Let's Talk Polyamory Podcast

What happens when you take your relationship out of its usual environment and drop it into a completely different one?
This episode was recorded poolside at our Home Exchange in beautiful Bali, where we're spending a month working, exploring and living our digital nomad dreams! 
But getting settled wasn't quite as dreamy as we'd imagined.
Between figuring out transportation, groceries, unfamiliar surroundings, unusual work hours and how to make the most of our time here, there was a lot to navigate. 
And along the way, we discovered a few things about ourselves and how we function as a couple.
In this episode, we're talking about what travelling together can reveal about your relationship dynamics, from playing to each other's strengths and sharing responsibilities, to decision fatigue, taking initiative and recognizing when competence can become control.
We also share how a difficult conversation led to some positive changes and why healthy relationships aren't about getting everything right, but about recognizing what's not working, communicating and being willing to adjust together.
Whether you're travelling halfway around the world, navigating a long-distance relationship or living everyday life at home, there's plenty here to reflect on.
Because sometimes changing your surroundings helps you see your relationship in a whole new way.
Show Resources:
We love travelling using Home Exchange as it allows us to stay in amazing places in exchange for our home - use this link to get 250 bonus points when you sign up (that's a 2 night stay in most places)- ⁠⁠https://www.homeexchange.com/?sponsorkey=taraandandre-cbef0 ⁠⁠
Looking for more travel stories? Check out our episode we recorded while on our East Coast road trip in the Summer of 2025 -  Carversations: Travelling When Polyamorous or Open - ⁠https://open.spotify.com/episode/5KIL4RSyr4T7sZymJLjxbD?si=mZsxR5oiSyCE2iZRSIcTNA⁠ 
Lifestraw is our go to water bottle when travel - it’s built in filter protects you from bacteria, parasites and micro plastics, allowing you to drink almost any water safely and avoid using disposable plastic bottles. Find out more about Lifestraw and it’s products here - https://lifestraw.com/ 
Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠
New and looking to build a secure foundation? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it here - s://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse 
Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠⁠⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠⁠⁠ 
Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠⁠⁠

Long-distance relationships can be hard. Non-monogamous relationships can be complicated. So what happens when you combine the two?
In this episode of the Let’s Talk Polyamory Podcast, we’re talking about what it really takes to make long-distance love work when non-monogamy is part of the equation. And as two people who love each other while living five and a half hours apart, we have some personal experience with this one and share that throughout!
But what actually makes a relationship “long-distance”? Is it really about kilometres, or is access a better measure?
We explore the surprising benefits of loving from afar, including autonomy, intentionality, anticipation and space for other relationships. We also get into some of the harder stuff: time and travel logistics, jealousy and FOMO, navigating nesting partners and family responsibilities, and what happens when your limited time together starts to feel more like a romantic vacation than everyday life.
We talk about how to stay connected when you’re apart without trying to recreate living together through your phone, why sharing the mundane parts of life can matter just as much as date nights, and why reunions AND goodbyes deserve more attention than we often give them.
And perhaps most importantly, we ask a question that goes beyond whether long-distance relationships can work:
Does THIS version of a long-distance relationship work for YOU?
Because success doesn’t have to mean eventually living in the same city, moving in together or following the traditional relationship escalator. In non-monogamy, we get to think more intentionally about what we want our relationships to look like.
So whether you’re already loving someone from afar, considering a long-distance relationship, or simply curious about whether you could ever make one work, this episode will give you plenty to think and talk about.
🎧 Listen in and then come tell us: Could YOU do long-distance love?
Show Resources:
Andy Morollo - Connecting here and there: A model of long-distance relationship maintenance - https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2011.01392.x
We love travelling using Home Exchange as it allows us to stay in amazing places in exchange for our home - use this link to get 250 bonus points when you sign up (that's a 2 night stay in most places)- ⁠⁠https://www.homeexchange.com/?sponsorkey=taraandandre-cbef0 ⁠⁠
Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠
New and looking to build a secure foundation? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it for only $97 for a limited time for our listeners- ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer⁠ 
Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠⁠⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠⁠⁠ 
Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠⁠⁠

