i got asked about imposter syndrome recently, there's definitely some overlap with comparing yourself to others (see previous video) but i made this video as an add on/extension. let me know your thoughts as always please!! my skin looks so bad here but i was too lazy to put a filter on so i'm keeping it 99 !!!xx02:30 - everyone is a newbie at some point03:28 - confidence revised04:10 - life is a project, performance art!05:09 - confident people won’t judge you or put you down05:36 - lock in on your purpose07:10 - don’t always assume competition08:04 - understanding your projections08:21 - make friends, connect over common experience09:09 - recognize the unpredictability of each person’s journey09:40 - healthy competition09:59 - embrace your uniqueness10:16 - what your know vs who you know10:50 - understanding nepotism11:55 - build your own thing instead of feeling like you need to be allowed into someone else’s project13:28 - redefine success 14:40 - diversify your focus and interests15:19 - legally blonde - elle woods is an icon!18:10 - redefine purposefollow me on IG ☆ https://instagram.com/amberakilla/dead or alive summer 2025 playlist !!!https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1lezLPXhmrrrs1wD4GzDnI?si=108bae9312df4374slay habit trackers ☆ free downloadhttps://www.friendcrush.club/shop/p/hot-girl-slay-habits-e-bundlesubscribe for full episodes, exclusive episodes & perks! ♡patreon.com/amberakillahttps://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/subscribehttps://instagram.com/friend.crush/https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakillahttps://www.youtube.com/@amberakillahttps://twitter.com/amberakillahttps://soundcloud.com/amberakillahttps://open.spotify.com/user/amberakilla
--------
21:20
--------
21:20
hot girls don't let comparison be the thief of joy
talking through the mental blocks that can occur when we get stuck on comparing ourselves to others in a way that hinders our ability to be HOT and HAVE FUN !!!03:33 - radical acceptance05:11 - practicing gratitude07:07 - set intentions07:52 - lean into irony when being serious feels like a joke08:37 - abundance vs delusion09:45 - your mindset affects your decision making11:00 - awareness + intentional action11:28 - practice connecting with your experience of life11:41 - you will face challenges no matter what13:10 - rejection is protection and redirection14:14 - nobody knows what they’re doing15:58 - other people’s success are evidence of what is possible18:03 - be honest with yourself about the lengths you will go18:25 - your own story unfolds through action, not comparison19:27 - additional thoughts20:22 - there's more than just what you think or have been told is 'success'21:00 - understanding your validation needs22:28 - how my idea of success as a DJ has changed over timefollow me on IG ☆ https://instagram.com/amberakilla/dead or alive summer 2025 playlist !!!https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1lezLPXhmrrrs1wD4GzDnI?si=108bae9312df4374slay habit trackers ☆ free downloadhttps://www.friendcrush.club/shop/p/hot-girl-slay-habits-e-bundlesubscribe for full episodes, exclusive episodes & perks! ♡patreon.com/amberakillahttps://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/subscribehttps://instagram.com/friend.crush/https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakillahttps://www.youtube.com/@amberakillahttps://twitter.com/amberakillahttps://soundcloud.com/amberakillahttps://open.spotify.com/user/amberakilla
--------
25:46
--------
25:46
what to do when you don't know what to do
that overwhelming "wtf" feeling01:54 - context can differ, dyanmic/feelings are usually consistent02:45 - its better to do something, rather than nothing03:12 - don’t let perfect be the enemy of good04:06 - learn to be a beginner05:23 - what i learnt during the panini (external changes)06:43 - noticing the negative thought pattern: “when x happens, then i can be happy”06:48 - lean into how you feel - anything repressed/suppressed will start to infect your life07:31 - getting sick of yourself07:37 - what would your younger self/future self think08:43 - follow your curiosity11:06 - there is so much you can’t control/ certainty is an illusion11:38 - 20% of the work for 80% of the outcomes12:03 - saying yes to random opportunties13:37 - find something to anchor you and organize your time around14:37 - you can’t always predict how things will unfold15:08 - internal transition phases15:27 - trying is better than nothing17:03 - the outcome and structure forms as you go17:10 - it doesn’t have to be related - focus on enjoying17:48 - do it because you want to - not because of what you think other people will think18:14 - what other people think is a collateral benefit18:35 - you can do something