The Balance Theory

This is a conversation about confidence like you've never heard before.

In this episode of The Balance Theory, Erika sits down with Alexis Fernandez, a leading performance coach, speaker, and author whose work sits at the intersection of neuroscience, mindset, and high performance. She also is the host of the Do You F*cking Mind podcast. Today they unpack what real self assurance actually looks like once you take away the job title, other people's expectations and how you look.

This is not a pep talk about ignoring everyone and doing whatever you want. It is an honest conversation about where the line sits between healthy care and living through someone else's eyes, and what it takes to move it.

If you have ever caught yourself thinking:

"I know they will be disappointed if I do this."
"Why do I feel like I have to prove I am a good person?"
"I care more about what they think of me than what I think of me."
"Who am I if I take away my job and what I have achieved?"
"I want to feel like myself again."

Then this episode is for you. In this conversation, Erika and Alexis cover:

- The red flags that your sense of self is not as grounded as you think
- How to know who you are without your job, your achievements or your relationships
- Why becoming more confident often means letting the people you love down and how to do it kindly
- The difference between healthy love and love that only shows up when you meet expectations
- How to build confidence that does not depend on how you look or what people say
- Whether you can accept yourself and still want to change how you look
- How to hold onto the version of you that you became when life changes around you
- Why rock bottom is often where the biggest changes start
- What social media and scrolling are doing to your focus and memory, and how to reverse it
- How to stay ambitious when your capacity changes, including motherhood and burnout
- What actually happens to the brain in pregnancy and postpartum

You do not need anyone's permission to become who you already are.

Filmed at Pivotal Conversations Studios
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SPONSORS

Thank you to the sponsors who made today's episode possible:

🏠 TUMBLE - Machine Washable Rugs, Made Better. For a limited time only, our listeners get 10% off + free shipping tumbleliving.com/BALANCE #Tumble #ad

🍳 CARAWAY - I've loved using Caraway for 2+ years! Visit Carawayhome.com/BALANCE or use code 'BALANCE' at checkout to take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

CONNECT
📸 Instagram
🎙️ Do You F*cking Mind podcast

TIME STAMPS
(00:00) Introduction(02:41) Why Alexis studied neuroscience(06:06) How the DYFM podcast format came to be(07:59) Tough love vs tearing yourself down(11:00) Why people at rock bottom make the biggest changes(17:57) Alexis's worst year and the one way ticket to Paris(21:48) Holding onto who you became when you move home(25:10) The red flags your sense of self is not grounded(28:56) Knowing who you are without your job title(32:46) Why becoming yourself means letting people down(38:53) Can you accept yourself and still change how you look?(46:42) How Alexis feels about ageing(51:45) Motherhood, fertility and finding out about twins(59:28) Has motherhood changed her ambition?(1:01:41) When your capacity changes but your ambition does not(1:08:38) What happens to the brain in pregnancy and postpartum(1:12:21) What social media is doing to your focus(1:17:45) Is the doomscrolling brain reversible?(1:21:11) Kids, screens and self regulation(1:26:43) Would Alexis ever use an AI version of herself?(1:30:44) Can content creators ever be fully present?
WHO AM I?
My name is Erika and I am an Australian living in Dubai. I have my own business as a strategic legal consultant and run this podcast to explore my passion + curiosity for all things health, wellness, self growth & mindset. A big focus of mine is how to sustainably navigate a busy schedule and live my best life in the process. Welcome to my Channel!
📸 My personal IG

LET’S BE FRIENDS
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🌍 My website

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You are allowed to let go of the rules and routines that no longer fit your healthiest self, and this episode might just be the permission slip and re-evaluation you've been waiting for.

In this episode of The Balance Theory, Erika sits down with Dominique Elissa, founder of Selfdom, for a conversation that moves through pregnancy, body image, grief and gratitude, and keeps landing on the same question: what does it actually mean to be well when your body, your routine and your world are all changing at once? This is not another conversation about doing more, optimising harder or adding one more rule to your routine. It is an honest look at why flexibility, not discipline, is what actually makes you well.

