Awesome Marriage Podcast

Leadership can be incredibly rewarding, but it can also be incredibly lonely. Many leaders know how to build organizations, solve problems, and care for others, but few know how to care for themselves.
In this episode of The Wider Lens, Dr. Kim sits down with Todd Vinson, author of Mountains of My Mind, to discuss the internal journey every leader eventually faces. Todd shares the personal crashes that forced him to rethink everything he believed about success, productivity, identity, and leadership. Together they explore why burnout isn't a leadership badge of honor, how self-awareness changes everything, and why leading from God's peace—not pressure—is the only sustainable way to build a lasting legacy.
Whether you lead a ministry, a business, a nonprofit, or simply influence the people around you, this conversation will challenge you to become healthier so you can lead others better.
 
Episode Highlights
Why burnout is often a symptom—not the real problem

How healthy leaders build healthier organizations

The connection between identity, peace, and sustainable leadership

Practical rhythms every leader needs to avoid isolation and lead for the long haul

 
Quotes from This Episode:
Todd Vinson:
"It was never meant to be all up to you. We take on that burden and it's really a badge of honor that we carry."

"If working hard is good, then working harder is better. And I think working harder just got me to the ditch faster."

"My drug of choice was being a workaholic. That's where I got my identity because I was seeking approval."

"Brokenness is a great leveler. It gets you to the end of yourself. And that really, that's what God wants to begin with."

"Peace is a manifestation of that relationship with Christ. It's not dictated by the externals around me."

"There's dying to yourself as it talks about in Scripture and neglecting yourself are two totally different things."

"You've got to have other people to surround you. And that's not weakness. That's just called wisdom."

Dr. Kim:
"I don't think God really needed to rest on the seventh day personally because He's God. But He did. And He set something for us."

"We've got to have a rhythm of rest. We've got to have margin in our lives. And it seems like those are the things that we squeeze out."

"I think a lot of times as guys, we sometimes would discount what our wife might say and not value it in the way that I think our wives have wisdom and insight and discernment in ways that we just don't."

"We weren't created to be a Lone Ranger. We were created to live in a community."

"Life's a good teacher, but the tuition is expensive."

What do you do when you've prayed, waited, and hoped for things to change, but they don't?
In this episode of the Awesome Marriage Podcast, Dr. Kim talks with Kristen Wetherell and Sarah Walton, authors of Jesus Will Meet You There, about what it looks like to hold onto faith when life feels painful, confusing, or completely out of your control.
When illness, grief, disappointment, or struggles in marriage leave you wondering where God is, it can be easy to question His goodness or feel like you're walking through the hard season alone. Kristen and Sarah share honestly from their own experiences about trusting God when you can't see what He's doing—and how suffering can actually draw us closer to Him.
They also talk about what happens in marriage when life gets hard, how spouses can support one another when one person's faith feels weak, and why your spouse was never meant to fill the space that only Christ can fill.
You may not always have answers or see your circumstances change, but there is hope: Jesus meets you there.
 
Top Takeaways:
Faith means trusting God even when you don't understand what He's doing. 
Hard seasons can either divide a marriage or draw a couple closer together. 
Your spouse can't fill the space that only Christ can fill. 



Quotes from This Episode:
Sarah Walton:
"The more we fixate on each other's growth and on each other needing to be what we think they need to be, the more we're distracted from our own hearts."
"What an opportunity we have as spouses to be the picture of Christ to each other."
"How often when suffering and struggle comes into our lives, do we immediately turn against each other as though we are the enemy when really what we are facing right now is hardship?"
"Preaching to our hearts the truth when our eyes can't see it is what we have to continually do."
 
Kristen Wetherall:
"God has given us each other as an absolute gift to walk through this road together."
"We cannot change our spouse's heart."
"His job is the heart. That is what he can do. What we can do is we can pray for that heart."
"There is not much more intimate than to literally pour out our hearts in a vulnerable manner and know that I can trust my spouse with my heart in this really fractured place."
 
Dr. Kim:
"We've got to get past that expectation and let God do what he can do and then trust our spouse to God." 
"I think especially the culture we live in where there's a lot of anger, there's a lot of stuff everywhere. And I think it's easy for a couple to buy into that. And then all of a sudden your spouse, instead of being your treasure that God gave you, the gift that God gave you becomes this enemy." 
 
Time to Talk About it:
Is there a place in your life where you are having a hard time holding on to faith because you don't understand what the Lord is doing?

Is that place causing you to turn to your spouse or against them? 

Are you expecting your spouse to fill a void that only the Lord can possibly fill?

 
Mentioned in this Episode:
Connect with Kristen and Sarah.

Get your copy of Jesus Will Meet You There.

Sign up for our daily One Thing email!

Need a low pressure, on ramp back toward one another: 4 Week Connection Challenge.

