346 episodes
346: Your In-law Issues Uncovered: Boundaries, Expectations and Listener Write-in's
2026/07/13 | 39 mins.Marriage doesn't just bring two people together. It also brings together different families, expectations, traditions, and experiences. Today we're talking honestly about some of the most common challenges that come with in-law relationships, from feeling the weight of comparison to navigating boundaries and unmet expectations. While we can't solve every complicated family dynamic, we hope this conversation reminds you that your feelings are valid, you're not alone, and you and your partner can work together to build the family culture you want.
Key Topics Covered:
Why comparison between grandparents is natural and how to appreciate different ways of showing love
How healthy boundaries protect relationships instead of damaging them
Ways couples can stay united when navigating difficult family dynamics
Practical ideas for handling extended visits, grandparent favoritism, and differing expectations
Why speaking up gives family members the opportunity to make positive changes
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This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.- Whether you're climbing the corporate ladder, building a business, negotiating a raise, or wondering if it's time for a career change, this conversation is full of practical advice for every stage of your professional journey. We sit down with leadership coach and Growth Inc. founder Colleen Bordeaux to talk about redefining success, advocating for yourself, navigating burnout, and building a career that actually fits your life. If you've ever felt overlooked, stuck, or unsure of your next step, this episode will help you approach your career with more confidence and clarity.
Key Topics Covered:
Why asking for a raise starts with owning your value
How leadership requires letting go of perfectionism and control
Questions to ask when you're deciding whether to stay or leave your current role
Why your career doesn't have to follow a traditional path
A different way to think about burnout and creating a more fulfilling career
CONNECT WITH COLLEEN:
Growth, Inc. Instagram (@growthincubator): https://www.instagram.com/growthincubator
Colleen’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/colleenbordeaux
TikTok: https://www.instagram.com/growthincubator
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HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast
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MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer
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This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network. - When it comes to dating your spouse, how often should you actually be going on dates? We started asking ourselves that question and quickly realized the answer depends on your relationship, your season of life, and what helps you feel connected. We share how our own approaches to dating have evolved over the years, from weekly nights out to low effort basement dates and small moments of connection throughout the week. We also dive into the research on dating your spouse, debate what actually counts as a date, and talk about why regular check-ins matter more than following someone else's rules.
Key Topics Covered:
The research behind dating your spouse, including the "gold standard" of weekly dates and the 2/2/2 method.
Why Amy and Drew and Abby and Colin have completely different dating styles, and how their needs have evolved as their kids and schedules have changed.
The debate over whether group dates count as dates and why couples may have different definitions of quality time.
How to have honest conversations with your partner about feeling connected, sharing the mental load, and getting on the same page.
Why meaningful connection can happen in everyday moments and does not always require elaborate plans or expensive nights out.
LINKS AND RESOURCES:
FORAGE KITCHEN: Check out your nearest location
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HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast
HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast
MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer
MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen
This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network. - Growing up as millennials, we were often told not to be too loud, not to ask for help, and to push our feelings down. Attachment therapist and author Eli Harwood joins us to unpack how our upbringings shaped us and how we can break generational cycles as parents. Eli opens with a powerful reframe: our parents truly did the best they could with what they knew. From there, we dive deep into what childhood trauma actually looks like (and why so many of us don't recognize it as trauma), how to build resilience in our kids, and why the way we parent almost always traces back to how we were parented. Whether you struggle with patience, saying no, or knowing when to discipline versus when to have a conversation, Eli offers practical, connection-focused tools to help us show up differently for our kids.
Key Topics Covered:
What secure attachment looks like and why Eli centers her work on connection and relationship rather than control and behavior.
How to identify the childhood experiences you may be carrying into adulthood without realizing they are traumas.
Finding the middle ground between raising independent kids and raising kids who feel safe asking for help.
The number one predictor of long-term resilience in children and how to actively foster it.
Why millennial parents may struggle with patience, and why the birthing parent often has less of it than their non-birthing partner.
Punishment versus conversation: how to rethink your approach when your child does something wrong.
Why saying no feels so hard for millennial parents and what to do if you want to change that pattern.
CONNECT WITH ELI:
Instagram & Threads (@attachmentnerd): https://www.instagram.com/attachmentnerd/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/attachmentnerd
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@attachmentnerd
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@attachmentnerd
Get Your Copy of Eli’s Book: https://amzlink.to/az09tHmrRU6NT
LINKS AND RESOURCES:
BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself
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Let’s connect!
HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast
MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer
MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen
This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network. - Abby's 40th birthday served as the perfect launching pad for an honest conversation about aging and all the feelings that come with it. With most of our 30s spent raising kids, we are stepping into this new decade with a fresh perspective, and we're keeping it real about the insecurities, the mindset shifts, and the things we actively do to feel and look our best. We also explore the power of having older women in our lives as role models, share a meaningful mantra from Abby's grandma, and wrap up with a reminder that making peace with aging is so much easier when you're surrounded by people who own it unapologetically.
Key Topics Covered:
Finding your personal balance between embracing aging and doing the things that make you feel confident and youthful.
How dressing for your changing body can support a more positive relationship with it.
The reality of working out as you get older, including injuries and setbacks, and knowing you're not alone in facing them.
Why surrounding yourself with people who are unapologetic about their age can shift your entire outlook.
LINKS AND RESOURCES:
LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase: drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF
BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself
Patreon Book Club: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast
Hair Supplement: https://amzlink.to/az0kELnE6fNiV
Let’s connect!
HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast
MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer
MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen
This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.
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About HERself
As women and mothers of young children, it can be easy to compare ourselves to others. But your life isn't supposed to look like hers! Being your best self means standing firm in your decisions and always being willing to grow with a purpose. Are you wanting more ease in your marriage? Or more enjoyment as a parent? Are you looking for a strategy to the health challenges you have been facing recently? Do you feel like you have been staring at a stranger in the mirror since becoming a mother? Abby and Amy get vulnerable with topics around partnership, motherhood, health, and self improvement by interviewing authors, therapists, experts and everyday mothers. Our conversations will meet you with solutions and solidarity as you find a life path that feels aligned for you. If this sounds like you, hit play on your favorite episode title and make sure you're following the HERself podcast.
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