GIRLBLOGGER: THE PODCAST

Jennifer Lopez looks like sh!t and Julia Roberts spewed hate during her award presentation! Well, not exactly, but both of those statements are versions of takes I have on this year's Golden Globes. Listen to me share my thoughts on host Nikki Glaser, Ariana Grande's eyebrows, and Paul Thomas Anderson's tendency to flip-flop in catering between gays and straights. After all that noise, I move on to the more peaceful topic of a violent horror film about a rabid chimpanzee. I highly suggest everyone go see the movie Primate (2025) if you want to develop a phobia of monkeys! Then on to more serious things like Mattel's new autistic Barbie. I just ordered one! I cannot wait to play with her fidget spinner and her alternative communication tablet! Lastly, I play some clips of Hilary Duff's raunchy new single, "Roommates". Who knew that Lizzie McGuire could be such a little harlot! Listen now <3

"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullsh!t" These are the words we're living by in our year of 2026! Please pray that this year will bring goodness into our world other than a show about gay hockey players. Things were pretty bleak in 2025! Anyway, this episode has a great handful of fun topics. First, I must dive into Bianca Censori's latest endeavors as an on-stage performance artist. Apparently, if you want to put on a show, all you need is five contortionist models to wear masks of your face and then pose as furniture. It's a surefire way to turn heads! Next, I can't help but bring up Nicki Minaj's bizarre and unfortunate new political identity. Does she really think a red hat over a pink wig is going to make the Barbz happy?! Because it has not. Next I discuss the new Josh Safdie film, Marty Supreme (2025). The film is the equivalent to a chicken with it's head cutoff. That said, I very much enjoyed the movie and Timothée did not use a butt double for his spanking scene! Lastly, I have to pick apart the "toxic mom group" article that Ashley Tisdale (French?) insisted on writing for The Cut. Spoiler alert: Ashley is tone-deaf. Listen now! <3

We came to the cottage... and our lives changed forever. This episode me and my gay bff Connor (@connorxbowman) do a deep dive into the best show ever created. I am of course talking about the gay hockey romance sensation that is known as Heated Rivalry. I mention several times in this episode that this show has changed my body chemistry, and I assure you that I'm being completely sincere. That's because not only does this show tantalize us with perfectly sculpted hockey asses, but it also delivers the most powerful love story ever told. That is the love between yearning athletes, and a smoothie barista, as they try to navigate the stigma around homosexual romance. Needless to say, we cannot get enough of this show, so we break down each episode and share every last thought we have to give on this masterpiece. Listen now! <3

What exactly is love? Well, apparently it consists of workplace infidelity, HR violations, language barriers, and confessing your infatuation to your best friend's wife via cue cards. Yes! This episode me and my girl Olivia Krauss (@oliviakrauss) discuss not only the morally corrupt film Love, Actually (2003) but also the timeless classic, Home Alone (1990) which we discover is an equally odd film when analyzed with an ounce of logic. Why exactly do we love this movie about an abandoned 8-year-old that physically abuses home intruders? Regardless, we watch both these films every year. They both bring us Christmas cheer whether we are hate watching or love watching. Merry Christmas! Listen now! <3

Just when you think things can't get nay more bleak... they do! Yes, we have more unfortunate news. Sadly, we have lost yet another Hollywood icon with the passing of Rob Reiner. Also, to add insult to injury, he was allegedly stabbed to death by his own son alongside his wife. It's not exactly the type of surprise we like to receive during the holidays, but here we are. Pour one out for Rob Reiner by rewatching Misery (1990). Next up is not much more uplifting, Diddy: The Reckoning! The new doc series all about Diddy on Netflix really captures who Puff Daddy really is... a desperate wannabe! After that, I recap another Netflix program called The Beast In Me which stars Claire Danes. Was anyone else confusing her with Aileen Wuornos while watching this? Finally, I give my harsh critique on both the book and the new film adaptation of The Housemaid (2025). Is it too much to ask that a twisted suburban psychological thriller just be a little more flamboyant?! So many missed opportunities. Oh, and I also tell a story about how my best friend gaslit me into a fit of delirium. Listen now! <3