If your marriage is struggling, try our 90 Days to Save Your Marriage email series. 

Maybe you need to shift how you're viewing your marriage and your spouse. Our Reframing Challenge can help!

Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Continue to pursue your spouse by being a student of your spouse. 

If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

Be the first to hear about all things Awesome Marriage, receive monthly bonus content straight from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy, and take advantage of big discounts by becoming a Marriage Changer!

What do you do when the butterflies are gone and you no longer feel "in love" with your spouse?
If you've ever wondered whether fading feelings mean something is wrong with your marriage, you're not alone. In this honest and hope-filled solo episode, Dr. Kim unpacks why romantic feelings naturally change over time, the difference between love as a feeling and love as a choice, and how couples can begin finding their way back to one another.
You'll discover why emotional disconnection often happens gradually, how small intentional steps can reignite closeness, and why God isn't finished writing your marriage story. If your relationship feels distant, this episode offers practical encouragement and biblical hope for rebuilding connection—one choice at a time.
 
Episode Takeaways:
Why fading feelings don't have to mean your marriage is failing.
The difference between love as a feeling and love as a daily choice.
Practical steps to rebuild emotional connection and find your way back to each other.



Quotes from This Episode:
Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Feelings are real. They matter. But they are information—not truth."

"Don't let a fading feeling become a verdict on your marriage before you've figured out what it's trying to tell you."

"The problem isn't that feelings change. The problem is believing that anything quieter than early romance means something is wrong."

"Early love is about discovery and excitement. Mature love is about depth, history, and a knowing that only time can build."

"If you're waiting to feel in love before you act in love, you may wait a very long time. But when you choose to act in love, the feelings often follow."

"God didn't design love to be a noun you possess. He designed it to be a verb you practice."

"Emotional disconnection usually doesn't happen because of one big event. It happens through neglect, not cruelty."

"Love is rebuilt the same way it was built in the first place—through small moments of safety, honesty, laughter, and presence."

"You don't have to fix everything this week. You just have to take the next right step."

"Feelings aren't the final word on your marriage. The truth is that God is not finished with your marriage."

 
Time to Think About it:
If I'm honest, what's really underneath my "I don't feel in love anymore" feelings—is it loneliness, fear, exhaustion, or something else?

What's one intentional act of love I can choose this week, even if the feelings haven't fully returned yet?

Have I been waiting for my feelings to change before investing in my marriage, or am I willing to take the first step toward connection today?

 
Mentioned in this Episode:
Sign up for our daily One Thing email!

Need a low pressure, on ramp back toward one another: 4 Week Connection Challenge.

If your marriage is struggling, try our 90 Days to Save Your Marriage email series. 

Maybe you need to shift how you're viewing your marriage and your spouse. Our Reframing Challenge can help!

Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Continue to pursue your spouse by being a student of your spouse. 

If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

Be the first to hear about all things Awesome Marriage, receive monthly bonus content straight from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy, and take advantage of big discounts by becoming a Marriage Changer!

Healthy relationships don't happen by accident—they're built one skill at a time.
In this episode, Dr. Kim sits down with returning guest and licensed counselor Debra Fileta to talk about why so many marriages struggle, not because couples don't love each other, but because they haven't learned the skills to communicate that love well. Together they unpack practical ways to become better listeners, healthier communicators, and more intentional spouses.
Whether you've been married for six months or sixty years, you'll walk away with simple, biblical tools to strengthen your connection, improve communication, and reflect the love of Christ in your marriage.



Main Takeaways:
Love isn't always the problem—sometimes it's a lack of relationship skills. 
The healthiest communication starts with self-awareness. 
Listening is one of the greatest gifts you can give your spouse. 
You don't have to wait for your spouse to change first. 



Quotes from this Episode:
Dr. Kim:
"I think a lot of marriages aren't struggling because of a lack of love—they're struggling because couples haven't learned the skills to communicate that love well."

"Jesus is our model for relationships. Nobody served like He did, and nobody loved people more intentionally."

"When we really learn to listen to each other, it probably makes a bigger difference than almost anything else in marriage."

"Don't settle for a marriage that's just surviving when God created your marriage to thrive."

"The payoff of listening well is that your spouse doesn't just know you love them—they actually experience your love."

"You don't have to wait for your spouse to change before you begin obeying what God is asking of you."

"Good communication isn't something you master once. It's something you keep growing in through every season of marriage."

"Sometimes we think we're communicating because we're talking, but communication doesn't happen until our spouse feels heard."

"If you invest intentionally in your marriage today, you'll be grateful for it in every season that comes tomorrow."

 
___________________________________________________________________
Debra Fileta:
"It's often not a lack of love—it's a lack of skill."

"Relationships are only as strong as the skills we bring into them."

