forgive others because you have forgiven them. May they learn to truly grasp the miracle of grace and the depth of your love for them. Amen.

If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes. 

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Welcome back!
Have you ever wondered if you fit in the story of God? Maybe you’re reading your Bible and just wonder how it all works together. As Christian parents, it’s important to wrestle with these types of questions. These questions will certainly come up as your kids take their faith journey. 
My guest today is Dr. Jonathan Murphy and he helps us tackle questions of faith. He is the senior pastor of Stonebriar Community Church, a seminary professor and author. Most importantly, he is a wife to my friend Sarah-Jane and they have four beautiful children.
My favorite part is when Jonathan reminds us that we all have the same purpose - to love God and to love others. There is great joy found in that purpose. This was a powerful reminder to me to stay obedient where He has me planted - in this season of parenting, in this current city and current time in history.

Connect with Pardon The Mess:
Christian Parenting
Pardon The Mess 
Courtney DeFeo
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Resources from today’s show:
Authentic Influencer by Dr. Jonathan Murphy
The Story of God and Us by Dr. Jonathan Murphy
Tik Tok inspiration - man caring for veteran
Sign up for Morning Minute
Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

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When they had crossed, Elijah said to Elisha, “Tell me, what can I do for you before I am taken from you?”
“Let me inherit a double portion of your spirit,” Elisha replied. (2 Kings 2:9)
Elisha was Elijah’s protégé. Most scholars agree that he probably spent six years with Elijah, learning from him and serving him. He had big shoes to fill, and he knew it! When Elijah was readying to leave and be with the Lord, Elisha asked for a double portion of Elijah’s power. This was a big ask, not because it was too big for God but because it meant a lot of responsibility. Elisha was ready because he hungered for God.
Elisha was not looking to be better than Elijah. He did not want to outdo his miracles and accomplishments. Elisha saw what God did through Elijah, and he wanted that too! Elisha wanted to carry on the work that his mentor started, and he understood that he needed more of God in order to do that.
Our kids are the future, and they will do amazing things for God’s kingdom. As their parents, we get to encourage them to seek after God and boldly ask for his presence and miracles in their lives. We get a front row seat to witness their journey of obedience. They don’t need more power, more popularity, more money, or more influence to make an impact on the world. What they truly need is a deep connection with God. The wonderful news is that as we draw closer to him, we inevitably develop a greater desire for him, recognizing that he is the source of our strength, joy, and peace.
This week, let’s pray that our kids hunger for God and that as they grow in faith they say, “more of you, God, less of me.” 
Lord, give _________ a hunger for you. May they always look to you as the source of their abilities, knowing that their weaknesses are made strong in your presence. Help them to always recognize their need for you in their life and give them the confidence that they can do amazing things through you. More of you, less of them. Amen.

If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes. 

Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today

Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

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I get so many books and pitches that come across my desk. There are so many talented4w authors, pastors and leaders out there and I wish I could have every one of them on. I always pray for discernment on which guests to put in front of you.

When the new book, Rebranding the Church by Dr. Eric Mason, came across my desk, I was definitely intrigued. Dr. Mason planted a church in a tough neighborhood in Philly over 19 years ago. He’s a passionate pastor, husband and father that is leaning into important conversations for unity in the church. 

This conversation challenged my thinking and I pray it does that for you too. In today’s episode, Dr Mason and I talk about the state of the church and the constant division we are seeing. Are we being a light to our cities? Are we unified with other believers or treating them like enemies? What is the image the world sees with church leadership?

I hope this stirs your thinking (like it did for me) and challenges you to lead my family well in the area of church unity. My favorite part is towards the end when he talks about his approach to Christian parenting. He has his kids listen to podcasts and it invites them to ask questions around faith. He encourages us to invite dialogue into our home. I love that he is an intentional and present dad in the midst of pastoring thousands of people.

Enjoy!
Courtney

Chapters:
(00:00) Introduction and Family Dynamics
(05:03) Navigating the Church's Image and Unity
(10:00) Leadership Challenges in Modern Church
(22:42) Parenting in a Complex Spiritual Landscape
(27:39) The Importance of Presence in Parenting
(29:15) Breaking the Soil of the Heart
(30:12) Unity in the Midst of Division

Connect with Pardon The Mess:
Christian Parenting
Pardon The Mess 
Courtney DeFeo

ORDER YOUR 2026-2027 PRAYER JOURNAL NOW

Resources from today’s show:
Connect with Dr. Eric Mason
Epiphany Fellowship
Thriving Ministry
Rebranding The Church book
Dwell Bible in a Year 
Sign up for Morning Minute
Christian Parenting

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Our Sponsors:
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Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! (Psalm 46:10 ESV)
Elijah did truly incredible things in the name of God. We could list miracle upon miracle and talk about Elijah’s great faith, his refusal to bow to others, and God’s power. But in 1 Kings 19, Elijah slows down, and the story is so powerful.
Elijah was exhausted from all his work defeating the prophets of Baal and he was afraid for his life. So he ran into the wilderness, where he told God he wanted to die. While he slept under a tree, God, in his goodness, sent an angel that provided food and water. With more energy, Elijah continued his journey, waiting to hear from God.
A powerful wind, an earthquake, and a fire came, but God was not in those as you would expect. God was in a still small voice. Elijah was able to hear from God when he was rested, taken care of, and still. He slowed down in the middle of great and important things. He took a nap, ate, drank, and listened.
Our world values productivity and speed. Those are good things, but it’s important to rest too. In fact, God calls us to Sabbath! Sometimes, our kids just need to rest (we do too!). God knows our limits. He will provide what we need—physically and spiritually. And he often speaks in the quiet moments, when our hearts are still enough to listen. So let’s take time to encourage that in our kids.
This week, let’s pray that our kids learn to slow down and listen for the voice of God.
Lord, when __________ feels tired or discouraged, remind them that it’s okay to rest. Help them to take care of themselves, trusting that you will meet their needs. Help them learn to still their bodies and souls and listen for your voice. Thank you for speaking to us and hearing us. Amen.

If you love this episode and don’t have your copy of A Great Cloud of Witnesses yet, it’s not too late to get yours! Go ChristianParenting.org to get your copy and follow along. And don’t forget to tune in to Pardon the Mess every Monday for more prayer episodes. 

Order A Great Cloud of Witnesses today

Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Our Sponsors:
* Check out Everyday Dose and use my code MESS for a great deal: https://everydaydose.com
* Check out IXL and use my code TODAY for a great deal: https://www.ixl.com

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