If you have ever caught yourself thinking:
"I am doing all the right things and it still is not enough"
"My body is changing and none of this feels like mine anymore"
"I want to trust what my body is telling me instead of following another rule"
"I know gratitude is supposed to help, but some days it feels impossible to even try"

Then this episode is for you. In this conversation, Erika and Dominique cover:

- Why being told she wasn't "good enough" for a modelling job changed the way Dominique saw her own body
- The moment Dominique realised her wellness rules were about control, not about actually feeling good
- How pregnancy is reshaping her relationship with discipline, structure and flexibility
- Why rigidity can cap your life experience more than it protects you
- Grieving a parent while building a family of your own
- What Dominique wants her children to know about their Nonna
- Why gratitude only works when it is practised consistently, not just in the hardest moments
- A simple explanation of cycle syncing and why most women are never taught it
- How to stop wellness tracking from becoming another source of pressure
- Whether a content creator can ever really be present, and where Dominique draws the line

Wherever you are in your own version of change, whether that is your body, your habits or your grief, this conversation is proof the flexible path can be the healthiest one too.

SPONSORS:

🤖 Try Granola for FREE - Go to https://www.granola.ai/BALANCE and try it on your next call.

🧑‍⚕️ Rula patients typically pay $15 per session when using insurance. Connect with quality therapists and mental health experts who specialize in you at https://www.rula.com/BALANCE #rulapod

Filmed at Pivotal Conversations Studios
@pivotalconversations https://www.instagram.com/pivotalconversations
Book a session: https://www.pivotalconversations.ai

CONNECT
📸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠- https://www.instagram.com/dominiquelissa/
🌎 Website - https://www.selfdom.au - For 20% off use the code “BALANCETHEORY”

TIMESTAMP
(00:00) Introduction
(07:14) What did you think your future would look like?
(18:09) They cancelled my job because my belly wasn’t “big enough”
(20:31) Having anchors that make you, you
(21:31) Wellness habits that are more about control than a benefit
(25:04) How do you manage your self-talk?
(26:59) How has pregnancy changed the way you grieve your mum?
(30:19) What would you want your kids to know about their Nonna?
(31:16) Everyone should ask their mums this
(36:43) Does gratitude actually work in your hardest moments?
(42:49) Cycle syncing: What you need to know
(51:36) The role of intuition when you’re pregnant
(56:15) Can a content creator ever fully be present?
(58:47) Will you post your child on social media?
(1:00:22) What does wellness mean to you today?

WHO AM I?

My name is Erika and I am an Australian living in Dubai. I have my own business as a strategic legal consultant and run this podcast to explore my passion + curiosity for all things health, wellness, self growth & mindset. A big focus of mine is how to sustainably navigate a busy schedule and live my best life in the process. Welcome to my Channel! 📸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on IG!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

RESOURCES

▶︎⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 25 Day Self Development Marathon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

▶︎ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠21 Day Self Growth Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

▶︎ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Goal Setting System E-Book⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

LET’S BE FRIENDS

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Some realisations don’t just make you think... they permanently change the way you see your life.

In this episode, I’m sharing 13 powerful realisations, mindset shifts and life lessons that you can’t unhear once you’ve heard them. The kind of ideas that instantly make you question the way you’ve been approaching your goals, relationships, confidence, habits, happiness and the person you’re becoming.

These aren’t complicated self-development theories or another list of things you need to “fix” about yourself.

They’re simple perspective shifts that have genuinely changed the way I think, make decisions, handle difficult seasons and move through life and I know at LEAST one of them will shift something in you too.

If you’ve been feeling stuck, putting pressure on yourself to have everything figured out, or simply want a fresh perspective on your life, this episode is for you.

Because sometimes, changing your life doesn’t require changing everything. Sometimes you just need to SEE something differently.

And welcome back to our solo episodes, I missed these SO much! Let me know if you want to keep seeing more :)

SPONSORS:

Thank you SO MUCH to today's sponsors, you can check them out here:

💪 SUPERPOWER: Take control of your health with Superpower. Head over to Superpower.com and use code 'BALANCE' for $20 off your $199 Superpower membership.

