Dear Dr. Tracy

Dr. Tracy Dalgleish answers listener questions on caregiving burnout when a partner has chronic health issues, using Spoon Theory to protect the relationship without losing yourself. She shares practical scripts for rebalancing roles during flare-ups, nervous system regulation tools, and ways to support kids with honesty, predictability, and emotional safety. The episode also covers how to stay connected to a younger sister in an emotionally abusive relationship while avoiding the drama triangle, plus navigating “low effort” in-laws who show love through gifts. Finally, Dr. Tracy offers guidance on estate planning conflict, resentment, boundaries, and staying united as a couple, and how to support a partner with emotionally neglectful parents while protecting your children. RESOURCES IN THIS EPISODE: Submit a Question for the Podcasthttps://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScKBYWwVsUAAwh31qEJmKK6iSQ7b0tKF3UD7fMcTufSEPVGqw/viewformCouples IntensiveInner Calm Workshop inside Be Connectedhttps://drtracyd.com/be-connected10 Rules for Hard Conversationshttps://drtracyd.mykajabi.com/ten RESOURCES: Order my new book! ⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠ Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz:⁠ ⁠⁠Take it here⁠⁠⁠ Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠ LINKS: ⁠HelloFresh:⁠ Get 10 Free Meals ⁠hellofresh.com/TRACY10FM⁠ ⁠NativePath:⁠ Special Bundle deal at ⁠getnativepath.com/Tracy⁠ Rula: Get the support you need with ⁠rula.com/Tracy⁠ ⁠KiwiCo:⁠ Save 50% off with code TRACY ⁠KiwiCo.Com⁠ ⁠⁠Vionic Shoes⁠⁠: Use code TRACY for 15% off at https://www.vionicshoes.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this From The Couch episode, clinical psychologist and relationship expert Dr. Tracy Dalgleish unpacks a painful but common experience many couples face in in law relationships: The moment when a partner seems to disappear emotionally after stepping into their family of origin, leaving the other partner feeling alone, unprotected, or disconnected. Dr. Tracy explains why this shift happens, drawing on family roles, nervous system responses, and inner child patterns that resurface in familiar environments. She clarifies why this is not about choosing parents over a partner, but about old survival strategies taking over without awareness. The real wound, she explains, is not just in law behavior, but the loss of the couple bond in these moments. This episode reframes the goal from setting perfect boundaries to learning how to stay connected as a team. Listeners will hear practical questions and small, grounding strategies couples can use to protect their relationship while navigating difficult family dynamics. IN THIS EPISODE: Get immediate support for your relationship: Join Be Connected Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz:⁠ ⁠⁠Take it here⁠⁠⁠ RESOURCES: Order my new book! You, Your Husband, and His Mother Want your questions answered on the show? ⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠     Ready to deepen your connection? ⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. Join the ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠ LINKS: HelloFresh:⁠ Get 10 Free Meals ⁠hellofresh.com/TRACY10FM⁠ ⁠NativePath:⁠ Special Bundle deal at ⁠getnativepath.com/Tracy⁠ Rula: Get the support you need with ⁠rula.com/Tracy KiwiCo: Save 50% off with code TRACY KiwiCo.Com ⁠Vionic Shoes⁠: Use code TRACY for 15% off at https://www.vionicshoes.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this candid conversation, clinical psychologist Dr. Tracy Dalgleish and her husband Greg unpack a real moment from their own marriage to explore one of the most common and misunderstood relational challenges dismissiveness. Together they break down why phrases like “you’re right,” “everything will be fine,” and “don’t you think you’re being sensitive” leave partners feeling unseen and alone, even when the intent behind them is positive. Dr. Tracy explains how dismissiveness is often a nervous system response shaped by socialization, attachment patterns, and learned family dynamics, while Greg reflects on the pressures men feel to fix, solve, and move on quickly. Listeners will learn practical tools to interrupt dismissive patterns, slow down reactive cycles, stay curious, repair in real time, and communicate more effectively. This episode offers a relatable look into how couples can transform quick shutdowns into deeper connection and understanding. Links in Show Notes Be Connected Relationship Support https://drtracyd.com/be-connected 