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Living Emunah By Rabbi David Ashear

Rabbi David Ashear
Living Emunah By Rabbi David Ashear
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  • Catapult Into Greatness
    There are people who have to endure enormous yisurim in this world. Some are not able to leave their hospital bed. Some have been abandoned by their family. Some don't have any family. Not only do they have challenges beyond imagination, but they have nobody by their side helping them through them. A common denominator in challenges is usually thoughts of why is Hashem doing this to me? Am I so bad? What could I have possibly done in the previous lifetime to deserve all this? All they want is just to have a normal life like everybody else. Some even feel that Hashem hates them, lo alenu. We can never judge anybody. Nobody truly knows how difficult a person's circumstances are. And we hope and pray that they improve quickly. However, we must understand the way Hashem views yisurim. The pasuk says, כי את אשר יאהב ה' יוכיח. It is the ones that Hashem loves most that have to endure yisurim like this. The Mesilat Yesharim reminds us our purpose in coming into this world is not for this world. We are here to acquire eternal life in Olam HaBa. This world is a drop in the ocean compared to the Next World. A person has a very limited amount of time in this world to do a job that will earn him the right to live blissfully forever. The Pesikta Rabbati in parashat Achareh Mot says, Fortunate is the person who has to endure difficult yisurim in this world and does not complain to Hashem over it. Who had more difficult yisurim than Iyov? Rav Chaninah bar Pappah said, If Iyov would not have complained about his yisurim, the same way we say אלוקי אברהם, אלוקי יצחק, ואלוקי יעקב in the Amidah, we would have added אלוקי איוב as well. This statement is mind-boggling. It implies that Iyov would have been elevated to the same status as the Avot HaKedoshim had he accepted his yisurim. Our Avot dedicated every moment of their lives to Hashem. They became the greatest people who ever lived. How could it be that Iyov would have been considered on their level? This is how valuable it is for a person to trust Hashem and accept the way He deals with them. The more difficult a person has it, the greater is his opportunity to elevate himself. We only came into this world to achieve that purpose. Some become great through tireless avodat Hashem, day in and day out. Some can reach greatness with just a few words out of their mouths. If with all the difficulties they are going through and all the questions they may have and all the potential hard feelings they have towards Hashem, if they could change their attitude and say, "Hashem, I trust You. I know You're the only One in charge of my life and You are giving me the exact life that I need to fulfill my purpose in this world." That will make them great. Those words can elevate them to be counted amongst the greats of the generation and perhaps the greats of all time. We hope the yisurim will go away quickly, but before they do, the person should seize his opportunity while he has it to catapult himself into greatness, to attain the highest portions in the Next World. The value of accepting yisurin is beyond comprehension. That is precisely why it's so difficult to do. If we can persevere and accept the way Hashem deals with us, we'll rise to the highest levels and we'll be eternally rewarded.
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  • Bitachon and Geula
    The Rambam writes the purpose of the fast is to get us to remember the bad deeds that caused the destruction and then accept upon ourselves to fix them. The main cause of the churban was people hating each other. If our bitachon in Hashem would be stronger, there would be no room for hatred because we would believe b'emunah shelemah that everything, even what people do to us, is caused by Hashem for our best. Chazal tell us, the first Tisha B'Av of calamity was when the people cried from the words of the meraglim , which was due to their lack of bitachon in Hashem. If they would have trusted in Hashem, they wouldn't have been afraid of anybody. When we truly believe that there is only Hashem in this world and nothing else, we will be able to rectify all the sins that have prolonged this galut . The Gemara tells us, Mashiach will come אם בקולו תשמעון – when we heed Hashem's voice and nobody else's. The Shomer Emunim writes, when a person's bitachon is the way it is supposed to be, he will be able to overcome so many tests that the yetzer hara gets people to fall to. When a man is walking in the street in the summertime and wants to guard his eyes from seeing the wrong things, the evil inclination will tell him he needs to be on the lookout in case he sees somebody he needs to speak with or in case he sees a store that he needs to go to. And once the person's guard is down, he will undoubtedly see things he is forbidden to look at. A person with bitachon in Hashem will say, "I will not lose by following Hashem's will. If there is somebody I need to speak with, Hashem will send him to me." A person who is careful not to talk to others before he prays in the morning may have his evil inclination tell him, What if the person next to you now could help you? Maybe it is worth it to talk to him. Someone with bitachon would say, "If I accepted upon myself a stringency to honor Hashem, there is no way I will lose anything as a result." A concerned mother who is trying to get her daughter married may think, maybe I should compromise a little on my daughter's standards of modesty so she will get married quicker. If her bitachon was where it was supposed to be, she would immediately say to herself, "The One who is in charge of marriage has a standard that He loves. It doesn't make any sense for me to compromise on His standard if He is the One producing the shidduch ." A woman who just started the Amida hears the doorbell ring and doesn't know who it is, the yetzer hara will tell her, Rush through your prayers so that you can go see who it is . If her bitachon was strong, she would say, "I am talking to the One who is in control of the entire world. Does it matter which one of His puppets is at my door right now?" If a person is learning Torah and the yetzer hara tells him if he leaves early to tend to his affairs, it'll be so much better for him. Bitachon will say, "I am doing the will of Hashem now, I'll only gain if I stay." Hashem will not necessarily make it obvious to a person that he gained by doing the right thing, but that is only to keep a person's free will balanced. When our bitachon is strong, our middot will be the way they are supposed to be. We won't be arrogant, we won't get angry, we won't be jealous, and we'll be happy to do the job that Hashem sent us here to do. Let us resolve today to strengthen our bitachon in Hashem and, b'ezrat Hashem, that will be the zechut we need to bring the geula shelemah . Amen. תזכו בנחמת ציון .