👑 PRIMAL QUEEN: Our listeners get a FREE MONTH of Primal Queen plus FOUR FREE GIFTS at PrimalQueen.com/BALANCE.

#ad #sponsors

EPISODE LINKS:

🎥 Episode with Najwa Zebian
🎥 Episode with Shereen Mitwali

📱 Joe Hudson IG

TIME STAMPS

(00:00) Introduction

(00:42) Realisation 1

(02:20) Realisation 2

(04:43) Realisation 3

(06:16) Realisation 4

(08:34) Realisation 5

(11:15) Realisation 6

(12:14) Realisation 7

(13:46) Realisation 8

(17:13) Realisation 9

(18:16) Realisation 10

(18:27) Realisation 11

(19:08) Realisation 12

(20:18) Realisation 13

WHO AM I?
My name is Erika and I am an Australian living in Dubai. I have my own business as a strategic legal consultant and run this podcast to explore my passion + curiosity for all things health, wellness, self growth & mindset. A big focus of mine is how to sustainably navigate a busy schedule and live my best life in the process. Welcome to my Channel!
📸 My personal IG - https://www.instagram.com/erikadpelle/

RESOURCES
▶︎ My FREE Work Life Balance Workshop: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=REAGPFJ_n7E&t=40s
▶︎ 25 Day Self Development Marathon: https://bit.ly/4cpHmcV
▶︎ 21 Day Self Growth Challenge: https://bit.ly/46CoiqR
▶︎ Goal Setting System E-Book: https://bit.ly/4fEFlfP

LET’S BE FRIENDS
⭐ Substack - https://thebalancetheorypodcast.substack.com/
📸 Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/thebalancetheorypodcast/
📱Tiktok - https://www.tiktok.com/@thebalancetheorypodcast
🌍 My website - https://thebalancetheorypodcast.com/

🧡 This description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. Thank you for your support!
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

She did everything herself. She carried everyone. She showed up perfectly while quietly paying a cost she never even knew she was paying.

In this episode of The Balance Theory, Erika sits down with Dr Neeta Bhushan, 4x author, host of the top mental health podcast The Brave Table and founder of Chaitionics, for one of the most honest conversations about what it actually costs to be the woman who does it all. This is not a conversation about burnout or boundaries. It is about the moment you realise you have been performing your whole life for everyone else and what it looks like to finally stop.

If you have ever caught yourself thinking:

"It is just easier to do it myself"

"I am done carrying everyone but I do not know how to stop"

"I show up for everyone but nobody shows up for me"

"I did not even realise how much this was costing me"

"I have been the strong one for so long I do not know who I am without it"

Then this episode is for you. In this conversation, Erika and Dr Neeta cover:

What it costs to be the woman who does everything herself and why nobody talks about it

How performing for everyone else quietly disconnects you from yourself

Why not every yes is worth saying and how to know the difference

What it actually means to be both grounded and ambitious at the same time

How to hold space for big goals without urgency or force

Why your most successful trait might be the thing blocking your creativity

What motherhood reveals about the stories you have been telling yourself

The Fly Forward Framework and how to use it to move forward without burning out

Why being a beginner again is one of the most powerful things you can do

What you would say to the person you lost if you had one more conversation

The cost of doing everything yourself is real. This episode is what nobody told you about it.

SPONSORS:

🍳 ⁠⁠CARAWAY⁠⁠: I've loved using Caraway for 2+ years! Visit Carawayhome.com/BALANCE or use code 'BALANCE' at checkout to take an additional 10% off your next purchase

💧⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠AQUATRU⁠⁠⁠⁠ -⁠ Use the code 'ERIKA' at ⁠⁠⁠⁠www.aquatru.com⁠⁠⁠⁠ for a 20% off

CONNECT

📸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

🎤⁠Ted Talk ⁠

📚 Books

🌿 Chai Tonics

TIMESTAMP

(00:00) Introduction
(09:20) Mentors, the American Dream and Masking Emotions
(15:11) I'm done carrying everyone!
(21:08) Can you be grounded and ambitious?
(27:26) The Balance Theory
(30:43) Don't say yes to every opportunity
(35:27) This is blocking your creativity
(41:48) Motherhood will humble you
(43:41) Fly Forward Framework
(50:27) I teach this and I still struggle with this
(53:57) What do you want your daughter to learn about success from you?
(57:10) What would you ask your late mum?