you enjoy and it still be difficult19:00 - things will be hard regardless20:24 - don’t wait for the world to change or give you permission21:16 - the value of small steps over complete overhauls21:46 - focus on being present22:14 - you can’t think your way into the present moment22:30 - cutting down on social media25:14 - you never know what’s going to happen!!!follow me on IG ☆ https://instagram.com/amberakilla/dead or alive summer 2025 playlist !!!https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1lezLPXhmrrrs1wD4GzDnI?si=108bae9312df4374slay habit trackers ☆ free downloadhttps://www.friendcrush.club/shop/p/hot-girl-slay-habits-e-bundlesubscribe for full episodes, exclusive episodes & perks! ♡patreon.com/amberakillahttps://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/subscribehttps://instagram.com/friend.crush/https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakillahttps://www.youtube.com/@amberakillahttps://twitter.com/amberakillahttps://soundcloud.com/amberakillahttps://open.spotify.com/user/amberakilla
--------
25:57
--------
25:57
growth doesn't have an aesthetic
a short video with a gentle reminder that your mental/spiritual/emotional growth doesn't have to look a certain way in order to be valid. maybe your physical and mental glow up happens at the same time and it will be more effective when you are intentional about integrating the range of skills and experiences required - many of which i discuss in previous video and podcast content. please share your thoughts and experiences in the comments!!!love ya xxfollow me on IG ☆ https://instagram.com/amberakilla/dead or alive summer 2025 playlist !!!https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1lezLPXhmrrrs1wD4GzDnI?si=108bae9312df4374slay habit trackers ☆ free downloadhttps://www.friendcrush.club/shop/p/hot-girl-slay-habits-e-bundlesubscribe for full episodes, exclusive episodes & perks! ♡patreon.com/amberakillahttps://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/subscribehttps://instagram.com/friend.crush/https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakillahttps://www.youtube.com/@amberakillahttps://twitter.com/amberakillahttps://soundcloud.com/amberakillahttps://open.spotify.com/user/amberakilla
--------
11:46
--------
11:46
a woman's ego in dating ~ eating dim sum in wuhan
pairing an excerpt from my voice memo podcast series with this footage of me eating dim sum between a soundcheck and standby while i was on a job earlier this year in wuhan hehe ~ i mention fengshui changes, what one of my friend's recent dating situations prompted in reflecting on a woman's ego in dating and what stops me from entertaining low effort romantic opportunities #realizingthingsmy voice memo podcast series are more casual and personal, i give life updates, spill tea, answer listener questions, share recent thoughts/test topics that may eventually become stand alone videos or episodes. come join the partyyy *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ thank you to anyone that has been supporting already! ily ♡ let me know your thoughts and if you like this format !!! i can pair vlog-ish content with voice over chitchat so you have the option to watch or just have on in the background and listen!voice memo 53 - full episode on spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0NK2MYu1dcPToSL9H5g3Ee?si=2443923415644589voice memo 53 - full episode on patreon: https://www.patreon.com/posts/voice-memo-53-in-131721472?utm_medium=clipboard_copy&utm_source=copyLink&utm_campaign=postshare_creator&utm_content=join_linkfollow me on IG ☆ https://instagram.com/amberakilla/dead or alive summer 2025 playlist !!!https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1lezLPXhmrrrs1wD4GzDnI?si=108bae9312df4374slay habit trackers ☆ free downloadhttps://www.friendcrush.club/shop/p/hot-girl-slay-habits-e-bundlesubscribe for full episodes, exclusive episodes & perks! ♡patreon.com/amberakillahttps://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/friend-crush/subscribehttps://instagram.com/friend.crush/https://www.tiktok.com/@amberakillahttps://www.youtube.com/@amberakillahttps://twitter.com/amberakillahttps://soundcloud.com/amberakillahttps://open.spotify.com/user/amberakilla
Subscriber episodes also available on Patreon! https://patreon.com/amberakilla Welcome to Friend Crush with Amber Akilla! I am an Australian Chinese multi-hyphenate working in music and the creative industry. I am currently based in Shanghai, China. This is a space where I share my cute, chaotic and critical thoughts around friendship, love, relationships, dating, memes, pop culture, politics, self-help, self-empowerment and more ☆ come and join the party so you ensure you are staying hot & having fun!!! ♡ ♡ ♡
South Africa