"God wants us to become more like Him, not more like us."

"Nothing changes if nothing changes."

"People skills aren't about getting people to like you more—they're about helping you communicate God's love more effectively."

"Just because you start a sentence with 'I feel' doesn't mean you're actually sharing a feeling."

"Healing means looking back at the things that served you in one season and asking whether they're sabotaging you in this season."

"If a relationship is like a recipe, I can't change your ingredients—but I can change mine."

"Most people hear about a book on people skills and immediately think of someone else who needs it. Real growth begins when you start with yourself."

"Listening isn't waiting for your turn to speak. It's receiving what's being said."

"The health of my marriage starts with my personal health. When I become healthier, I have more to offer my relationship."

 
Time to Talk About it: 
Which relationship skill do you think would make the biggest difference in our marriage right now—listening, encouragement, expressing feelings, handling conflict, or something else? Why?
Is there a communication habit or response you've carried from your family growing up that may be helping—or hurting—our relationship today?
What's one practical change each of us can make this week that would help the other feel more seen, heard, and loved?
How can we intentionally create at least 30 minutes this week to simply connect—not solve problems, but listen, encourage, and pray together?
 
Mentioned in This Episode:
Awesome Marriage is on Instagram!

Get your copy of People Skills: Your Relationships Are Only as Strong as Your Skills.

Your marriage communication needs intentional effort and investment: 30 Day Communication Challenge

Sign up for our One Thing email series. One practical thing to do each day to grow your marriage!

Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. Marriage communication is different- it needs your investment daily. Check out Achieving Awesome Communication in Marriage.

If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

It's the perfect time to become a Marriage Changer! When you become a Marriage Changer you'll receive exclusive content from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy as well as our resource of the month! Become a Marriage Changer today!

Talking about sex can feel awkward—even with the person you love most. But avoiding the conversation doesn't make the issues disappear. It often creates more distance.
In this episode, Dr. Kim and Nancy have an honest, grace-filled conversation about building a healthy sexual relationship through open communication, emotional safety, and mutual respect. They share lessons from their own marriage, discuss why every couple experiences different seasons of intimacy, and offer practical ways to have conversations about sex without shame, fear, or defensiveness.
Whether you've been married for six months or sixty years, this episode will encourage you to communicate with honesty, pursue one another with love, and create an environment where intimacy can continue to grow.



Main Takeaways:
Every marriage experiences different seasons of intimacy—and that's normal.
The healthiest conversations about sex happen when both spouses feel safe, heard, and respected.
Comparison is one of the quickest ways to create dissatisfaction in your marriage.
Small, honest conversations build stronger intimacy than avoiding difficult topics.
A thriving sex life isn't about perfection—it's about pursuing one another with love, grace, and intentionality.



Quotes from this Episode:
Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Our marriage is not just about sex. It's about all of life, and our intimacy has to fit the season we're in."
"When you approach conversations about sex with love instead of criticism, you're setting your marriage up to grow instead of to fail."
"Don't compare your marriage to Hollywood or someone else's story. You have to define what works best for the two of you."
"Stay at the comfort level of the person who's least comfortable. There's always another way to build intimacy together."
"It's not really about the quantity of sex—it's about the quality of the connection."
"The goal isn't proving who's right. The goal is making your marriage better together."
 
 
Nancy Kimberling
"We've always approached these conversations with love, not a critical spirit."
"Nothing is more personal than your own body, so sharing it with someone else is the ultimate vulnerability."
"Warmth is the best culture to keep between you when you're talking about intimacy."
"Emotional safety is foundational. It's hard to be sexually vulnerable if you don't feel emotionally safe."
 
Time to Talk About it:
What helps you feel the safest, most loved, and most connected to me—both emotionally and physically?
Are there any conversations about our intimacy that we've been avoiding? If so, what's one small step we could take to talk about them with honesty and grace?
What's one thing I do that makes you feel pursued, appreciated, or desired, and what's one thing I could do more often?
What would it take to take our sex life up one point? How can we make that happen?
 
Mentioned in this Episode:
Sign up for our daily One Thing email!

Our Love Making Survey is a great way to keep conversational loving rather than critical. 

Sex is intended to be a gift for your marriage, if you're having a hard time talking about it with your spouse, try this resource: 62 Questions About Sex.

Want an opportunity to dig into God's Word with your spouse? Find Awesome Marriage on YouVersion. You'll love our 14 Keys to Lasting Love. Check it out with your spouse!

If you haven't browsed our site, you've GOT to check out the marriage resources we have over at AwesomeMarriage.com, and browse our online courses at AwesomeMarriageUniversity.com ! 

Be the first to hear about all things Awesome Marriage, receive monthly bonus content straight from Dr. Kim and Mrs. Nancy, and take advantage of big discounts by becoming a Marriage Changer!