Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

I want to talk about divorce. Christina P holds down the Mommy Dome with Duncan Trussell for the heaviest episode in show history, the divorce episode. Christina addresses it head-on: yes, she and Tom are divorcing after 20 years, no, you don't need to pick teams, and yes, Mommy is ripping darts, drinking wine, and surviving on one Domino's thin crust a day. From there she and Duncan spiral through cancer, TMZ breaking the story while she was in a London pub with Ari Shaffir, and Duncan's own jaw-dropping family divorce story involving a priest and a jammed shotgun.

Then they unpack the International Dick Alert and open some DMs: the guy sending "hey" with one extra Y each time, a Puerto Rican gentleman with a generous offer, the PetSmart employee confusing ferrets and flashlights, aquarium romantic Yung Tang Tang, a Brit promising to beat her vaginal fluid into firm egg whites, and a poly couple charging a $250,000 application fee. A suitor hotline is also officially in the works.

They also hit Burning Man hygiene, spray tan confessions, and a trip down memory lane through an 80s divorce boom including latchkey summers, dads' apartment complexes, frozen hot dogs, dancing with sailors at the Beef and Barrel, and the porn tapes that raised them. Too late for you, too late for the lamb.

Your Mom’s House Ep. 871

https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

Chapters 00:00:00 - Emotional Intro00:04:55 - Opening Clip: Bobby Lee Swoops In00:13:52 - The TMZ International Dick Alert00:19:31 - The Shadow Of Divorce Trauma00:30:05 - Duncan's Parents, the Priest & the Shotgun00:42:38 - What's Real: Grief, Friends & Love00:59:07 - Single Gal Questions, Horny Hotline, & Reading DM's01:15:48 - Pet Smart Ferret Guy & More Suitors01:39:06 - Christina's Curations02:03:10 - Self Pleasure In Spray Tan Booth02:07:11 - Old School Porn At Dad's Place02:17:57 - Latchkey Kids02:27:37 - Trauma Bonding02:33:51 - Final Thoughts

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Sup, chomos! Tom Segura welcomes the shaman himself, Matt McCusker of Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast back to the Mommy Dome.

Tom opens the show with a clip of a man getting pepper sprayed off a plane sends them down a rabbit hole of taser videos, body cam channels, and sovereign citizens. Matt reveals his wife spent five years as a Philly cop, pulling her gun by week three, and Tom recalls his LAPD ride-along with an officer who answered "which time?" when asked if he'd ever fired his weapon. From there: Anthony Weiner debating his way out of a 3-on-1, why psychology is a fake science, the news that oysters are alive when you eat them, and how the World Cup is really America saying "you're welcome."

Plus: a grizzly eats a black bear, a man sexually attracted to forests, a Horrible or Hilarious pool fall for the ages, and Matt's dad discovering Buc-ee's. Enjoy!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 870

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Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:03:55 - Opening Clip: You're Gonna Get Sprayed

00:04:55 - Tasers, Body Cams & Sovereign Citizens

00:08:52 - Matt's Wife Was Philly PD

00:14:33 - The Ride-Along Cop Who Killed Four People

00:18:27 - Taser Clips

00:24:19 - Trolling Telemarketers

00:30:51 - Pastor Manning

00:37:04 - Elite Debaters & Anthony Weiner

00:45:31 - Clip: Sexually Attracted To Forrests

00:47:11 - Animal Violence

00:51:54 - Welcome To USA

00:56:22 - Horrible Or Hilarious

01:05:26 - World Cup

01:12:21 - Closing Song - "Cool Guy Megamix" by Fart Simpson
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Christina P is back touring! Check her out in Chicago September 18th and 19th. Get your tickets at https://christinap.com/pages/tour-dates

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Sup, chomos! This week, Tom Segura holds down the Mommy Dome with Steph Tolev, host of Steph Infection, produced right here at YMH Studios, and the proud owner of a brand new American citizenship.