30 Days to Us https://drtracyd.mykajabi.com/offers/B2s9epue/checkout Scripts for Defensiveness https://drtracyd.mykajabi.com/defensive RESOURCES: Order my new book! You, Your Husband, and His Mother Want your questions answered on the show? ⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠     Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz: ⁠⁠Take it here⁠⁠ Ready to deepen your connection? ⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠ LINKS: HelloFresh: Get 10 Free Meals hellofresh.com/TRACY10FM NativePath: Special Bundle deal at getnativepath.com/Tracy Rula: Get the support you need with rula.com/Tracy KiwiCo: Save 50% off with code TRACY KiwiCo.Com ⁠Vionic Shoes⁠: Use code TRACY for 15% off at https://www.vionicshoes.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish shares two of her most trusted strategies for navigating difficult family dynamics—especially during the holiday season when old patterns, expectations, and nervous system triggers tend to flare. Drawing from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, she explains why we can’t change or control others, and how “dropping the rope” and questioning the stories we tell ourselves can immediately shift our emotional state. With relatable examples, practical guidance, and a compassionate lens, Dr. Tracy helps listeners step out of old cycles, reclaim their bandwidth, and stay grounded—even when others refuse to meet them halfway.You’ll Learn:Why trying to change or convince others keeps you stuck in emotional tug-of-warWhat “dropping the rope” really means—and how it protects your peaceHow family dynamics and nervous system activation intensify during the holidaysThe power of asking, “Is this the story I want to tell myself right now?”How to move out of mental spiraling and into present-moment grounding RESOURCES: Order my new book! You, Your Husband, and His Mother Want your questions answered on the show? ⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠     Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz: ⁠⁠Take it here⁠⁠ Ready to deepen your connection? ⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. Join the ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠ LINKS: Calm: Save 40% off at calm.com/Tracy NativePath: Special Bundle deal at getnativepath.com/Tracy Rula: Get the support you need with rula.com/Tracy KiwiCo: Save 50% off with code TRACY KiwiCo.Com⁠Vionic Shoes⁠: Use code TRACY for 15% off at https://www.vionicshoes.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish unpacks one of the most painful and confusing dynamics she sees in couples: being warmly welcomed into a partner’s family—only to later become the outsider. Through a powerful listener story, she explores why these sudden shifts occur, how family systems create scapegoats, and why meaningful accountability is often out of reach. Dr. Tracy also breaks down what real repair looks like, how to protect your emotional wellbeing, and how to stay united with your partner when extended-family patterns threaten your connection.Whether listeners have felt rejected by in-laws, misunderstood, or pushed to the margins of a family they once felt part of, this conversation offers clarity, validation, and a grounded path forward.What You’ll LearnWhy some in-law relationships shift dramatically after major life transitions—especially becoming parentsHow family systems unconsciously create scapegoats and maintain old rolesWhy apologies and accountability can feel impossible in certain family structuresHow to protect your emotional safety without escalating conflictPractical ways to stay aligned with your partner when extended-family dynamics get in the wayWhat real repair looks like—and how couples can rebuild trust together Download my TEN QUESTIONS to ask yourself to get out of your assumptions and stories. RESOURCES: Order my new book! You, Your Husband, and His Mother Want your questions answered on the show? ⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠     Discover your relationship negative cycle with my free quiz: ⁠⁠Take it here⁠⁠ Ready to deepen your connection? ⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. Join the ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠ LINKS: Calm: Save 40% off at calm.com/Tracy NativePath: Special Bundle deal at getnativepath.com/Tracy Rula: Get the support you need with rula.com/Tracy KiwiCo: Save 50% off with code TRACY KiwiCo.Com ⁠Vionic Shoes⁠: Use code TRACY for 15% off at https://www.vionicshoes.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices