Pardon the Mess with Courtney DeFeo

I am so fired up about this episode with Chris and Jan Woodruff. I believe serving together is one of the very best things you can do as a family. As I look back over 18 years as a mom, I can truthfully say that the times we have served together has deeply impacted each of us. We always see the best version of our family.Many times, the service opportunities are only available for teens and older. When we discovered Lighthouse, we found a way for our kids to serve as young as 4 years old. In this episode, we talk about the benefit of serving and putting others before yourself. My goal for today’s episode is that it unlocks the power of serving together and motivates many to find unique ways to serve as a family. My favorite part of the episode is when we talk about the benefits of serving together. We have both seen unique benefits on each of our kids. They have practiced and prioritized serving others and we can now see how it has helped develop their character and passions and gifts. Challenge today: Go on a date with your spouse or grab some girlfriends and brainstorm: “What are the top values we want to instill in our home? In our family culture? And then how can we be intentional to live out those values?”Enjoy!Courtney Chapters00:00Introduction and Family Background03:02The Importance of Service and Generosity05:57Building a Family Culture of Service08:52Transitioning from Volunteers to Staff11:49The Impact of Serving on Children15:12Finding Individual Strengths in Service18:00Creating Community Through Service20:12The Joy of Serving Together22:25Empathy and Growth Through Service24:36Building Community and Communication Skills26:46The Impact of Small Acts of Kindness28:04Finding Your Family's Serving Style30:39Navigating Overwhelm in Family Service33:45Encouragement for Busy Families37:04Getting Involved with LighthouseConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoGet your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of FaithResources from today’s show:Lighthouse Family RetreatLight ‘Em Up - 100 simple ideas and random acts of kindnessIn This House, We Will Giggle - Courtney’s bookUnder shorts for women - you’re welcomeChristian Parenting storePardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, ‘If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free’” (John 8:31–32 ESV)To abide in Christ is to remain, continue, or stay in Christ. It means taking what we know about who God is, who we are in Christ, and what the Bible says, and using those things to grow in a permanent relationship with the Lord. It means trusting him for all things—trusting we are loved, trusting his word is true, and trusting in his promises.Truly knowing and following Jesus means continuing to grow our relationship with him. It’s a relationship worth investing in because it is the one relationship that matters: a relationship with Jesus gives us eternal life, peace in this lifetime, and allows us to bear good fruit and do good works. This week let's pray that our kids will know and abide with Christ their entire lives and commit to deepening their relationship with him every day.Jesus, I pray that ____________ would abide in you. That they would remain in your love and choose that every day of their lives. May they read scripture and learn about you in a way that lasts. Help them to keep your truth in their mind so that they may choose your ways over the world’s ways, and let it sink into their heart so that they become more and more like you. Amen.Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

My friend, Heather MacFayden, is a mom of four boys and I am a mom of two girls. We have two very different (but equally enjoyable) parenting experiences. We are both podcasters, but we are also real life friends. We have had many conversations over the last 10 years about the unique differences between raising boys and girls. We decided to take our offline conversations online for you! Part 1 is over at her podcast, Don’t Mom Alone - Boys vs Girls (Part 1): The Early Years. And today, you will hear Part 2 which is all about the dating years. We even get into the anxiety that comes with dances like homecoming and prom. I learned several things from Heather about how boys are feeling during these dating years. After our chat, I immediately went and talked to the girls about how the guys may feel used at times. They are more than a prop in a photo. I was encouraged to hear that her boys want deep conversations and interesting girls. My goal for this conversation was to grow our understanding and empathy of the opposite gender - especially if you only have 1 gender of children in your home. Let us know what you think! What do you wish moms of girls knew about boys? What do you wish moms of boys knew about girls? Send me a DM!In this episode, we discuss:-Dating challenges for teens today-Ideas on how to help boys and girls interact when curiosity begins-How social media and phones are impacting the dating process-Seeing behind the homecoming drama - what is going on with each genderEnjoy!Courtney (02:00) Empathy in Parenting: Boys vs. Girls(04:04) The Challenges of Modern Dating(10:05) Navigating Social Events and Relationships(18:08) The Impact of Social Media on Dating Dynamics(20:21) The Pressure of Appearances in Relationships(21:06) Navigating Modesty and Self-Confidence(22:38) The Emotional Impact of Rejection(23:52) Social Media's Role in Self-Perception(24:40) Understanding Boys' Perspectives on Relationships(25:45) The Importance of Communication and Planning(27:39) The Dynamics of Dating and Social Expectations(29:52) Boys' Leadership in Social Situations(32:11) The Cost of Social Events and Expectations(33:34) Teaching Boys About Respect and Kindness(35:27) Building Confidence in Girls(37:53) Encouraging Individuality in a Conformist Culture(39:55) A Prayer for Our ChildrenConnect with Pardon The Mess:Christian ParentingPardon The Mess Courtney DeFeoGet your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of FaithChristian Parenting Christmas Gift GuideResources from today’s show:HeatherMacFadyen.comDon’t Mom Alone PodcastThe Best Christmas Pageant EverPardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend” (Proverbs 27:17 NLT)Godly friends make us better, not out of shame or peer pressure, but out of a desire to see us faithful to God and pursuing his will for our lives. Godly friends know that God wants more for us than what the world has to offer, and so they will push us in that direction when we start to veer from the path.Who our kids hang out with is important, iron sharpens iron and bad company corrupts character (1 Corinthians 15:33). Godly friends will help our kids grow in their faith and keep them accountable. Ungodly friends will bring them further and further from God’s truth.So this week, let’s pray that our kids will be surrounded by true, godly friends and be a light to the friends around them who don’t know Jesus.Jesus, I pray that ______________ surrounds themselves with friends who know and love you. I pray they would encourage each other in faith, hold each other accountable, and that their friendships would draw them closer to you. Where there is conflict, may they be quick to show forgiveness, just as you forgave us. May _____________ be a light to those around them, always showing what a godly friend is. Amen.Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.orgPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy