The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast

We talk about this all the time on the Ultimate Intimacy podcast — emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy go hand in hand. You can’t expect a strong sex life if you’re not emotionally connected first.For most people, especially many women desire doesn’t start in the bedroom. It starts with feeling heard, valued, and emotionally safe. If that connection is missing, sexual intimacy often disappears right along with it.That’s why when couples say, “Our intimacy isn’t where we want it to be,” we usually ask them how the emotional connection is, and most the time it isn't connected either.When you focus on listening, showing appreciation, spending intentional time together, and connecting without pressure, walls come down and desire naturally begins to return.And here’s the exciting part... when emotional intimacy improves, sexual intimacy often comes back stronger than ever. Couples become more open, playful, and connected, and intimacy turns into something you both look forward to again.So if you want a better intimate life, don’t skip the foundation.Build emotional closeness first, and watch every part of your marriage thrive.If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why close to 1M people have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!Check out the new UandI App we just released after a year in development.WANT AMAZING PRODUCTS TO SPICE THINGS UP? YES PLEASE... CLICK HEREFollow us on Instagram @ultimateintimacyapp for app updates, polls, giveaways, daily marriage quotes and more.If you have any feedback, comments or topics you would like to hear on future episodes, reach out to us at [email protected] and let us know! We greatly appreciate your feedback and please leave us a review.Enjoy the podcast or have some feedback for us? Shoot us a message!

One of the fastest ways intimacy erodes in marriage is through assumption.We assume our spouse knows what we need.We assume they understand how we feel.We assume love means they should just “get it.”But marriage doesn’t work on mind-reading as we have talked about before, it works on communication.When we assume things, we stop asking questions. And when we stop asking questions, we stop truly knowing our spouse. Over time, those assumptions turn into unmet expectations, and unmet expectations almost always lead to frustration, resentment, or emotional distance.Dr. John Gottman, one of the leading marriage researchers, talks about “bids for connection” the small moments where one spouse reaches out for attention, affection, or understanding. When those bids are ignored, often because of assumptions, couples slowly drift apart. Assumptions also damage sexual intimacy. When one spouse assumes rejection, disinterest, or “now’s not a good time,” desire goes unspoken. Silence replaces vulnerability. And eventually, intimacy feels awkward or distant, not because love is gone, but because communication is.In this episode, Nick and Amy talk about how making assumptions or assuming things in marriage can crate a lot of disconnect and conflict.Healthy marriages don’t assume. They ask.They clarify.They check in.They choose conversation over silence.Because love isn’t proven by how well you guess, it’s proven by how well you listen.If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why close to 1M people have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!Check out the new UandI App we just released after a year in development.WANT AMAZING PRODUCTS TO SPICE THINGS UP? YES PLEASE... CLICK HEREFollow us on Instagram @ultimateintimacyapp for app updates, polls, giveaways, daily marriage quotes and more.If you have any feedback, comments or topics you would like to hear on future episodes, reach out to us at [email protected] and let us know! We greatly appreciate your feedback and please leave us a review.Enjoy the podcast or have some feedback for us? Shoot us a message!

In this episode of The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast, Nick and Amy break down how couples can stop “trying harder” and start creating real, lasting change in their marriage and good marriage goals couples should set for 2026 to help them find Ultimate Intimacy in their relationship.If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why close to 1M people have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!Check out the new UandI App we just released after a year in development.WANT AMAZING PRODUCTS TO SPICE THINGS UP? YES PLEASE... CLICK HEREFollow us on Instagram @ultimateintimacyapp for app updates, polls, giveaways, daily marriage quotes and more.If you have any feedback, comments or topics you would like to hear on future episodes, reach out to us at [email protected] and let us know! We greatly appreciate your feedback and please leave us a review.Enjoy the podcast or have some feedback for us? Shoot us a message!

In many marriages, the higher-desire spouse ends up being the one who always initiates sex. Over time, that dynamic can leave the lower desire spouse feeling pressured, and the higher-desire spouse feeling unwanted or unseen.But here’s the truth: when the lower-desire spouse initiates, it can be incredibly powerful. It communicates love, desire, safety, and “you matter to me” in a way words alone never could.In this episode, Amy and Nick dive into 12 fun, flirty, and confidence-boosting ways the lower-desire spouse can initiate sex with a higher-desire spouse. They also share why sexual intimacy matters so deeply in marriage, and why initiative from the lower-desire spouse can be a total game-changer for connection, trust, and emotional closeness.If you want more passion, more playfulness, and a stronger bond in your marriage, then this episode is for you. 🔥If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why close to 1M people have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!Check out the new UandI App we just released after a year in development.WANT AMAZING PRODUCTS TO SPICE THINGS UP? YES PLEASE... CLICK HEREFollow us on Instagram @ultimateintimacyapp for app updates, polls, giveaways, daily marriage quotes and more.If you have any feedback, comments or topics you would like to hear on future episodes, reach out to us at [email protected] and let us know! We greatly appreciate your feedback and please leave us a review.*This podcast was recorded a few years ago and is a re-run. Enjoy the podcast or have some feedback for us? Shoot us a message!

In most marriages (whether done intentionally or unintentionally), the lower desire spouse typically has complete control and say so when it comes to sex. They determine "if" a couple is going to have sex, "when" they are going to have sex, and everything related to sex in the relationship. Many husbands have expressed to us that they are the higher desire spouse and are scared to initiate sex with their wife for fear of rejection, having it cause an argument or conflict, and many other reasons. Because of this, and the fact that most women have a responsive desire style, many couples are not connecting sexually in their relationship (and often living in sexless marriages, or close to) because sex in the marriage is typically up to the wife.In this podcast episode Nick and Amy discuss the reasons why this is, and how couples can work together to find a balance in their sexual intimacy and relationship where both spouses needs and desires are being met, and sex is something that both spouses have mutual respect and control over in the relationship.If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why close to 1M people have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!Check out the new UandI App we just released after a year in development.WANT AMAZING PRODUCTS TO SPICE THINGS UP? YES PLEASE... CLICK HEREFollow us on Instagram @ultimateintimacyapp for app updates, polls, giveaways, daily marriage quotes and more.If you have any feedback, comments or topics you would like to hear on future episodes, reach out to us at [email protected] and let us know! We greatly appreciate your feedback and please leave us a review.*This episode was recorded and published a few years ago and we released it again.Enjoy the podcast or have some feedback for us? Shoot us a message!