The Groow Zone with Shaunie and Keion Henderson

What do our relationship hangups and boundaries have in common? The Hendersons discuss how unhealthy relationship baggage has the potential to become healthy boundaries. Shaunie explains how establishing a clear marriage mission creates healthy boundaries, and shares how giving Keion the time and space to challenge her painful experiences helped her address relationship trauma. Shaunie also advises men to respect a partner's boundaries while working together towards emotional connection. Keion emphasizes the need for clear communication, consistency, and commitment to establish healthy boundaries. In this episode, we learn how to acknowledge the reasons for our baggage, why it’s important to own our hang-ups and work through them, and when it’s appropriate to present our baggage to a potential partner. Keion encourages us not to let our baggage keep us from growing, reminding us that there is safety in healthy boundaries. Ultimately, baggage only protects the individual while boundaries protect our relationships.For further growth,  Check out Trust: Knowing When to Give It, When to Withhold It, How to Earn It, and How to Fix It When It Gets Broken by Dr. Henry Cloud!

Keion and Shaunie tackle the age-old question: “Can men and women be just friends?” Shaunie raises concerns about the potential for infidelity and the need for setting healthy boundaries. Keion emphasizes the importance of using wisdom: while it’s okay to have friends of the opposite sex, your partner should always be your “safe space” and the person you confide in. They also touch on the idea of remaining friends with exes and the importance of closure before entering a new relationship. In this episode learn why presentation matters when introducing a friend of the opposite sex to your partner, how to ward off potential threats to your relationship, and why respect and transparency are major keys to securing your relationship. Keion believes a healthy relationship requires both partners committing to growing past their insecurities, and dealing with the reality that no one can be everything to their partner. In short, they agree that our relational triggers and trauma will always be a bigger threat to our relationships than any friend of the opposite sex could ever be.

Keion and Shaunie learned everything they know about money the hard way. The Hendersons examine money’s role in the power dynamic of a committed relationship. Shaunie discusses moving from being provided an allowance in her previous marriage to learning the hard way how to be financially independent and save for a rainy day. Reflecting on a recent large expense, Keion emphasizes the importance of financial literacy and his desire to have a more balanced budget in the future. They also break down the politics of helping family members financially, and why open communication is needed between spouses in such situations. In this episode, we learn how to be “fabulous on a budget,” why it’s important to designate a line item in your finances for your spouse, and how to maintain open communication when financial priorities shift. Keion reminds us of scripture, "Where your heart is, your treasure will be also," and that you must ensure your money and your heart are always in the same place.

There’s a certain stigma that accompanies being single in church. Our dynamic hosts get into why presenting marriage as the gold standard for relationships might undermine the benefits of being “saved and single.” Keion reminds us that the consequences for not living a righteous life aren’t reserved for the single members of the church. Shaunie opens up about her experience in the dating pool after her divorce. And she cautions single christians against dating without a goal. In this episode, we learn why there’s a difference between loneliness and being alone, how both marriage and singleness are fulfilling paths, and why enjoying your alone time is crucial to a healthy and happy marriage (should you choose it!). Who you are as a single person has a profound impact on how you show up in marriage. As Keion says, “successful marriages aren't made up of two halves, but two whole people.” Above all else, Keion and Shaunie remind us that no matter your relationship status–single or married, satisfied or seeking–God sees you, values you, and loves you right where you are.For further growth, check out: 7 Myths About Singleness by Sam Allberry!