“I’ve lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.” — Mark Twain
How often do we create an entire story about what might happen and then experience the anxiety as though it’s already happening?
We’re back with another carversation. 🚗 These are unscripted conversations we record while travelling the world!
This is one of two episodes we recorded while road-tripping through Morocco in June 2026. We had some mic issues and have done our best to correct the audio, however there are some spots where it isn’t perfect. We hope the conversation will make it worthwhile for you!  
We start with a real-life moment from our trip. Tara thought she’d put the wrong location into the GPS and, with only 15 minutes left to our destination, suddenly thought we might have another two hours of driving ahead of us instead. Spoiler: we didn’t. But the anxiety she felt in that moment was very real, and André’s response was exactly what she needed.
That gets us talking about what happens when anxiety takes over, what we can do to manage it in the moment, and how we can respond when we notice it showing up in our partners. What actually helps? What doesn’t? And why doesn’t reassurance always land the way we intend it to?
And yes, even as a coach and a therapist who help other people navigate this stuff, sometimes we still have to figure out how to coach our damn selves through it.
From there, we bring the conversation into relationships, particularly the anxiety and jealousy that can surface when opening a relationship or navigating consensual non-monogamy.
What happens when our brains take uncertainty and turn it into “If my partner meets someone else, they might leave me”? And what if we could shift that story to “My partner can connect with other people and continue to choose me”?
We talk about the stories underneath jealousy, strategies for managing anxiety when it shows up, and how clear relationship agreements based on our values, using our Values-Based Relationship Agreement Model™, can help create security without trying to control every possible outcome.
In this episode, we also cover:
Practical strategies for managing anxiety in the moment
How to respond when you sense your partner is feeling anxious
Jealousy and anxiety when opening a relationship
Future forecasting and imagining worst-case scenarios
Reframing what it means to be chosen by a partner

Because knowing the tools doesn’t mean we don’t struggle with this stuff too. Sometimes we just have to remember to use them on ourselves.
Show Resources:
We love travelling using Home Exchange as it allows us to stay in amazing places in exchange for our home - use this link to get 250 bonus points when you sign up (that's a 2 night stay in most places)- ⁠https://www.homeexchange.com/?sponsorkey=taraandandre-cbef0 ⁠
Check out our episode we recorded while on our East Coast road trip in the Summer of 2025 -  Carversations: Travelling When Polyamorous or Open - https://open.spotify.com/episode/5KIL4RSyr4T7sZymJLjxbD?si=mZsxR5oiSyCE2iZRSIcTNA 
Addressing Worry - The Worry Tree and Other Methods - https://www.nhs.uk/every-mind-matters/mental-wellbeing-tips/self-help-cbt-techniques/tackling-your-worries/ 
The Thought Model / Life Coaching Model - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnWfkWaNQuA
Another Thought Model article with examples - https://simplysquaredaway.com/the-model/
Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠
New and looking to build a secure foundation? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it for only $97 for a limited time for our listeners- https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer 
Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠⁠ 
Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠⁠

Most people don’t realize how easily they derail the conversations that matter most, until they learn what to look for.
In Part 2 of this series, we unpack the hidden patterns that quietly sabotage connection, like kitchen sinking, labeling, interrupting, blaming, mind reading, layering, and passive-aggressive habits. More importantly, we show you how to recognize these patterns in real time and shift them into clear, grounded, and effective communication.
We also explore how outside influences, like stress, emotional triggers, and past experiences can take over your conversations without you even noticing. From there, we guide you back to presence, empathy, and solution-focused dialogue using practical, easy-to-apply tools.
You’ll learn frameworks like Non-Violent Communication (NVC) and our Attunement Communication Method™, designed to help you move from conflict to connection, without losing your voice.
If you’re tired of feeling unheard, misunderstood, or stuck in the same arguments, this episode offers a clear path forward. Honest, effective communication isn’t just a “nice to have”, it’s the foundation of strong, thriving relationships, especially in non-monogamous dynamics where trust and transparency matter deeply.
Whether you have a partner, dating or single, this episode will help you break negative cycles and build more authentic, connected conversations.
And if you want to go deeper, join T&A live for Deep Dive Thursdays at the Mermaid Lounge on May 14 at 8PM for a special talk: The Other Sexy Talk: More Foreplay for Better Sex. Details and tickets available at: https://thexclub.net/event_description.php?event=697
Resources:
Get our free How to Shift From Destructive to Effective Communication Worksheet - https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/communicationworksheet 
Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠
New and looking to build a secure foundation including how to effectively communicate with your partners? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it for only $97 for a limited time for our listeners- https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer 
Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ 
Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠

It’s a quickie, but a good one! An unfiltered special episode recorded from our bed!
In it, we break down a real-life situation where things built up, our communication took a nosedive, and it felt like our communication went completely off the rails.
We take full ownership of the destructive patterns we fell into - practicing responses, layering/stacking, “yes, but”-ing, and how HALTA (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired & Anxious) was impacting us.
We walk you through exactly what happened, how it unfolded, and what we did to repair, pausing, resetting, and coming back to the conversation with intention.
And in Part 2, we go deeper into these patterns and show you how to shift them into more effective, connected communication + we'll share the worksheet we refer to at the end!
Show Resources:
Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠
New and looking to build a secure foundation including how to effectively communicate with your partners? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it for only $97 for a limited time for our listeners- https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer 
Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ 
Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