Finding You: with Dr. Brad Reedy

A Child's Greatest Burden

Jung believed that the heaviest thing a child carries is the unlived life of the parent. He wasn't talking about the parent who chased a dream and fell short. He meant the life a parent avoided: the risks never taken, the fears never faced, the feelings never allowed. That unfinished business doesn't disappear. It gets handed down. In this episode, Dr. Brad Reedy explores how children absorb what we avoid, often more than what we say. Wherever a parent is stuck, the child tends to take that on as a roadmap. They either repeat it or spend a lifetime running from it.

Drawing on Jung, Winnicott's false self, Alice Miller's The Drama of the Gifted Child, and Bowlby's work on how attachment passes between generations, Brad looks at what our children actually inherit: our shame, our anxiety, our blurred boundaries, and the parts of ourselves we've kept in the dark. The hardest part is also the most hopeful. When we make our children our project, we often dodge our real responsibility, which is to make our own lives the project.

Brad walks through differentiation, the difference between enmeshment, cut-off, and healthy connection, and why the greatest gift we can give a child is a regulated nervous system and a clear sense of self. Take-home themes: learn what is yours and what isn't. Take responsibility for your own peace. Know the difference between loving a child and needing to be loved by one. Get busy with your life. Follow your bliss. It ends with you.

Upcoming: AMA: Thursday, Sept 24, 6:00 PM MT
Art of Living Retreat Center: Sept 27–Oct 2 (artoflivingretreatcenter.org)
Ketamine Therapy Intensive: Oct 29–31,
Salt Lake City Finding You Intensives: Oct 7–11, Oct 16–18 (online), Nov 11–15 (couples), Dec 2–6, Jan 6–10, Feb 10–14 (couples)
Alumni Zoom: third Wednesday monthly OPLM support groups: Saturdays, oplm.com Inquiries: info@findingyouprograms.com
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Why don't we do the things we know would bring us closer to the people we love?

We're not short on instructions. Speak your truth. Tell your story. Be vulnerable. But a script for intimacy doesn't create intimacy - because the barrier was never knowing what to say. It's what happens in your body when you try.

Last night's episode: Creating Intimacy. The shift from doing to being, why "just communicate better" doesn't move the needle, and what actually makes closeness possible - with your partner, your kids, your friends.

Listen wherever you get your podcasts. Link in bio.

#FindingYouPodcast #DrBradReedy #Intimacy #Relationships #Attachment #CouplesTherapy #MentalHealth #Therapy #Podcast #SelfWork #ConsciousRelationships #EmotionalHealth
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Dr. Reedy talks about how in marriage we often project onto our partners things which are our responsibility. He explains that when we ask our partners to be responsible for our peace, we will use punishment to manipulate and control them. He explains that individual work must form the foundation of the work we do in couples. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dr. Reedy, discusses mythology and the Odyssey. He explains that the story of Odysseus and his journey home is about the journey back to ourselves. He emphasizes the patience required to reverse this journey. He talks about the costs we pay along the way. And eventually, like Odysseus, the new version of ourselves may become unrecognizable and unacceptable to the people that expect us to be who we were. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dr. Reedy discusses the impact on the development of the child when a warm, resonant part is present. He discusses the impact of affluence on a family's process around boundaries. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.