Coming Up for Air

Will my ex come back? It’s one of the hardest questions to stop asking after a breakup especially when you were the one who was left.
But there’s another stage of heartbreak nobody really prepares you for: the moment you realise they might actually never come back.
In this episode I talk about why losing hope can feel like a second breakup, why you can still want your ex to come back even when you know the relationship wasn’t right, and what happens when 'they haven’t come back yet' slowly becomes 'maybe this really is over.'
We’ll get into waiting for an ex to change their mind, struggling to let go, dealing with rejection, wondering whether they regret leaving, and how to move forward without forcing yourself to believe you’ll never hear from them again.
Because healing after a breakup isn’t about knowing for certain that your ex will never come back. It’s reaching the point where your life no longer depends on finding out whether they will. 
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You've stopped speaking to them, so why are you still having entire conversations with them in your head?
In this episode, I talk about why we mentally talk to an ex after a breakup, replay conversations, imagine telling them things and wonder what they'd think of the life we're building without them.
We get into wanting recognition rather than reconciliation, missing being witnessed by someone who knew your whole life, and what these imaginary conversations might actually be doing for you.
If you're struggling to stop thinking about your ex and wondering whether you'll ever fully move on, this one's for you. 
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If you’re single and scared you’ll never find love, I want you to imagine something: your future relationship is already secured.
You don’t know who they are. You don’t know when you’ll meet. You just know you cannot miss them.
How would you live differently if you weren’t constantly wondering when love was going to happen?
In this episode, I am talking about being single in your 30s, dating anxiety, the fear of being alone, finding love later in life and the experiences we sometimes postpone until we have a partner.
Then I’m changing the hypothetical completely: what if I told you that you wouldn’t meet them for another five years?
Because this isn’t really an episode about how to find a relationship. It’s about what you might do with your life if you stopped requiring certainty about your romantic future before allowing yourself to fully live your present.
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If you’re single and quietly wondering whether you’re doing this stage of life 'right,' this episode is for you.
There’s so much pressure to make single life look incredible the travelling, the career, the solo dates, the full social calendar, the constant proof that you’re thriving. But maybe your life doesn’t need to impress anyone. Maybe it just needs to feel like yours.
In this episode, we talk about feeling behind while other people get married and have children, the fear of being single forever, loneliness, changing friendships, creating your own milestones and the ways we accidentally put life on hold while waiting to meet someone.
This isn’t about convincing yourself that you don’t want love. You’re allowed to want a relationship and still build a life that feels meaningful now.
Because your single years aren’t the waiting room for your real life. 
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Youtube - https://youtu.be/uf90Uc_owUw 
Support the show

Being single in your 30s can feel completely fine… until suddenly it doesn't.
Your friends are married, having children and building lives with their partners. You're not on dating apps, you don't have many single friends and you find yourself wondering: where am I actually supposed to meet someone?
And underneath that is the question that's much harder to admit: what if I never do?
In this episode, I'm talking about the pressure of the timeline we thought our lives would follow, the fear of running out of time, comparison, being surrounded by couples and how easily 'I don't know when I'll meet someone' can become 'maybe I never will.'
This isn't an episode telling you to get a hobby, download a dating app or learn to love being single so much that you stop wanting a relationship.
You are allowed to want love. You are allowed to find this chapter difficult sometimes.
This is about learning how to live fully in the uncertainty without treating your life right now as evidence of what your future will look like.
If you feel like everyone else is moving forward while you're still waiting for your life to begin, this episode is for you. 🤍
Want More Like This - https://stan.store/Loula 
My New Instagram - @move.with.lou
Join Us on Patreon - ⁠patreon.com/ComingUpForAir⁠ 
Youtube - https://youtu.be/uf90Uc_owUw 
Support the show