They open with a man being lowered off a New York City bus screaming "fuck your family," which spirals into roid-rage belchers on airplanes and a "NOT GUILTY!" TikTok attorney whose very satisfied client was charged with luring a minor into his vehicle. Then a listener letter from a self-described 30-year slut recounts the guys' card night that went airtight, and Tom and Steph break down the hygiene logistics nobody at that poker table considered. From there, Tom explains how a chance run-in with his old helicopter instructor ended his flying lessons for good, and Steph talks about her white fuzzy dog, and her daily walking schedule. Along the way they get into Pastor Manning's problem with blacks, a Thailand massage confession, plus Tom and Steph's combined résumé of ugly castings: Steph booking Skittles' "Ugly Princess," not fitting into the Spanx at a Bud Light fitting, and Tom's thumbs landing a Sony commercial. Plus: a homeless man shoots his shot, a man with a solid wall of 45 identical teeth, Steph's fiancé Jefferson shits the couch, the Tickle Monster nearly gets an old man killed, and Bulgaria fails to qualify for the World Cup. Enjoy!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 869

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Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:00 - 2 Bears 5K, Blowjob Knees, & Big Noses

00:09:25 - Opening Clip: Disabled Traffic Jam

00:13:16 - Not Guilty! The Pervert's Attorney

00:18:39 - Airtight Poker Night

00:23:37 - Helicopter Crashes

00:32:14 - Pastor Manning

00:37:04 - Spa & Casting Stories

00:45:58 - Kinky Unc

00:50:21 - Great Wall Of Teeth

00:53:26 - Elevator Fart Prank

00:55:54 - Sabertooth Singles & Monster Mouth

01:00:49 - Public Pranks

01:07:39 - Closing Song - "Planes Trains and Dad Boners" by Jayzeus
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On this week's episode, Main Mommy Christina P holds down the fart with stand-up comic Dave Landau. He's the perfect co-captain to match our dark and twisted-ness, starting with a shared love of David Lynch. After a brief interruption of a staff member (male) in short shorts, Dave recounts his trippy days totaling in approx. 400 hits. Kids these days will never understand. Christina introduces Dave to some Cool Guys and Gals including, but not limited to, a CPAP monster, a pirate, and a guy that looks eerily similar to Robin Williams in Toys. Wrapping up the episode with Christina's TikTok Curations, Dave and Christina take a few detours into closeted celebrities (shout out George Michael) and hidden toilet cams.

Your Mom’s House Ep. 868

https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:04:16 - Short Shorts

00:09:48 - Opening Clip

00:15:42 - Trippy Dave

00:27:15 - Kids These Days are Screwed

00:34:51 - CPAP

00:42:04 - Pazsitzky Effects

00:45:29 - Closeted Celebs

00:55:31 - Christina's Curations

01:06:09 - Worst Cigs

01:14:08 - Hidden Toilet Cams

01:22:27 - Closing Song: Cool Girls Club By Versace Kolache
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Christina P is back touring! Check her out in Chicago September 18th and 19th. Get your tickets at https://christinap.com/pages/tour-dates

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What's up there, chomos! Tom's out. Christina P is holding down the Mommy Dome with Ryan Long, Canadian sketch comedian, content creator, and a man who recently received a cease and desist from a testosterone clinic over a joke photo.

Ryan opens talking acting and shares one of his sketch videos, Doyle the OnlyFans pimp who thought he'd be living the life and spends 90% of his day rating strangers' dicks. They also open the show with Alec Baldwin fully losing his mind at over a missing bag in a video that feels like a parody.

From there: Ontario passed a law allowing all women to go topless in public, the tits you actually see at the nude beach are not the ones you pictured, and Austin has a shirtless jogging epidemic with zero enforcement of chest hair standards. Plus, a cool gal accepting boyfriend applications on TikTok and Christina and Ryan do their civic duty to find her a man. They also review Cowboys for Angels, a straight male gigolo site that Ryan correctly points out uses completely gender-neutral language.

Then a Tulum trip story ends with Christina inserting off-brand suppositories into her hotel mini fridge so they'd stop melting before she could use them, and the cleaning staff tidied the wrappers and put them in a glass jar. She would like you to know they were unused.

Finally, Christina's TikTok Curations: a weather reporter who unexpectedly quotes Edgar Allan Poe, a body percussionist who is simply not ready, a man posting his phone number who specifically says not to ask for money, a woman who attempts parkour and lands on her face then immediately says "I'm fine," and a leg hair identity video. Enjoy!

Your Mom’s House Ep. 867

https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast

Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:04:37 - Opening Clip: Alec Baldwin

00:14:53 - OnlyFans Sketch

00:17:36 - Canadian White Trash

00:28:57 - Lets Help Jenny

00:39:31 - Love for Hire

00:44:21 - Swingers Resorts

00:54:30 - Hairy Canadian Woman

00:59:32 - Christina's Curations

01:11:53 - Closing Song - "How You Say Cucumber" by Micah Akervold
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