In this episode, Tracy and her son AJ (almost 23) share a field guide for parenting in the digital age. Drawing from AJ’s experience growing up with smartphones and social media, the conversation isn’t meant to scare parents—but to wake them up and help them guide their kids with biblical wisdom.
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Field Guide for Parents: The Digital World and Your Kids
If you’re a parent today, you’re raising kids in a world you didn’t grow up in. Smartphones. Social media. Gaming communities. Private messaging. Endless scrolling. And the truth is, most of us are trying to parent through technology we don’t fully understand—while our kids often understand it better than we do.
In this episode, Tracy teams up with her son AJ (almost 23) to offer a “field guide” for navigating the digital world with your kids. AJ grew up in the smartphone/social media era and shares what he’s learned—both from experience and from research. They call it a cautionary tale, not because parents should panic, but because parents should wake up.
Here’s the big idea: a smartphone isn’t just a phone. It’s a powerful tool with access to an entire universe—and a lot of that universe is unfiltered, unsafe, and deeply shaping.
The Pressure Is Real—But So Is the Danger
Parents feel the pressure early. Today, many kids are getting smartphones in elementary school. And when “everyone has one,” kids start to feel like they’ll be left out socially if they don’t.
AJ shares that this pressure isn’t just about having a device—it’s about access to the communication apps everyone uses. If your kid isn’t on the group chat or the app the team uses, they can feel isolated.
But here’s the problem: social pressure is not a good reason to hand your child a tool they aren’t ready to handle.
Start With the Right Question: Is My Kid Ready for the Responsibility?
A better question than “When should my kid get a phone?” is: Is my child ready for this responsibility?
There are phone options that allow for basic communication without opening the floodgates of social media, porn, and endless content. Parents can start with a “dumb phone” and treat it like training wheels.
AJ compares it to driving a car: you don’t hand your kid the keys and hope for the best. You teach them. You supervise. You build habits. You set boundaries. You require trust and responsibility over time.
Boundaries Aren’t About Control—They’re About Protection
If you decide to give your child a phone, boundaries matter.
Some practical boundaries include:
Screen time limits (and learning delayed gratification)
No phone in the bedroom at night
Charging phones in a public place
No phone use until...