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  • The Secret to Blessing
    The Beit HaMikdash was destroyed because of sinat chinam , which is usually translated to mean baseless hatred. Rav Elya Lopian writes, any hatred which is not sanctioned by halacha is called baseless. Many times people justify why they are permitted to hate another individual. They may even convince themselves that it is a mitzvah to hate. But in the majority of cases, it's just the evil inclination getting them to sin. Hatred is rarely permitted. Rather than justifying our reasons for hating, we should be looking to do just the opposite and go out of our way to show love. Hashem loves when we are at peace with each other. If we have a hard time doing it ourselves, we should do it for Him. I read a story about a man who had one child, a son who was very successful in his Torah learning. When it came time for him to get married, he was told of a girl with the finest qualities. However, after further investigation, they found out that she had a very low level of hearing. The boy did not want to pursue the shidduch . The father of the girl told the father of the boy he would give the boy as a dowry for his daughter one million shekels. The boy's father really wanted his son to be able to learn with peace of mind and he did not have the funds to support him. The girl did have sterling middot and was able to hear, albeit with difficulty. They agreed to go out and, soon enough, the shidduch was finalized. A couple of months after the wedding, the father of the girl informed the couple that the million shekels that he gave them was actually a loan he took out and put in their names. He basically lied to get his daughter married. The young man obviously had no way of paying back that debt, especially since he used most of the money to buy an apartment. And he honestly didn't want to have anything to do with his father-in-law anymore. He went to Rav Chaim Kanievsky z"l, to ask what to do. Rav Chaim told him to overcome his natural inclination and give honor to his father-in-law, despite what he did, and everything would be fine. The boy obediently listened. On Yom Kippur, he bought his father-in-law a very special aliyah and on Simchat Torah he bought him another one. This boy was learning in the Mir Yeshiva and since he came from America, he learned with a group of American boys. One day, a new boy came to the yeshiva and he was very homesick. He wasn't happy with his bed, the food was not to his taste, and he wanted to go home. He was also an only child to his parents. When the newly married young man found out about this boy's problems, he tried to give him chizuk . He told him he was also an only child and he also had a hard time when he started out in the yeshiva, but now he loves it. He offered to learn with this boy chavruta and the boy accepted. That Chanukah, this boy's father, who is extremely wealthy, took his private jet to Israel to visit his son. While there, his son told him of how this nice young man saved his entire year and how much he loves the yeshiva because of him. His father was so appreciative, he asked the young man what he could do to help him. The young man, seeing how wealthy this man was, told him about the million shekel debt and how it happened. The wealthy man happily went and paid back the debt in full. Rav Chaim knew that the secret to blessing is when a person goes against his inclination and loves people instead of hating. If we could all find it within ourselves to get rid of any hatred we have and give love and honor instead, b'ezrat Hashem we will turn the sad day of Tisha B'Av into the greatest holiday, celebrating the rebuilding of the Beit HaMikdash . Amen.
