HERself

This week, we’re answering your questions straight from Instagram, and a clear theme emerged: relationships. From navigating constant arguments after the kids go to bed to figuring out how to move forward when you and your partner feel completely out of sync, we’re sharing honest insights, personal experiences, and practical mindset shifts that have made a real difference in our own marriages. We talk through what it looks like to step into your partner’s perspective, why some relationship challenges aren’t actually “fixable,” and how to approach them in a way that works for your unique dynamic. We also open up about intimacy, including the factors that impact sex drive and why this conversation matters more than we often admit.

Topics We Cover:
• A counterintuitive strategy that helped break the cycle of nightly arguments.
• How differing timelines and priorities can create tension in relationships.
• A mindset shift that can help you better understand your partner’s perspective.
• What to consider when small annoyances start turning into constant nitpicking.
• Why some household tasks may not be the best ones to delegate.
• The difference between “equal” and “fair” when it comes to division of labor.
• Why many relationship challenges aren’t fully solvable and how to navigate that reality.
• The two types of sex drive and how they show up in long-term relationships.
• Two common factors that can significantly impact intimacy.

LINKS AND RESOURCES:
Listen to Episode 21 with Vanessa Marin, Sex Therapist: https://www.herselfpodcast.com/listen/21-herself-expert-vanessa-marin-sex-therapist-all-of-your-sex-questions-answered

LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase:  drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF 

HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

This episode was inspired by a post from one of our favorite Instagram therapy accounts, @millennial.therapist, titled “Let’s Stop Postponing.” It sparked an honest conversation as we walked through each point and reflected on how these patterns show up in our own lives. From expressing appreciation to making decisions, navigating emotions, and leaning into joy, we share where we feel confident, where we are still growing, and how these small shifts can create meaningful change in our everyday lives.

Key Topics Covered:
Letting people know what they mean to you and the impact of expressing appreciation in real time.
Navigating big decisions with more trust and less hesitation, with different personal perspectives.
Allowing space for emotional release instead of holding everything in.
Taking accountability and offering genuine apologies when needed.
Asking for support and clearly communicating personal needs.
Approaching hard conversations with more confidence and emotional maturity.
Wearing clothes that make you feel good instead of saving them for later.
Exploring hobbies and rediscovering what feels fun and fulfilling.
Celebrating small, everyday moments instead of only major milestones.

LINKS AND RESOURCES:

Follow Dr. Sara Kuburic on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/millennial.therapist/

BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

After Amy sparked a conversation on Instagram about expecting more independence from her boys, it became clear just how many moms are wondering the same thing: when do you start, and how do you actually follow through? In this episode, we’re sharing how we’ve gradually increased expectations in our own homes, why contributing to the household matters, and how to get your kids involved in a realistic, sustainable way..

Key Topics Covered:
When to start expecting more independence from kids.
Why contributing to the household builds confidence and responsibility.
The importance of predictable routines at home.
Practical ways kids can help with laundry, kitchen tasks, and shared spaces.
Managing clutter in mudrooms and sports bags.
How to handle different expectations for siblings of different ages.
A helpful mindset shift for explaining responsibilities to kids.
How personality types can influence chores and participation.
Why starting small leads to long-term success for both kids and parents.

LINKS AND RESOURCES:

HERSELF AMAZON STOREFRONT: https://amzlink.to/az0BrkLl5pX9u 

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

Hormones, sleep, nutrition… or something else entirely? When your body starts to feel “off,” it’s not always easy to pinpoint what’s actually going on, especially during perimenopause. In this episode, we are so excited to sit down with Dr. Mary Claire Haver; board-certified OB/GYN, Certified Culinary Medicine Specialist, Certified Menopause Provider, and the founder of The ‘Pause Wellness, a private medical practice that focuses on women in midlife. She is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The New Menopause and The Galveston Diet. In our conversation she breaks down what’s really happening in your body, how to recognize the signs of perimenopause, and what you can start doing today to feel better.

Key Topics Covered:
How to tell if you’re in perimenopause vs. dealing with poor sleep or nutrition.
Why there’s no definitive test for perimenopause.
Early vs. late perimenopause and what to expect in each stage.
Surprising symptoms like heart palpitations, lung changes, and asthma.
The connection between hormones and sleep disruptions.
Practical, free strategies to manage cognitive and physical symptoms.
Why hormone testing isn’t always recommended.
Barriers to accessing quality women’s healthcare.
A positive perspective on life after menopause.

LINKS AND RESOURCES:

Get Your Copy of Dr. Mary Claire’s Book, The New Perimonopause: https://amzlink.to/az0qY10JJZQNx

Visit Dr. Mary Claire’s Website: https://thepauselife.com/

Follow Dr. Mary Claire on Socials: 

TikTok: @drmaryclaire
Instagram: @drmaryclaire
Facebook: @drmaryclaire
YouTube: @maryclairehavermd8473

LMNT: Free Sample Pack with purchase:  drinkLMNT.com/HERSELF 
Our Favorite Perimenopause Products: Affiliate Links 
HERSELF PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/herselfpodcast

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to other women and feeling jealous, intimidated, or like you’re somehow behind. But what if you could shift that mindset and instead feel genuinely inspired by the success around you? In this episode, we share a recent real-life experience from a mastermind we attended with highly successful business owners and how it challenged us to see comparison differently. Instead of letting the “small fish in a big sea” feeling discourage us, we used it as proof of what’s possible. We talk about the mindset shift that helped us move from comparison to inspiration, why personal growth plays a huge role in that process, and how surrounding yourself with the right people can change the way you view your own potential.

In this episode, we discuss:

What it felt like walking into a room full of highly successful entrepreneurs.
The surprising common habits we noticed among women operating at a high level.
Why taking care of your physical health often supports long-term success.
The “highlight reel vs. inner life” trap and why it distorts how we see other people’s journeys.
Questions to ask yourself when someone else's success triggers comparison.
The hidden sacrifices and personal work that often sit behind visible success.
Practical ways to shift from jealousy to curiosity and inspiration.
Why your mindset about others’ success can either hold you back or move you forward.
How getting support, such as a mindset coach, can help you break out of negative thought patterns.
The powerful question to ask when a negative thought about someone else pops up.

LINKS AND RESOURCES:

BETTERHELP: 10% off first month at: http://betterhelp.com/herself

Let’s connect!

HERSELF INSTAGRAM: http://instagram.com/herselfpodcast

MEET AMY: http://instagram.com/ameskiefer

MEET ABBY: http://instagram.com/abbyrosegreen

This episode was brought to you by the Pivot Ball Change Network.