WHO AM I?

My name is Erika and I am an Australian living in Dubai. I have my own business as a strategic legal consultant and run this podcast to explore my passion + curiosity for all things health, wellness, self growth & mindset. A big focus of mine is how to sustainably navigate a busy schedule and live my best life in the process. Welcome to my Channel! 📸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on IG!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

RESOURCES

▶︎⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 25 Day Self Development Marathon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

▶︎ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠21 Day Self Growth Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

▶︎ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Goal Setting System E-Book⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

LET’S BE FRIENDS

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You don't need more consistency, clarity or strategy if you are struggling with even putting yourself out there in the first place... and the good news is, working through this is simpler than you think. Whether you work for yourself, someone else, have your own business or are a content creator, then this episode is the kick starter you need to move past all of those fears & uncertainties and CLAIM the opportunities that are waiting for you!

In this episode of The Balance Theory, Erika sits down with Reim, CEO, Executive Producer, Founder, and Content Visibility Expert, to unpack what it actually means to show up online in 2026. This is not another lecture about hustling for followers. It is a real conversation about the fear, the excuses, and the exact shifts that make visibility feel natural instead of forced.

If you have ever caught yourself thinking:

"I don't want to watch myself on camera"

"I don't know what parts of my life I should share"

"Posting online will make me less credible at work"

"I keep starting and stopping and never staying consistent"

"Everyone's watching but nobody's engaging, is this even working"

Then this episode is for you. In this conversation, Erika and Reim cover:

- Why a resume alone isn't enough to get opportunities in 2026

- The real reason you feel nervous or awkward showing up on camera

- How to figure out what parts of your life you actually want to share online

- Why finding your niche advice is often misleading, and what to focus on instead

- How to build an authentic personal brand without oversharing your private life

- What it really means to be strategic with content without overengineering every post

- Why consistency isn't the metric that actually grows your visibility

- ow to know if your content is working beyond likes and comments

- Why the people who leapfrog you in opportunities are usually just more visible, not more qualified

- What your online legacy says about you, and why it matters more than you think

Visibility is not about being loud, it is about finally being seen for the work you have already done.

SPONSORS:

🏥 KINSYN: Head to kinsyn.com/balancetheory and use promo code “balancetheory” at checkout to save 20% off your first subscription order.

🍃BRANCH BASICS: Get 15% off Branch Basics with the code BALANCE at https://branchbasics.com/BALANCE #branchbasicspod

CONNECT

📸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Ted Talk

TIMESTAMP

(00:00) Introduction

(05:51) You're Not Confident Posting Because of THIS

(09:15) Tips If You're Scared of What Other People Think

(16:48) How Do I Decide What Parts of Myself I Want to Share Online?

(20:04) Does EVERYONE Need to be creating content in 2026?

(22:03) Content Can Make You Stand Out as an Employee Like THIS

(29:50) Getting Rid of Your FEAR of Showing Up Online

(33:18) Strategising Without Over-Engineering

(38:16) How to Make Posting Feel Natural

(40:26) Clarity First or Just Getting Started?

(44:12) Should You Post More of What Everyone Likes?

(51:03) What Is Your Online Legacy?

(56:18) Growth You Get From Becoming Visible

(56:48) Today’s Challenge: Try THIS Today

WHO AM I?

My name is Erika and I am an Australian living in Dubai. I have my own business as a strategic legal consultant and run this podcast to explore my passion + curiosity for all things health, wellness, self growth & mindset. A big focus of mine is how to sustainably navigate a busy schedule and live my best life in the process. Welcome to my Channel! 📸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Connect with me on IG!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

RESOURCES

▶︎⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 25 Day Self Development Marathon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

▶︎ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠21 Day Self Growth Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

▶︎ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Goal Setting System E-Book⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

LET’S BE FRIENDS

📸 ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

📱⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Tiktok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

🧡 This description may contain affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. Thank you for your support!
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices