This set starts with sandwiches getting painted yellow. It moves into conflict inside the CD players, which probably shouldn’t cause that much tension unless the employee is flirting. Then sandwiches take over. There’s a lot of confusion: who’s touching them, whose sandwich it even is, whether they’re being shared, stolen, burned, or just sat on. Fries and soda catch fire too. The vibe is paranoia and possibly arson. Squirrels show up with violent intent, with unexpected closures, premonitions, and maybe even a murder tally. Naked smoking, strange room guests, and fake relationships round things out in a way that feels a little too normal.
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The CORNDOWN pt 277: with Alden Ehrenreich as Han Solo
This CORNDOWN spins out of control fast, starting with employees being used,possibly emotionally or logistically. That spirals into apple smoking, which feels both literal and like a stand-in for some deeper, metaphorical meaning. But it’s just an apple. There’s tension with police, as usual, something about raspberries being missing, and a whole subplot around someone named Jessica and her Arby’s. Chairs are being moved like they’re forbidden. As things crack further, you get dogs with rabies, chain-based boiler punishments, electrical tape fixes, and meat that might not be okay to eat. Someone’s offering help, but nobody’s actually there. It’s lonely, chaotic, and weird. Just like me.
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The CORNDOWN pt 276: with Michael Turney as Danny Pennington
This CORNDOWN follows a steady escalation of penny-based activity. Tossing, spreading, dropping them in lobbies, even turning them into some kind of mortar or protest or something. There’s also a lot of poor employee driving, repeated and increasingly dramatic, including crashes or wild maneuvering. Meanwhile, there’s gum in my son’s fries, sketchy food combos, and someone handing out slips of paper like they’re evidence. Then ButtEye tries for a fake romantic setup, and there’s a few unusual attempts at entry through windows. By the end, it all folds into pet adoption talk, vape complaints, elevator confusion, and we all get grounded.
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The CORNDOWN pt 275: with Johnny Knoxville as Scrad & Charlie
A strangely intimate look at breakfast and violence—sometimes at the same time. We start with a couple rounds of Ice Cream b/w Violence, bounce through some hotel knob evaluations and best room competitions, and land in a series of escalating calls for just breakfast that spiral into close-quarters smoking and theoretical violence. Blankets and towels get mixed up with paper-based aggression, and wuppy demands breakfast with increasing urgency. Repeated shocks—from outlets and ice cream alike—lead into the mysterious saga of hickeys which somehow gets several calls. Things wrap up with hotel canaries, emotional manipulation, and the always-dangerous offering of the benefit of the doubt.
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The CORNDOWN pt 274: with Tommy Lee Jones as Harvey Dent/Two Face
This one drifts from smoky basements to crumbling online identities. We kick things off with turkey bacon, home smokers, and a lot of weird cigarette gas complaints—some of which seem to involve store employees just absolutely refusing to acknowledge reality. wastedmemory digs into forgotten MySpace alternatives while snappy bakes insists on the existence of “vanilla mothballs.” We spiral into mothball hell before resurfacing for stories about white circles, questionable plumbing, and whatever ends up being the reason for us being there. ButtEye shows up with some bathroom thoughts, wuppy runs into dirty dish problems, and there’s a brief flirtation with jail time, probably over party pricing.
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South Africa