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  • When Hashem Sends a Message
    A man told me that his wife had been a little negligent about something he had asked her to do multiple times. Unfortunately, as a result, their children were placed in a potentially dangerous situation. Baruch Hashem, everything worked out in the end, but he was extremely upset. He felt his wife had put their children in danger unnecessarily, and he had every reason to be shaken. Later that same day, while at home, he decided to learn a bit. The only sefer easily available was an ArtScroll volume of Masechet Shabbat. He randomly opened it to daf 32 ( ל״ב ), where the Gemara discusses how serious it is to place oneself in a dangerous situation. Reading it made him feel validated in how upset he was with his wife. But then, just a few lines later, he read something that shook him to the core: the Gemara says that someone who neglects learning Torah causes danger to their children. He read the line again and again. Suddenly, it hit him — he himself had been negligent in learning. He had never truly committed to a regular seder, always coming up with excuses, telling himself it wasn't realistic right now. And then he remembered something else. Just the day before, he had randomly chosen to listen to a shiur from a rabbi he had never heard before — a class recorded over ten years ago, out of thousands he could have selected. It was on the topic of Elul and Teshuvah, even though we're now in the month of Av. And incredibly, that rabbi spoke directly to the exact excuse this man had been telling himself for years. The rabbi explained why that excuse doesn't hold up, and how important it is for every Jew to carve out time to learn — even in a busy life. Now, in the span of 24 hours, Hashem had sent him three clear messages: His wife's mistake led to a danger that got him very worked up. The Gemara he "happened" to open addressed his exact situation showing him he was more guilty than his wife. The shiur he "randomly" chose directly called out his long-held excuse. He said, "I couldn't believe the hashgachah pratit. It was all connected. Hashem was clearly sending me a message, and this time, I didn't want to miss it." He picked up the phone, called his rabbi, and said, "It's time. Please help me start a serious learning schedule." Hashem speaks to us in different ways, at different moments. But it's up to us to open our hearts and pay attention to the message. Another man shared with me that from the time he graduated high school until the age of 35, he didn't put on Tefillin even once. He had drifted far from the path he was capable of being on. He loved his children dearly and would do anything for them. One day, his wife gently said, "Would you mind putting on Tefillin just for a few minutes each day — not for yourself, but so the kids can see their father wearing Tefillin?" That comment hit him like a ton of bricks. He realized how far he had gone — so far that his wife had to ask him to put on Tefillin, not even for Hashem, not even for himself, but just as an example for the kids. The very next day, he put on his Tefillin. He said he felt something special — something he hadn't felt in years. Slowly, one small step at a time, he began to come back. He started attending shul. He began learning Torah. Today, that same man has children learning full time, and he himself is growing stronger and stronger in his Avodat Hashem every single day. He is grateful beyond words for that moment that woke him up — that small comment that sparked something great. Every person is given opportunities for inspiration. Some are subtle, some are loud. Hashem wants all of His children close to Him, and He lovingly sends each one the exact kind of message they need. But it's our decision whether or not we act on it. We are getting closer and closer to the time of Yemei HaMashiach, when Hashem will fully reveal Himself to the world. Then, the tests we face now — the quiet, hidden tests of Emunah and consistency — will no longer exist. There will be no more confusion, no more doubt. But also, no more chance to grow through struggle. Now is the time. Now is the chance to grow in Torah, to grow in mitzvot, to become the people we are meant to become. Let's take the messages from Hashem and let them move us forward. Even one step today can change our entire life. And that one step can affect generations.
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  • The Only Vessel That Holds Blessing
    Chazal teach us that the Beit HaMikdash was destroyed because of Sinat Chinam—baseless hatred. And our Rabbis have explained that, in truth, almost all hatred is baseless , because we know that whatever another person does to us is ultimately coming directly from Hashem. Even though people have free will, person A cannot use that free will to harm person B unless Hashem allows it—and that only happens if it's meant to be. If someone is able to cause us pain, it's only because Hashem decreed it for our benefit. It may have saved us from something far worse. Instead of resentment, we should feel joy that Hashem is taking care of us in the way He knows is best. When we overcome our natural reactions and respond with emunah, our relationships become more peaceful and loving. That inner peace brings happiness—but more than that, it is Avodat Hashem of the highest level, and it opens the gates of blessing. Chazal say, "The only vessel that can hold blessing is peace." A person can have a spouse, children, multiple homes, cars, and all the wealth in the world—but if there is no peace, none of it can be enjoyed. It's worthless. One of the greatest pieces of advice for someone who wants more happiness and more blessing in life is to make peace with those they are at odds with. A man told me a story that began about ten years ago. His father had a bitter falling-out with a longtime business partner, and the partnership ended with deep resentment. The partner left, and the father continued running the business with his son. But after the split, the company began to struggle. The atmosphere at work became heavy, and nothing was going right. There was tension everywhere. Seven years later, out of nowhere, the former partner walked back in and asked for a job. Surprisingly, they agreed—and gave him a high-level position. From that day on, the business began to grow and flourish. Today, it's more successful than it ever was. The son couldn't understand how this man just showed up again. When he asked his father, the answer became clear: "That machloket was bothering me for years," his father said. "One day I decided to call him, apologize, and make peace. I felt such relief afterward, and I guess he felt comfortable enough to return and ask for a job." There's no doubt: the success came from the act of shalom. When peace is made, everyone feels better—and even more importantly, we bring tremendous nachat ruach to Hashem, who wants nothing more than to see His children getting along. People may hurt us, but it's our job to fulfill Hashem's will and love them anyway. It's not always easy. But with a little chizuk, we can do it. A woman shared with me that she and her husband weren't invited to a certain wedding. They knew the reason and were okay with it. But on the day of the wedding, they kept getting phone calls from others: "What time are you going?" "Want me to save you a seat at the reception?" "Are you bringing the kids?"—all assuming they were invited. Each call felt like another dagger. By the time the wedding started, they were fuming. The woman wanted to forgive, but it felt too painful. The very next morning, she opened a daily email on emunah that she hadn't opened in over a week. The title? "When You Aren't Invited to a Wedding." She couldn't believe it. She read it again and again until the message sank in. It reminded her that everything comes from Hashem—that even this was tailor-made for her benefit. With that perspective, she found the strength to truly forgive. And afterward? She felt so free. Holding on to anger and hurt only poisons us. But when we let go, when we forgive—even when it's hard—and believe that everything is from Hashem, we feel lighter, more joyful, and we open our lives to blessing. If we can do that, B'ezrat Hashem we'll merit the rebuilding of the Beit HaMikdash. Amen.
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